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I want to know everything.
Lowering my head, I look up at his face as I run my lips over the soft flesh next to the wound, a low noise escaping my throat as I rub my hard dick beneath my sweats.
Fuck.
I don’t know what’s gotten into me.
This hate inside me feels like a living, breathing thing, and it wants Xavi Hart. Now that he’s within reach, it wants to take him and own him, to pin him down and punish him for what he’s done, to make him cry and beg for me to make it stop.
He suddenly hisses, and I look down, releasing him when I realize I was digging my fingers into the cut, hard enough to make it bleed again.
Still sleeping, he groans and rolls over onto his other side, knocking his knee into my head before he curls up with his back to me. I lean over him and chuck the blanket on the floor out of his reach, hoping he freezes to death.
I should leave now, but I don't.
I want to know, damn it.
Grabbing his phone off the charger on the nightstand, I unlock it with the passcode I guess on the first try. Katy’s birthday. Same as mine.
Opening his recent call list, I scroll through and try to figure out if he was with anyone tonight. Of course the only people he’s talked to in the last week are his dad, Carter, and a single call from Easton. He doesn’t have any of his own friends, the fucking loser.
I go to his messages next, but there’s nothing exciting there. The only one of interest to me is from his dad. He texted him this afternoon but Xavi never replied.
Dad:
Don’t forget you have an appointment with your therapist tomorrow at nine a.m. Do not be late.
I scoff and open his alarm app, turning off the one set for eight in the morning. I put his phone back but don’t put it on charge, picking up his wallet and snooping through that as a last resort. There’s nothing in here either. Just a little cash and…
I blink and drop my elbows on my knees, my head lowered as I look at the pictures of him and my baby sister. My happy, grinning, laughing baby sister. Tears fill my eyes before I can stop it, and I lock my jaw, turning my face toward the boy sleeping next to me.
“I hate you so fucking much.”
11
NATE
“God fucking damn it.”
My lips twitch at the panic in his voice, my hands wrapped around my coffee cup as I sit next to Frankie at the kitchen island. Carter’s sitting opposite us, shirtless and hungover, head lowered as he inhales the breakfast I made this morning.
I couldn’t sleep last night. When I can’t sleep, I clean. And when there’s nothing left to clean, I cook as much food as I can so I can clean all over again.
My friends aren’t usually up before noon when we don’t have classes to get to, but every time I cook, it’s like they sense the food and come running for it.
Xavi finally appears at the bottom of the stairs. I watch through the doorway as he paces and rips his hands through his hair. It’s after nine already. His phone keeps ringing in his pocket, but he’s ignoring it. He looks a little crazed, barely sparing the three of us a glance as he walks into the kitchen and crouches down to look beneath the freezer.
“What’s wrong with you?” Carter asks around a mouthful of bacon.
“I—” Xavi stops and does a double take at me, his face falling as he slowly rises back up to his feet. “Nate…”
“Party boy.”
He curses and bangs the freezer door with the edge of his fist, making my sleepy girl best friend jump beside me. With her fork halfway to her mouth, Frankie lifts her eyes and looks between me and Xavi, not moving a muscle. Carter’s mouth stretches into a slow grin, but I don’t look away from the pissy little bitch behind him, dropping back in my seat as I watch the emotions flick across his face. I can almost hear the thoughts running through his head as he tries to fit the pieces together, his teeth grinding when he figures out what I’ve done.
That right there, I suddenly realize.
That’s what I want.
