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“I don’t really have a choice. Dad wants me to go. Make friends, be outside, experience the world,” he says, a bit of mocking sarcasm laced in his tone on the last one. There’s a shrug of indifference before he adds, “So I just go, even if none of those things happen.”
“You have friends, though,” I point out. Because I’ve seen him laugh and joke around with some of the other boys at lunch or during the activities. In fact, never once during this past week would I have thought he was the same kid Colin described to me on the first day.
A soft snort comes from him. “Maybe we get along, but those guys aren’t my friends.”
I bite my lip before hedging, “Parker and Ashton seem nice. They’re your bunkmates, right? And from what I understand, they’ve been coming here just as long as you have.”
This time I get another shrug. “I always feel like a third wheel because of their whole…twin bond thing.”
“What about Colton or Jordan or Bradley?” I ask, listing off a bunch of kids in our group. “I’ve seen you laughing and joking with them a few times.”
“They’re too sporty and outdoorsy.”
I know I shouldn’t laugh, but I can’t help the slight chuckle falling from my lips. “You’re at a wilderness summer camp, Eli. Isn’t that the entire point?”
“That is the point,” he says. “But I’m not. I’d rather spend my summer in my room—”
“If you say playing video games, I’m going to scream,” I cut in. To drive the point home, I open my mouth and suck in a deep breath, ready to let it rip.
He clamps his hand over my mouth, and for the first time since I’ve sat down beside him, a smile creeps into his expression. “Don’t tell me you’re one of those adults who hates video games.”
I laugh beneath his palm before pushing it from my face. “First of all, I’m not an adult. I might be old enough to be considered one, but I promise, I’m just as much of a kid as you are. And second, I love videogames. But those are for the rainy winter days, not the insanely nice weather we get during the summer.”
“Unless you’re someone who hates going outside. Then video games are great everyday.”
“Fair enough. But have you tried finding something out here that you do enjoy? Archery or the ropes course or scavenger hunts? Anything at all?”
“They're okay, but I don’t really like any of it.” His shoulders lift in another damn shrug before his voice comes out more lost and alone than I’ve ever heard it. “It makes me feel like I don’t belong here.”
I didn’t think it was possible for my heart to break for someone else, but here I am, feeling it all the same. And I hate it for him.
“You’re not alone in that feeling,” I muse more to myself than to him. “But you know what we gotta do in the moments where we don’t think we fit in?”
“I have a feeling go home isn’t the right answer,” he asks, a brow arched.
“Nice try.” I grin before bumping my shoulder against his. “Nah, kid. We just fake it ‘til we make it.”
He takes a second to mull it over before he taps his foot against mine.
“And how’s that working for you? Wearing boating shoes for hiking?” he says, his tone teasing. “I mean, c’mon. Who does that?”
I chuckle, shaking my head. “I never said I was good at faking it, okay? It’s a work in progress. But it’s getting easier every day, just like it will for you.”
Even with his nod of agreement, I can tell he’s not completely sold on the idea. We’ve got to start somewhere, though.
“Maybe you’re right.”
Our conversation fades, the sounds of nature taking the place of words instead. I’m not sure how long we stay wrapped in this tranquil bubble while looking out over the alpine lake. But I do know it’s the most at peace I’ve felt since arriving here.
The feeling doesn’t last much longer, though, because when I absently glance behind us, I spot Kaleb.
He’s walking down the path toward us, a mixture of relief and irritation written in his expression that’s visible even from this distance. The crease in his brow and slight frown etched at the corner of his lips makes it all too apparent he’s not happy to find Elijah and I here together.
Probably because I didn’t do the one thing I was supposed to: call back on the walkie-talkie if I found him.
“Elijah, you’re supposed to be up at the lodge for dinner right now,” he says as he reaches us, eyes locked on the kid beside me.
“I don’t want to eat up there,” Eli mutters beside me, kicking at the water absently. “I don’t want to be here at all.”
