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A bunch of people overhear him and let out little cheers and give him high fives. Which he takes as an excuse to get out of his seat and stride over to me to give me his own high five. Mr. Hogan calls out for him to get back to his desk, but he’s smiling too, just like everyone else. I’m pretty sure there isn’t a person in this school who isn’t rooting for Sebastian Murdoch. And I’m starting to suspect it’s not just because he’s the star quarterback. A lot of it has to do with the kind of guy he is. He’s got this charisma that just draws everyone in.
The rest of the week feels like it flies by. I have a couple of after-school shifts at Board and Brews, which go really well. And by the end of the week, I look forward to my shifts there. I’m still sort of intimidated by Maggie and Hayden, just because they are everything I wish I was. And because I want so much for them to like me. But I’m feeling a wee bit more relaxed around them. Not enough to agree to stay late on Friday to play a game with them, though. Still, baby steps, right?
The Titans have a game Friday night, and I would be lying if I said I don’t check the score before going to bed that night. The Titans won. Of course.
I don’t want to think too much about why this makes me so happy.
I have a full day shift at Board and Brews on Saturday and I’m barely even nervous about it. I’m eating my breakfast, watching the news on my phone at the kitchen counter half an hour before my shift, when a segment comes on about Dylan Braun—the guy who was kidnapped as a toddler and raised by a serial killer. It’s basically a short interview with his father, Philip Braun, with a few video clips in between. One of them shows reporters swarming their house on Monday night, when the news of Dylan’s planned move-in date first broke out, and you can see Scarlett dodging interviewers in the background as she leaves her own house next door… joined a couple of seconds later by Sebastian. He’s shielding her and practically shoving the reporters out of their way as he guides her to his Jeep. The same Jeep he pickedmeup in that night to take me to Scoopies. Which means he went to Scarlett’s right after dropping me off.
It shouldn’t bother me, but it does. Maybe because it makes me question what Seb told me about him and Scarlett being “just friends”. I mean, if he went for a late night “drive” with her right after dropping me off, then isn’t that pretty indicative that there’s more going on between them? And if so, then I’ve clearly been deluded these past few days, thinking my connection with Sebastian is a lot more meaningful than it really is. Which makes me feel like a naïve dweeb of the first order for placing so much emphasis on something as lame as a guy just being nice to me. It definitely deflates my previously buoyant mood.
When I show up at Board and Brews, the tall, broody guy who was hanging out the day I came in to apply is here with Maggie—the guy who made those comments about my Jellyfish T-shirt. Silas, Maggie’s foster brother. He is super intimidating. And not in the same way as Maggie and Hayden, but as in he’s got a tattoo on his forearm and looks like he does cage fighting for kicks on Friday nights. Yes, he’s beautiful, because you’d have to be blind not to notice his slate-gray eyes and long lashes, and totally pouty lips, but everything else about him screamsbad boy. And not playful, mischievous bad boy, like Sebastian. More like fist fights and motorcycles bad boy. But Maggie is obviously on really good terms with him, so I need to assume he’s a decent guy.
The two of them are baking cookies when I walk in, and talking soap operas, of all things. Two activities which seem pretty incongruous with the whole bad boy vibe I slapped on him. Apparently, Silas comes in a couple times a week to do baking for the café; he just didn’t make it in last week because he’s been studying for some equivalency exam he had yesterday. From what I understand, he was at a Juvenile Detention Center for two years before living with Maggie and her mom, where he fell pretty behind in school. Which totallydoesalign with that original bad boy assessment.
So maybe I wasn’t so far off with the cage fighting thing?
For the first half hour, I mostly check a pile of games for missing pieces and then re-shelve them, while Maggs and Silas bake in the kitchen and, from what I can tell, compare character predictions for General Hospital. Then just as we’re opening, Silas’ girlfriend, Jackie, shows up. She doesn’t technically work here, but hangs out here sometimes when Silas is working.
I recognize her right away. She goes to SH Prep. She’s one of those girls who excels at everything: does really well in school, heads up a bunch of clubs and committees, is captain of a couple of sports teams, friends with the popular kids but also hangs out with the art kids and the tech nerds. And, from the little I’ve seen of her, she seems really nice, too. Or at least, I’ve never seen her be mean to anyone.
So, definitely someone who falls into the intimidating category for me. Like pretty much anyone else my age, really. Or maybe I’m just intimidated by people in general.
I really should have been a turtle.
The first hour the café opens is usually pretty slow, so the four of us just hang out around the counter chatting. Well, the three of them are chatting. I pretend to be checking games for missing pieces, even though I finished doing that before Jackie arrived. But I’d feel awkward standing there with them, since the three of them already know each other. The other times I’ve worked here, it’s just been me, Maggs, and Hayden, and I’ve kind of gotten to know them a bit. But I have no idea how to act with Silas and Jackie. And Hayden doesn’t come in for another half hour yet.
But about five minutes in, Maggs calls over to me.
“We’ll finish that stuff later, Caro! You need to come hear about Jax’s baking disasters!”
My first instinct is still fear—that if I hang out with them, maybethiswill be the time they realize what a weirdo I am. That I’m not just awkward, but off-the-charts strange. But then I remind myself of Scoops on Monday with Sebastian. And hanging out with those girls on the boardwalk. That wasn’t horrible. And this week with Maggs and Hayden wasn’t horrible either. Even school this week was okay.
So, I go over and hang out with them in the kitchen. Silas is telling us about all the ways Jackie messed up batches of cookies during the road trip the two of them took over the summer, selling cookies and stuff at music festivals across New England.
After every story, Jax insists he’s exaggerating and that her baking’s not that bad. So, after getting a family settled at a table with a couple of board games, Maggs comes back to us with this idea that the four of us should have a cookie bake-off. We will all start with the main ingredients for chocolate chip cookies, but not the quantities. We’ll each make our own tiny batch of cookies, and can also add whatever additional ingredients we want from anything that’s available in the kitchen. Then we’ll bake them and when Hayden arrives, we’ll get him to rate the cookies from worst to best, without knowing whose is whose.
“You’re all going down,” Silas says. “And ten bucks says Jax comes in last.” He leans in and kisses her neck.
It’s really funny watching Jackie and Silas together. Never in a million years would I have paired them as a couple, but it’s obvious they are totally in love. Silas seems “lighter” when he’s around her. Less sullen and a little more playful, maybe. In a broody, cynical kind of way.
The next half hour goes by in a flash. I’m sure I haven’t laughed this much in my entire life. We’re all excited about the challenge. Even me. I’m more excited than nervous around everyone now. I have that feeling like I had Monday night with Sebastian, where I’m in this weird state of disbelief that I’m experiencing these normal teenage moments. Laughing with people. Being silly. Talking about stuff that isn’t school related. I like it even more than I thought I would, those times when I let myself imagine what it might be like to be on the inside, instead of someone delegated to the sidelines.
When Hayden shows up for work, he’s totally on board with the cookie competition. And we make a big deal of setting all the cookies up for him to taste-test. There’s one batch that looks horrible. I think there may even be ketchup mixed in, along with sprinkles and something green and leafy.
By the time Hayden’s finished his taste test, which he takes super seriously, the customers at the tables are invested in the whole thing, too, making bets on which cookies will win.
Silas wins. His batch is amazing. Like, honestly, the best cookies I’ve ever tasted. I come in second (not bad for never having baked chocolate chip cookies in my life). Jax comes in third, and Maggs last. Hers were the ones with the ketchup and sprinkles. And spinach. And crushed up macaroni noodles.
I never knew being spontaneous and immature could be so much fun. I didn’t even think I was that kind of person. Maybe because I never had the opportunity.
After that, Jackie gets set up at a table in the corner of the café to work on book covers she sells on Fiverr. The café is pretty busy by now, so the rest of us don’t have much time for socializing, anyway. Maggs and Hayden and I play a game that we started earlier this week, though, where we try to guess what board game each group will play as we spot them entering the café. Hayden is actually pretty decent at guessing. Maggs and I suck.
Sometime after my lunch break, Silas wanders in with a stack of dirty dishes from a table of hardcore Gloomhavenplayers that just left. He dumps them in the large sink. “The jock and cheerleading society just showed up. I’m out.”
I get a fluttery feeling in my stomach.
But it wouldn’t behim. Sebastian and the cool kids wouldn’t hang out at a board game café on a Saturday, would they? Or any time, for that matter.
