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My first thoughts were of Logan. I figured he might have stopped by to leave me a surprise somewhere or even just to pay me a visit to ask me why I was being so distant, but I didn’t find anything. Nor did I find him there. Before getting into the shower, I took a quick look around to see if I could find anything out of place and for a moment I didn’t. I thought I was just tired from the day and feeling paranoid. Until I noticed my lockbox had been moved from the shelf in my closet onto the floor.
“What the hell?”
I gently lifted the box into my hands, trying to remember whether I was the one who had left it down or not. I couldn’t remember opening that box for a while, though. There were old pictures and police documents inside that I hardly ever wanted to look at, so I knew I couldn’t have left it out.
Immediately, I went to my phone and called the first person I could think to call—Logan. I was so terrified that Lucas had found me and realized what I was doing that I panicked and called him over to come and check the apartment.
“What is it?” he asked, comforting me as I met him at the front steps of the apartment. “Is everything okay?”
“I’m not sure.” I whimpered a little as he held me in his arms. “I think someone was in the apartment.”
He frowned a little as he charged upstairs to the apartment to check things out for me. The last time I remembered feeling this fearful was the day I’d decided to finally pack up and leave Lucas for good.
“Are you sure someone was here? I don’t see anything broken or missing. All of the windows are locked.”
“I don’t know.” I flopped down on the couch and rested my head in my hands. “I came home and things felt weird, so I started looking around and found my lockbox on the floor of the closet. That wasn’t where I left it.”
He let out a sigh and sat down next to me. When he tried to wrap his arms around me again, I quickly stood up and paced the floor. I had called him over for comfort, but I didn’t want things to go any further than him just checking out the apartment, even though I longed for it.
“Ariane, what’s the deal? Things have been so different between us lately. Did I do something wrong? Or say something you didn't like?”
I’d known that sooner or later this question would come around. And I knew sooner or later I would have to give him an answer. I didn’t like being put on the spot, but I knew I had to get it off my chest before things got worse.
“Logan,” I sighed. “I don’t know. I just think we should keep things professional. It’s kind of sad to say now, after we’ve done what we’ve done, but I think it’s for the best.”
“Why?” he asked, standing to his feet. “What happened?”
He really had no idea how terrible he’d made me feel the night of the CEO event, and I really didn’t have the energy to explain it to him. But I did anyway. Just to clear the air.
“This might sound ridiculous to you, but the night of the CEO event, you said I was there as your date. Yet you didn’t acknowledge me as your date at all,” I scoffed. “You didn’t even introduce me as your date to the people you introduced me to. I felt so out of place and undermined, I wanted to leave the entire night. But I didn’t, because I didn’t want to ruin the event for you. I know I have no right to feel entitled to your care or concern, but that really hurt my feelings.”
It was the first time I’d felt secure enough to be that vulnerable in such a long time, I actually teared up while I spoke my truth. I felt great getting things off my chest, but I also felt bad for continuing to carry my secret. I felt like I didn’t have a right to even speak about how I felt, because our entire relationship was based on a lie that could ruin more than just an event for Logan.
“Ariane, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He looked very sincere, but his eyes told me he had done what he felt needed to be done. “In my profession, there’s a certain image I have to uphold. It sucks that I let that image cloud my judgment, but that night, it did. I'm sorry if that hurt your feelings, I was just doing what I needed to do for my business. I am so sorry, love.”
Chapter Fifteen
Logan
Idrovemyselfhomefrom Ariane’s apartment completely confused. I wasn’t sure if I should have actually been confused, or if it was merely my ego getting in the way. The night of the CEO event, I’d felt conflicted. I didn’t know how I would’ve been viewed had I introduced Ariane as my date, being that she was eighteen years younger than me. I knew a lot of men my age who dated younger women, but I was different. People looked up to me; they respected me for the morals and standards I upheld. Not to mention my daughter would have probably never spoken to me again had I dropped the bomb on her that night.
When I got home, I rushed straight to my study to pour myself a drink. Not long after I’d sat myself down to enjoy it, Casey barged in throwing out insults. I had no idea where her anger or accusations stemmed from, but she sounded awfully sure of herself.
“I saw you with her tonight at her apartment! Damnit, Dad. Why couldn’t you just be honest with me? With yourself? Why lie, when you knew the truth would come out one way or the next?”
“What? Casey, I don’t have time for your temper tantrums tonight. What are you talking about?”
I pretended not to know why she was upset or what she was ranting and raging about. She’d seen me hugging Ariane at the lobby entrance and couldn’t figure out why I was even there in the first place. I wanted to do more than hug Ariane. I wanted to comfort her, hold her body close to mine, feel her warmth again, and forget about my worries, even just for the time being.
“Ariane? I saw you hugging her. I saw you go upstairs to her apartment and not return down for at least an hour and when you did, you were angry. Why were you angry? What's to be so angry about if you two are only working together?”
“I wasn’t angry. And what the hell, why were you following me?”
“Oh, please.” She scoffed and folded her arms across her chest as she glared at me with a look of disgust and disappointment. “Don’t try to dodge the question. Just tell me the truth. Or was Mom right about you all along?” Her eyes teared up with frustration and hurt, as she compared her mother's words to my actions. “Were you the one who stepped out on our family first?”
Her question hurt me to my core. I would have never stepped out my wife, my children. I loved my family with every bone in my body, so to have my own daughter question the validity of that was a pill I refused to swallow.
“What happened with your mother and me has nothing to do with right now.” My tone was cold and dense. “I loved your mother. And you and your brother. I would have never done anything to hurt you.”
