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“The hell you did.” Granger’s shadow loomed over the blanket. Actually it was the shadows of two large men hovering above them, Granger holding a Raging Steed and Thomas with a baby bottle. “The guy with the knife did that. And really, he didn’t come close.”
“You know what I mean,” Bliss murmured.
Granger grunted an objection, but then Thomas pulled him away for a private conversation. As she watched them go, she checked on Granger’s gait, his posture. He didn’t ever say if something was hurting, but she’d learned to recognize the signs. She considered it her job to make sure he didn’t overdo it.
The sweet weight of Teddy in her arms made her drowsy. He was also pressing on her belly, causing the baby inside her to kick back. She gave a little yelp. “I think the cousins are having a moment here.” She addressed her belly. “That’s right, podling, don’t let that big boy push you around.”
Carly laughed and put out her arms for Teddy. Bliss passed him over to her sister with a lingering look of regret. She hadn’t felt that way on the plane to Germany with the crying child next to her. She’d been relieved when he dropped off to sleep and she could relax. Knowing that her own baby was coming changed everything.
Could she do this? Really?
Glancing up at Carly, she caught her sister’s compassionate gaze again. As if she’d read Bliss’ mind, she said firmly, “You’re going to be a great mom.”
“How can you possibly say that?” Bliss leaned back on her hands and adjusted her position. “I learned everything I know from my own mother, and she’s…well, you know.”
It always felt so disloyal to criticize her mother. But Carly understood; she was probably one of the few people in the world who did. Maybe that was one of the beauties of family. You could commiserate without feeling like a traitor.
“Can I tell you something?” Carly asked gently.
Bliss’ eyes widened. “About my mother?”
“Yes. And you. It’s something I overheard Gault saying. He was talking with Alvin at the bar in the Blue Drake. It was that same summer when I met Thomas, and I was sneaking into the bar to grab a bottle of champagne to celebrate our first—anyway.” Flustered, she broke off. Bliss bit her tongue to keep from laughing. “They were talking about Serenity. Gault was worried because she was acting crazy and he didn’t know what to do. He was asking Alvin if he should get his lawyer to file for custody.”
Bliss’ stomach clenched.Relax, relax. Don’t let the nausea in.“He asked me once if I wanted him to do that. I told him no—in my own kid way.”
“Well, that’s what Alvin said too. He said it would be too disruptive, and that lawyers just make things worse. But the main thing he said was, that kid is tougher than she seems. She’ll tell you if she needs help. You gotta trust her. Keep communication open and trust her.”
Carly gave a passable imitation of Alvin’s Arkansas drawl.
“I’m embarrassed to admit that at first I didn’t believe he was talking about you. I thought of you as this little pixie child, kind of floating along, oblivious to when the dishes needed washing, that kind of thing.”
“That’s true, I didn’t really pay attention to stuff like that. It’s probably because my mom and I either ate out, got takeout, or used paper plates. My mother thought that as the ex-wife of a rock star, she should live a certain lifestyle. I think we had a few mugs for coffee, but that was about it. I honestly thought everyone just threw their paper plates away when the meal was over.”
“I never knew any of that.” Carly made more goofy faces at Teddy, who clapped his hands and gurgled with laughter. “But it explains why you always acted like the household chores had nothing to do with you.”
“Oh God.” Bliss buried her face in her hands. “You must have thought I was beyond spoiled.”
“Just one of the many wrong ideas I had about you. That’s really what I want to say. Alvin was right. You’re tougher than you seem. You’re going to be fine.”
A compliment. From her older sister.
Her throat tightened. Her eyes stung. Then, surprising both herself and Carly, Bliss burst into tears. “I don’t feel tough at all. I feel like a piece of dandelion fluff that got caught in a fan and keeps spinning around and around.”
“Oh no. Oh no. I made you cry. I didn’t mean to make you cry. Is it the hormones? Is it me?”
“Hor…hormones,” she gasped, just trying to catch her breath. “I’m sorry. I keep falling apart.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Bliss saw Granger hurrying toward her, leaving Thomas standing in the eelgrass by the shoreline. She held up a hand to hold him off. He stopped where he was, giving Thomas time to catch up with him. She didn’t want either of them here. This was between her and Carly.
“Don’t be sorry! Everyone gets to fall apart sometimes. I’m a pro at it. Remember when Thomas dumped me way back when? I fell apart for like, a year.”
Bliss swiped at the tears leaking from her eyes. “But I couldn’t be like that. I always had to be perfect. If I was in a bad mood, Mom would freak out and tell me to smile no matter what. She was always so afraid that I’d lose bookings or screw up a shoot or get a bad reputation in the industry.”
Carly shook her head. “God, that sounds impossible. Like you couldn’t be a regular teenager. Teenagers are moody, everyone knows that.”
“I never felt like a teenager. I always felt like a…a…” God, these hormones were a bitch. She wrestled with her unruly emotions until she got a grip on herself. “Performer. Like I was playing a part, and I might forget a line if I relaxed for even a moment. One time I was worried about a fight I’d had with my mom over a booking, and I was distracted during makeup. The makeup artist made a joke about ‘blissed-out Bliss’ and how spacey I was, and I thought, ‘bingo.’ I can make that work for me. That way if I get something wrong, people will just laugh it off.”
“Oh Bliss.” The compassion in Carly’s voice nearly made Bliss burst into tears again. “I had no idea. I always thought your life was charmed compared to mine. You always seemed to float above the world as if nothing bothered you.”
