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“I see.” I tried not to feel disheartened by the fact. I had hoped that the Souris would be where I’d finally feel normal, but I was beginning to accept that place didn’t exist.
Amalia reached for my hand. “It’s all right, you know. Remember, I am the same, too. And it’s necessary, this difference of ours, because it’s what allows us to defend the people we care for.” She sent a knowing look to her son. “Another royal trait is how we take our responsibilities to heart. Too much so in some cases.”
“I am to blame,” Vladimir said matter-of-factly. “I was five, not one. I understood what was right and wrong, and I chose to believe that Father would change his mind when I overheard him talking to those creatures. I chose wrongly.”
Amalia raised a brow at me, as if asking, Do you see what I mean?
I certainly did. “Vladimir...” I paused, trying to search for the right way to tell him it was not his fault. Nothing came, and I ended up resorting to what I usually resorted to when I was lost for words. “That pain in your heart...if you think feeling guilty and punishing yourself will make it go away, it won’t. You just have to learn to embrace it, you know? It’s like what Charles said.”
Vladimir blinked. “Charles?”
I nodded fervently. “The ability to bear the pain without breaking. It’s our greatest gift, and it’s what makes us stronger.”
He said carefully, “You make sense, but may I ask...”
I said eagerly, “Anything.”
“Who is Charles?”
“Oh. The professor. You know? Charles Xavier? Professor X?”
Juriaan was the first to laugh, followed by my mother, and even the Vladimir cracked a smile. “They warned us about that, too.”
I immediately knew what he meant and I protested, “Just because a superhero said it doesn’t make it any less true.”
Vladimir stepped forward and ruffled my hair. It was his first time to touch me, and I felt his immense strength, courage, and power through that touch. “You’ve done well, little sister. With all the adversities you have faced, I am impressed with the way you have remained unblemished with cynicism.” His tone was quiet and serious as he said, “You are definitely a warrior I would be proud to have fighting at my side.”
His words sobered me. They reminded me of the inescapable present and the choices that awaited me. “I’m glad you said that.” I tried to smile but failed. “I’m hoping it won’t turn out that way, but if it does...”
“We stand behind you and beside you, daughter. Your enemies are our enemies.” Amalia was the one who answered, her voice eerily cold, and when I looked at her, I realized that she was and wasn’t herself. It was as if her darker half had emerged, but it was under Amalia’s control, her dark powers leashed and the Queen’s to command.
“I didn’t know you could do that,” I whispered.
Vladimir said, “It takes time and practice, but we’ll do our best to train you so that, you, too, may exercise the same control as soon as possible.”
“That would be nice. I’m hoping things will end peacefully, but...”
Amalia laughed, and the sound of it made me shiver. “You may wish it as much as you can, but we all know that peace in this situation can only be won by having blood in our hands.” Danger flashed in her wise blue eyes. “And I will not stop to ensure that it’s their blood – not yours – that’s shed.”
Vladimir reached for Mother’s hand. “Your Majesty, enough.”
Seconds passed before the ice-blue fire in her eyes faded.
“When we get older,” Vladimir explained to me without taking his eyes off Amalia’s, “turning starts taking a toll on our physical bodies.”
Amalia’s strained face was proof of it, and she wryly admitted as much. “I’m afraid it’s true. But if you both think that’s going to stop me from helping you two in battle, you are dead wrong of course.” Her voice turned extra sweet. “Be reminded that I am the Queen, and in the end, it is what I decide that must be followed.”
That was true, too, but I was determined she’d never have a reason to fight. Seeing my mother weakened after turning – that was what they called my dark fits – was terrifying. I didn’t want to lose her when I had just found her.
I looked at Vladimir. “Maybe, if my plan works, there won’t be a need to fight.”
“For the sake of your adopted family,” my brother said in a chilling voice, “I do hope that you are right.”
Chapter Three
ALEJANDRO
It was too bad Lyccans couldn’t get drunk. If only he could, then maybe he would have started feeling numb a long time ago. But he wasn’t and so the pain caused by Calys’ last words continued to gnaw at him.
