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Of course. I’m all alone now, and I have no one else to blame.
There’ll be no bartering in the shadows. Any demons who survive long enough to make it their home are like me: fully demonic, and unable—or unwilling—to be part of a clan. We’re all alone, and with the magic inside of me weakened by the shadows, I’ll have to do everything on my own if I want to exist long enough to meet my mate.
Because that’s all I have to live for, and all I’ve ever wanted. For three centuries, I hungered for her. To know what it was to be loved, to be touched, to fill her with my seed and be there as we rear our offspring. To share my essence, to accept hers, to be the best male I could be... all that I could have had if I’d just waited.
Why didn’t I wait?
I shall wait now. I shall claw my way through every day, lurking in the darkness, hoping for the moment when she’ll favor me with her body, her heart, and her essence.
And, gods willing, I’ll have a drop of my own to give her in return.
Because, even as I give in to the urge to throw back my head and roar to break up the eerie quiet of the watching shadows, I know that the only thing that will save me from my terrible mistake is my fated female calling me to her. Summoning me to her side. The mate bond snapping into place could heal the fractures of my soul, replenishing the essence of Loki, her mate’s promise finally banishing the shadows that have taken root inside of me.
Until then, I belong to the dark. To the shadows.
And should they take me before my mate can find me? It’s no less than what I deserve for thinking she wasn’t worth waiting for…
CHAPTER1
GRIMOIRE DU SOMBRA
KENNEDY
Iknew that I was in trouble when I started thinking that a little B&E might not be such a bad idea.
I was sitting on my towel, sprawled out on the sands of Point Pleasant beach, staring at the waves rolling in even though my thoughts were back in Jericho, New York.
The chill from the ocean meant I’d left my swimsuit back at the hotel. Instead, I had a t-shirt and pair of capris on, wondering if I should just cut my trip short so I can start planning my new life of crime.
The beach was empty. Technically, it wasn’t open yet. Memorial Day weekend marked the opening of the Jersey Shore and I was a couple of weeks early. It was the only week I could get away from my bookstore, though, and I’d desperately needed the vacation when I planned it back in January.
Of course, that was before I started obsessing over an antique book…
When I first sold the old leather-bound book a few weeks ago, I was just glad to get a good price for it. I teasingly told my customer that theGrimoire du Sombra—seriously, that was the name printed inside of it—was a spellbook. I didn’t really mean it, and I’d bet that Shannon didn’t actually believe me, either. But she gave me fifty bucks for it, and if she wanted to think it was an old magic book, that was fine with me.
But then I started to think about it. At the strangest times, the big, brown book would pop into my brain. At first, I thought it was because I might have been able to get more for it if I had thrown it up on eBay instead of selling it at the store. I mean, I like money. That was why I couldn’t stop thinking about the stupid thing, right?
Yeah… when I started to actualdreamabout reading it, even a book lover like me had to admit that I was being kind of weird—and that’s nothing compared to my brilliant idea of sneaking into Shannon’s apartment and stealing it if only to figure out why it seemed to have cast some kind of spell onme.
What worried me even more is how that actually seemed like a much better idea to me than, I don’t know, maybe asking my customer if I could buy it from her?
That’s what a clear-headed, non-obsessed,normalwoman would do, right? Of course, if you ask my ex, I’m none of those things. And, in his perspective, it’s also the reason we’re exes.
In my perspective, it’s because he was trash and I’m better off without him.
And, no, I’m not bitter that he ended things after so many years together. For the last five or six of them—ever since I opened up my little shop on Main Street in Jericho—we were more roommates than lovers anyway, and I was almost expecting it when it was over. Blaming the demise of our relationship on my obsession—ha!—with books and my stubborn need to run Turn the Page on my own without any staff or any of his help, Tyler decided that he didn’t want to be second to my store any longer. Fair enough. Honestly, he could’ve left at any time and, while it would’ve hurt, I would’ve understood.
But he didn’t leave. Oh, no. He just started an affair—
No. That makes it sound nicer than it was. What Tyler really did was start fucking my younger sister, Hallie, behind my back. Twenty-eight to my thirty-two at the time, she was my shadow when we were kids, and my best friend a decade ago.
Now I haven’t spoken to her, Tyler, or my parents in two years, planning a solo trip to the New Jersey shore was the highlight of my last six months, and I ruined it by pretending I was Carmen freaking Sandiego or something, plotting how to steal a book instead of hitting the clubs and getting laid for the first time since I found out Tyler was sticking his dick in my little sister.
That’s what I had planned to do during my trip. I’m still holding out hope for Mr. Right, but I would take Mr. Right Now just to scratch this itch I have.
This is the longest I’ve been single since I started dating in middle school. I might not have beeninlove with Tyler anymore, but our break-up sucked. I had planned my whole life around that asshole. We were going to get married. Tyler and me… we hadn’t set a date yet, but after dating for eight years and being engaged for three, it would’ve been sooner than later. Kids would have finally come next, little footsteps pattering around the backroom of my shop, giggling as they toppled over stacks of stock I hadn’t put out yet.
That dream died a fiery death two years ago when I ran upstairs to the apartment during a shift at the store and found Tyler plowing Hallie in our bed. So shocked at what I found, I remember throwing one of my heels at his back. When he yelped, jumping off of her, my other heel got Hallie right in the forehead as she sat up, already trying to explain.
