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It's late.
I should be asleep like Noah is but I can't turn my brain off. Every time I close my eyes, I hear Noah telling my brother that this is all for show. What if he's only here to make sure I keep playing along with his stupid little game? The more time I spend with Noah, the more I like him and that scares me. I'm so terrified of getting hurt at the end of this, but I can't seem to keep my distance from him.
The question I need to ask myself is, do I trust him? Can I listen to what he's telling me and believe that it's the truth or is that seed of doubt in the back of my mind there for a reason, warning me from getting too close?
God, I wish I knew the answer.
Do I trust Noah? Do I believe what he’s telling me?
I'm not sure I do.
9
NOAH
Something isn't right.
I've had a great week with Lucy and the more time I spend with her, the more certain I am that I want this. The only thing is, I'm not sure she feels the same way. She smiles at me, she kisses me, she tells me all the right things, but there's a distance in her eyes that makes me wonder where her head is at. It's like she doesn't trust me.
Not that I blame her. I have a reputation, after all, and the way she heard me speaking about her to her brother…if I were her, I probably wouldn't trust me either. Which just means I need to work harder to make her believe that this is real. She's the first girl in a long time who I’ve had any real feelings for. In fact, if I'm honest with myself, I don't think I've ever felt this way about anyone. The thought of losing her…
Nope, I can't let that happen.
A few weeks ago, my new business was all I cared about and I would have done anything to make it happen. Now, I couldn't care less about work. Sure, I want it to succeed, but not at the expense of my relationship.
It's complicated, though, because not only am I so much older than her, my business partner is her brother. If I pursue Lucy, then I screw him over by messing up our plans. And then I screw him all over again by doing the one thing I said I wouldn't do.
Date his sister.
So, what's more important to me, my best friend, or Lucy?
A lump forms in my throat and I try to flush it away with more whisky. It doesn’t work. The way she has crawled under my skin, forcing her way into my heart, makes me want to hate her, only I can't, because I love everything about her. It doesn't matter the cost, I need her in my life, which means I need to make her believe that I'm serious about us.
And there's only one way I can think to do that.
* * *
“Are you ready for tomorrow?”
Lucy makes a face at me. “Yep. Our big engagement party. Can't wait.”
“You can at least pretend to be a little bit excited,” I tease her, pulling her into my lap. She rolls her eyes as I slowly unbutton her shirt.
“I'm just nervous. The only way for this to work is for me to pretend this engagement is actually real. So I've basically just lied to all my family and friends about this amazing guy I’m going to marry.”
“You don’t think I’m amazing?” I pretend to be hurt.
She swats my arm playfully. “You know what I mean.”
“Pretty sure I can make those nerves disappear,” I tell her, reaching behind her back to unclasp her bra.
“I'm sure you can,” she agrees, leaning down to kiss me.
“I never back down from a challenge, remember?”
She smiles, lifting her arms to let me remove her shirt and let it fall to the floor behind her. Her bra follows quickly after, allowing me to cup her breasts. I rub my thumb over one of her nipples, smiling when her eyes darken and she bites her lower lip.
“Still nervous?” I tease.
