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I dared to open my eyes to see my mum tugging my aunt up and out of the booth. She shot me a look as they disappeared around the corner, and I knew exactly what she was trying to convey.
She knew that I wanted Ander, and she wanted me to go for it.
If only it were that easy. But nothing about Ander Loveridge was fucking easy.
Lost in my thoughts, it took me a few minutes to notice that Ander had remained still and silent at my side. I chanced a look at him, noticing the way he was staring into the distance, his bottom lip tugged between his teeth, a frown pulling his brows together.
“Ander, is everything okay?”
He didn’t even appear to have heard me.
“Ander?” Shifting to face him fully, I squeezed his thigh gently. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
His head turned, and he blinked slowly. Releasing his lip from between his teeth, he slid his tongue across it, leaving it full and glistening and so, so tempting.
Tearing my gaze away from his lips was a struggle, but when I dragged it up to his eyes, my heart stuttered. Fuck.He was looking at my mouth. I wasn’t imagining it. What did it mean?
“Ander,” I whispered.
His eyes met mine, and they were so dark.
“Pretend with me,” he rasped, low and hoarse, and then he kissed me.
15
This was what I’d been searching for. Except it was more because this time, I wasn’t doing it as a favour to a friend. I was kissing Elliot for one reason only.Because I wanted to kiss him.
His lips parted, allowing my tongue entry, and I slowly traced it across his lips, then slid it against his. He moaned softly, the sound going straight to my cock, which was already half-hard, thanks to the proximity of his hand to it. But at that moment, all I was interested in was having my mouth on his for as long as he’d let me.
Fucking hell. The way he kissed was so addictive. He was already deepening the kiss, his free hand coming up to my face, his fingers stroking over my skin. We kissed for what felt like hours, everything else sliding into insignificance. There could’ve been a fire alarm going off, or even an alien invasion, but the only thing that mattered to me was Elliot’s mouth on mine.
When he finally pulled back, my heartbeat was going fucking crazy, and I couldn’t catch my breath. All I could do was stare at his kiss-swollen lips, wishing I could kiss him again.
He sighed, swiping his hand across his face. “Ander…we shouldn’t have done that.”
I knew he was right. It wasn’t fair of me to kiss him that way, especially when everything with Curtis had only just happened. Fuck, his face from that night still haunted me. I hated seeing him so upset.
“I know. You’re right,” I said eventually, and it was the hardest sentence to force out because I had a sneaking suspicion that I might have less than platonic reasons for wanting to kiss my pretend-for-the-night boyfriend.
That was a thought that needed a lot of caution and a lot of time to process. If I was developing feelings for my best friend, then I could end up irrevocably fucking up the most important relationship in my life if I took a wrong step.
But the only thing on my mind at that point was kissing him again.
And getting those legs wrapped around me.
And dropping to my knees and sucking his—
Fuck.
Fucking fuck. This was worse than I’d realised.
While I was having my fucking existential crisis, or whatever it was called, Elliot was watching me silently, his gaze inscrutable. Was he pissed off that I’d kissed him? Worried that we were fucking up our friendship? Relieved that we’d stopped? I couldn’t get a read on him.
He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly through his nose, and then his eyes met mine. “Fuck it,” he muttered, grabbing my hand. “Come on.”
I let him lead me through the bar until we were outside. The sudden cold was a shock to my system, especially combined with the winter sea breeze, which felt like hundreds of tiny ice needles stabbing at my skin. Elliot didn’t stop, dragging me around the corner of the building, where immediately we were more sheltered. The wind dropped, and I took a breath.
“Ace,” he murmured, and then he was crowding me against the wall, and his lips were on mine again.
