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I knew this—vaguely—I just didn’t think it would take them multiple states away.
Now is he not only uprooting my plans, but Tillie’s too.
Not that the other dickheads here deserve her.
But still. She does well for herself here, despite not having a penis to wave around. She’s earned her respect. Maybe if she had a couple more years to prove herself, they’d even start listening to her, rather than just put up with her.
“I…I am still coming with you…right?” I ask quietly, finally giving voice to the worries thrashing around my skull.
Tillie’s blue eyes instantly widen as she starts shaking her head.
Well, fuck, I think with a wince, my vision blurring, much to my horror. Knew this was too good to be true.
“Aston, oh my God, no, that’s not—Of course you’re coming with us,” she’s quick to rush out, assuring me in a strong, adamant voice. “That’s not changing.”
Then in a move that startles as much as it surprises me, she reaches across the table, as if to grab for my hand. I’m sure it’s meant to be comforting, but it catches me off guard. So much so that I flinch back, nearly throwing myself out of my chair.
Her face bunches, almost like her feelings are hurt.
But I can’t exactly find it in me to care. Not when I’ve spent the last three months counting down the days to when I’d get to go live with her in the blue-shuttered house by the lake. One with a garden and a porch swing. I have pictures of it in my room, taped to my wall for me to look at when I’m too hyper to sleep.
It was supposed to be my house. My first real home. One that’s so much nicer-looking than anything I remember living in as a kid. And definitely nicer than this cold, sterile place, or the clinic I’ve been sent to for little vacations over the years. Med holidays is what my team of shrinks called it.
Once Tillie collects herself, she repeats more firmly, “Of course you’re still coming with us, Aston.” A beat passes. “Look, I know how much you were looking forward to living in that house…” She watches me closely. “But I think you’ll really love it here. You’ll still have your own room, and guess what? It even has its own attached bathroom.”
But this wasn’t the plan! I want to insist, digging my foot in the ground like I could keep myself from stomping like a toddler.
I barely hear her as I bite the inside of my cheek—hard. I don’t need her or anyone else to tell me how ridiculous I’m being. I know I am.
Her lips purse, telling me I’m not doing a very good job at containing my annoyance.
I screw my eyes shut, tight enough to see stars, and then take a deep breath in through my nose. Long and deep until I can’t take any more air in, and then I release it.
I can’t screw this up. Not now. Now when I’m so close, I can literally taste freedom on my tongue.
“It has a huge yard,” she says quietly. “Bigger than the one you would’ve had by the lake.”
Everything in me stills, even my thoughts.
Tillie, Tillie, Tillie…
Just when I think she’s finally going to disappoint me, she reminds me why she’s outlasted just about everyone else who’s tried to wiggle their way in.
When I open my eyes, I find hers twinkling back at me knowingly. “Even bigger than the one here.”
I eye her thoughtfully. “Really?” The one here is pretty fucking big, so…
She nods, smiling, like she knew all along that’s what it would take to win me over.
Bitch, I think, a smile twitching along my lips.
“There’s a creek, too, just along the far back of the property. Not quite the same as a lake, but…” She shrugs. “It’s quiet. Peaceful. Quieter than where we live now, even.”
It’s not like you were going to swim anyway, a dry voice reminds me. Unless I wanted to make a complete and utter fool out of myself.
Would be pretty hard to drown in a creek though. At least there’s that.
Biting her lip, Tillie hesitates before adding, “And I think…I think it might be good for you to, maybe, I don’t know”—her mouth ticks up ruefully—“go to school?”
