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“The fuck does it matter to you?” I shoved at his hand, but it was locked on tight.
“If you hate me, if you hate this town, then why the fuck are you here? Why did you open a restaurant down the street from me? Tell me why.”
The burning in my eyes was back; no amount of blinking would make it go away. I wanted to deck him, or scream at him, anything to get him to let go so I could go home and down a bottle of vodka and forget this whole fucking day had ever happened.
I managed to yank myself free before crossing my arms over my chest, glaring past his head. My reply came out croaky and thick, since my throat felt like it was closing with each passing second. “Because of your mom.”
“My mom?”
Rather than try and find the right words and run the risk of fucking everything up even more, I pulled out my wallet and untucked a pristine hundred-dollar bill. Heather’s perfect cursive covered the top in her favorite turquoise ink.
I’m so proud of you and everything you’ve done. This is just the beginning. Love, Mom.
His jaw shifted and flexed. I couldn’t tell if he was pissed that she called herself “Mom” to me or that I had the nerve to carry a piece of her around in my wallet.
“I don’t understand,” Alex whispered, handing the money back. “You saw her?”
“She found me in Chicago. Convinced me I should open my own restaurant. Then she gave me that and told me about some expo Middleton was having to try and bring in new businesses to the downtown area. That day in the grocery store? I was meeting with investors to see what needed to be done to get the restaurant open. Turned out there was no expo. It was just Heather. She knew that space was going to be available and got the landlord to give me a break.”
“She never said anything.” He blinked, hard, and let his gaze fall to the ground.
“Probably because she died… right after…” I slipped my wallet back into my pocket, feeling like even more of an asshole as I waited for the next battle to begin.
Alex didn’t skip a beat. His gaze snapped up again, eyes narrowed in a dark mixture of anger and sadness. “If you knew she died, then why didn’t you come to the funeral?”
“I did.” I swallowed thickly. “I just… came late. I saw you with your grandma and your cousins. Your family. I didn’t want to ruin that for you, especially after the last time…”
“You’re my family, idiot,” he said hotly, still glaring. “Why didn’t you see me after? It’s not like you didn’t know where the hell I was!”
I scoffed, hackles rising again in guilt and defensiveness. “Because I’m a fucking coward! Is that what you want to hear? You’re the better man, Alex. You always have been. And I couldn’t be rejected by you again. It hurt too fucking much the first time. You were already hurting. I didn’t want to fucking pile it on for you!”
“I never rejected you!”
“I gave my virginity to you and you wouldn’t even fucking look at me the next morning!”
He gaped at me. “You didn’t say anything! I didn’t know if you remembered or not! Even if you did, I thought you were ashamed! It’s like you were avoiding me and I didn’t want to make things worse for you!”
“Well, you did! And now you want to point the finger that I didn’t rush to your side the second I moved back? What about you? Huh? I damn near opened a restaurant in your fucking face and you couldn’t even be bothered to walk your happy little ass down here? Pick up a fucking phone? Shows how much I really mean to you.”
He move forward so quickly I took a step back. Instead of punching me, he cupped my face between his hands and kissed me. When he finally pulled away, he swept his thumb across my damp cheekbone. “I love you, you stubborn asshole. And I did walk over here. I was here for your grand opening. And I’ve ordered your blackberry crepes at least once a week ever since.”
My chest squeezed. “No powdered sugar and an orange juice to go?”
He smiled and nodded. “I thought you wanted to be left alone, so that’s what I did. Except now I see what an idiot I was. I should have fought harder for you. And I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Aaron.”
“I’m sorry too.” I pressed my lips to his, kissing him fervently despite my tears. Although at one point I wasn’t sure they were entirely mine. “I shouldn’t have been such an asshole. I should—”
He kissed me again, slipping one hand to the back of my neck and pulling me closer. “Can we finish this inside? I don’t know about you, but I’m freezing.”
I shook my head. “I just want to go home. I’ll worry about the rest of that shit tomorrow,” I said, waving a hand toward the restaurant.
“Do you want to come to my place?”
“I don’t even know where your place is.”
His hopeful smile brightened as he squeezed my hand. “Yeah, you do. Come on.”
6
