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Now I’m the one surprised. I lean over and run my finger over her bottom lip before kissing it. “That’s the only way you deserve.” Settling between her legs again, I caress her pretty face. Her blue eyes waver between the light of hope and a darkness ready to take over.
My heart aches. I can do so much, almost everything in the here and now, for her, from taking care of her emotionally, physically, and financially. But I don’t know if I can give her the reassurance she truly needs. “I’ll be here for you, but the rest . . .”
I lift just enough to see the emotions waging war in her eyes. I don’t know how we got here, or how I did. Love has never held intrigue for me. It’s not something I go near. But with her, and because of Tuesday, it pains me to give voice to it, unlocking a fear of losing her. But with that deep-seated admission to myself, I remind myself that honesty is also equally valued, and say, “The rest is up to you and what you choose to do.”
19
Tuesday
Saturday mornings are for sleeping in, coffee and books, and lazing the day away. Or is that Sunday?
I wish I knew what I liked to do on the weekends, but nothing Loch has suggested could coax me out of this bed right now. I don’t seem to be able to summon the same energy he has in the morning. He returned more than an hour ago, has showered, made breakfast, and then showed me an app of “Top Things to Do in New York City.”
I had drifted back to sleep at one point until he busted me and dove onto the bed, effectively waking me up again. I’ve been scrolling the app ever since. Frustrated by the lack of any recollection of these places, I ask, “Wonder what the bottom things to do are? Oh wait. I know. Getting mugged and having amnesia.”
“I can’t tell if you’re joking or not.”
Keeping his funny bone in suspense makes me laugh. “Why would I joke about getting mugged and having amnesia?”
“That’s what I thought, but the way you laid the groundwork for a punchline was top-notch.”
“It’s a joke that would never land.”
His brows squish together in the middle. A few days ago, that appeared to be his resting face, but something has changed in that time, and the lines have eased along with his demeanor. “See? I have no idea if you’re being funny.”
I toss the phone to the bed and roll over to face him. Still feeling too far, I decide I need to touch him all over or have him over me. I need his comfort and heat. Getting to my knees, I straddle him and then lay my body with the length of his. Loch’s arms come around me. He even kisses the top of my head while continuing to scroll.
“What do you like to do on the weekends?” I ask, closing my eyes while using his chest as a pillow.
“I have no idea anymore. My brother and I used to find a court and play basketball or head back to Beacon and spend the weekend with my family. Now, I work.”
“Mm. That’s why you never fail. It’s work, work, work all the time.”
“I’m thirty, Tuesday. What I do now is the biggest predictor of how my career will turn out. Working hard is not a bad thing.”
“Not bad. Perfect. Too perfect.” I thought I wanted to sleep right here, but that seems less likely by the second. I lift my head and rest my chin on him. With his head resting on a pillow, he gives me his gaze, which makes me smile. “You are so much more than you realize. You’re funny and . . .” I want to blush from how fast he made me come. “Incredible in bed—”
“This is how rumors get started.”
“See? Funny. But you don’t show it to the world very often.”
“I don’t show them how incredible in bed, your words not mine, I am either.” His hand covers my left shoulder blade, wrapping half of me in a hug. “Law isn’t generally a lighthearted profession. Have I become a dud?”
“I don’t know what a dud is, but you’re not one of them. That’s my point.” I lay my head back down, listening to his heartbeat.
“I’m not everyone’s cup of tea. I work ridiculously long hours, I spend little time at home, I’ve been known to sleep at my office, and I end up canceling ninety percent of my dates due to my caseload. So yeah, I don’t have much time to give people, and even fewer deserve it. I’m selective, and some might think that callous. That’s not how I see it. Driven to the point of exhaustion, I don’t have many opportunities to have a good time and crack jokes. If you’re in my life, it’s because I want to spend time with you.”
