Page 12 of The End of Me


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“You make me sound radioactive.”

Seth rolled his eyes but continued playing.

I wasn’t sure if you knew the appropriate use of the word. So I had to ask, “Do you know what radioactive means? I learned it the other day, and it has nothing to do with people—actually, it’s bad for humans.”

“Exactly,” you claimed as if I understood your point. “He makes it sound like I’m bad for people. I promise that I’m not.”

“You like grown-up words?” I asked, almost excited.

“We’re not allowed to say grown-up words,” you whispered, then crossed your eyes and sighed, annoyed. “Even though my grandfather says them all the time.”

I frowned. “I think we’re talking about different grown-up words. I meant words like radioactive.”

Seth laughed. “That’s not a grown-up word. Fuck, dickhead, son of—”

“Seth, language!” Ms. Ainsley reprimanded him.

“Sorry, Mom. I was listing the adult words we’re not allowed to say until we’re old enough to earn a salary and support ourselves.”

“Those are cuss words,” Dad argued.

“Which only grown-ups use,” Jude pointed out. “We children, can’t say them.”

Dad glared. “How old are they?”

Ms. Ainsley shrugged. “Their birth certificates say between three and four, but they behave between the ages of twenty and forty.”

Dad bobbed his head and smiled at me. “You’ll fit in perfectly with them, buddy.”

“He will,” you assured him, taking my hand and squeezing gently. “You’re among friends now.”

“You’re still a stranger,” I insisted.

“Then let’s get to play so I can become your best friend in the entire world.” You stretched your hands from one side to the other. “Maybe the entire galaxy—that’s bigger.”

I smiled because you spoke my language. We had the best first day. I even have the video to prove it. Did you know your aunt Ainsley recorded us playing music? The USB is inside a small blue envelope marked with the number 1 and the letter V. Each video is numbered. Watch only number one—don’t cheat, or I’ll know.

Where were we? Right, I got home tired but happy. I ate lunch but couldn’t nap. I was buzzing with excitement. Mom couldn’t handle me, so she asked Dad to take me with him to pick up my brothers from school.

“How was school, buddy?” Kingston asked as he climbed into the minivan. He waited until Myles, Burke, and Zach were in the car before he slid the door shut. Then, he made sure everyone was in their seat and had their seat belt on so Dad could drive away.

Kingston wasn’t only the oldest but also the one who looked after us when Dad was out of town. Myles was the second-in-command, as Dad liked to say. I couldn’t wait to be old enough to help them protect the family. After all, I had a little brother and a little sister to care for.

I believe I accomplished my goal. But… maybe they depend on me too much. And I know it’s unfair to ask for this, but look out for them, okay?

Since I didn’t respond to King, he immediately said, “It’s okay if you don’t want to go back, Archie. You’re a genius. You can catch up later.”

“I like the school,” I responded before my family decided to keep me home for another school year.

The thought of not seeing you or hanging out with your cousins terrified me. “Can I please go again tomorrow?” I begged.

“You will,” Dad assured me.

“Huh, you liked it? What was your favorite thing?” King asked.

I shrugged because I didn’t know how to explain what I liked the most, which was you. Okay, it wasn’t only you. It was fun to be around your cousins and have music time too.

The Decker cousins understood me. They didn’t look at me as if I was some weirdo who couldn’t be a kid. I played music, but I wasn’t like you guys. How could I be when you came from a big family of musicians?

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