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Spending your entire childhood having your flaws inspected, scrutinized, and analyzed over and over was enough to shatter the self-esteem of even the most confident supermodel, let alone a perfectly average girl from Syracuse.
I couldn’t remember a time when I hadn’t hated my awkward, disproportionate girl body. I hated that my hips were too wide and my boobs were too big. I hated that whenever I walked into a room, guys looked at my chest and not my face, as if my figure somehow defined me. I hated that even though I despised modeling, Mom still forced me to attend shoots until I was deemed plus size by the industry, and she finally lost the ability to use her name and connections to cast me for jobs.
It had taken me a long time to learn to accept myself. And then Ben—the one person who had always made me feel beautiful—had shattered my heart, breaking the fragile pieces he’d managed to heal, and I’d fallen back into old habits. Hiding under baggy, shapeless clothes, avoiding the mirror, and restricting what I ate.
Ella said something, and I blinked across at her. “Sorry, what?”
“I was just saying it’s really nice having another girl around.” She smiled. A genuine, warm smile that thawed some of the ice around my heart. “My best friend Mila got a boyfriend over the summer, and I’ve barely spoken to her. Which I totally get. But as much as I love the guys, I need to talk about more than just hockey stats, dick size, and Noah’s latest lay.”
I bristled at the mention of him, and Ella frowned. “Oh no, what did he do?”
“Nothing.”
“You can’t take anything he says too seriously. He’s a good guy underneath all that cocky playboy exterior.”
“I’m sure he is,” I murmured, barely meeting her gaze.
I didn’t want him to be a good guy. I wanted him to be the villain. Because if he were the bad guy, it would soften the blow of his thoughtless words.
“He’s probably feeling the pressure of having a beautiful girl move into the house.”
“I highly doubt that.”
“It’s true,” she chuckled. “Noah isn’t exactly known for his ability to keep his hands off a pretty girl.”
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her that wasn’t going to be a problem. Even if I wasn’t Austin’s sister, I wasn’t his type. He’d made that crystal clear.
“So I was thinking,” Ella went on, “do you want to come over tomorrow night? We could get takeout, watch a movie? Drink copious amounts of wine. Aiden’s girlfriend, Dayna, is coming up from Dupont Beach. It’ll be fun.”
“I…” I hesitated.
Ella was nice. Kind and friendly, she’d been keen to get to know me tonight but hadn’t pushed for more than I was willing to give. I appreciated that and got the vibe she was the kind of girl who uplifted others, not dragged them down.
Or stabbed you in the back the second you turned around.
“Yeah, okay,” I said. “I’d like that.”
“Great. Give me your phone, and I’ll tap in my number. Then you can call me, and I’ll have yours.”
We’d just finished exchanging numbers when the guys reappeared with pizza.
“Sustenance has arrived,” Connor said, sliding a box toward us. “Veggies for the girls. Meat for the guys. Although you can have my meat later.” He winked at Ella, and she rolled her eyes, suppressing a smile.
“Here, grab a plate,” Austin said, ignoring Connor’s sexual quip as if it happened all the time.
I figured it probably did.
“Oh, I’m not hungry, but thanks.”
“Not hungry?” Connor looked mortified. “But pizza after a night out is like the holy grail.”
“It’s a good job you work out two hours a day,” Austin said. “Or you’d be rockin’ one big muffin top.”
Connor patted his stomach and yanked up his sweater a fraction. “Nothing here to see except washboard abs for days. What says you, Aurora?”
“Con!” Ella flashed me an apologetic smile. “You’ll have to excuse my boyfriend; too many years of being worshiped by puck bunnies has gone to his head.”
I shifted uncomfortably, my gaze darting anywhere but Connor’s rock-hard stomach, which was still on display.
