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“I know, that’s why I suggested it. If I drive up early in the morning, we can have the whole day there, then drive home in the evening.”
“I’d love that.” With a smile, I curled my legs up under me on the sofa. “And maybe when I’m back at home, you, me, and Joe could do a day in London to see the lights?”
His own smile dropped as he considered his next words. “Yeah, I’ll see if I can talk Joe into it. I think we need to stay out of the house as much as possible. Dad’s getting worse lately. I dunno if it’s work pressure or what, but he’s on a really short fuse now.”
“Has he been hurting you?” I whispered. When the silence stretched, I prompted, “Tim? Talk to me, please.”
He sighed, running a hand through his tousled red hair. “There’s no point in talking about it. I don’t want you to be worrying about this when you’re away at school. I can handle myself, I promise. And once you’re legally an adult and can move out, we’re all gonna move out, okay? You, me, and Joe. We’ll find a place together or something. Even if Dad doesn’t approve, I don’t care. I know Joe has some…ideas about you finding a husband, like Dad expects, but I know that the two of us can convince him that it’s better to wait.” Pausing, he turned his head, his eyes meeting mine. “You should be free to live your life, Fal.”
“I want that for you, too. I hate the thought of you being stuck here. You know I never wanted to leave you guys, but I thought that it meant we’d all get a break from Dad’s punishments, at least. If he’s punishing you even when I’m not here…” Tears filled my eyes. “I can’t bear the thought of you getting hurt.”
“I promise I can handle it.” Moving the bowl of popcorn to the coffee table, he slipped his arm around me. “Please don’t cry. It’s okay.
I sniffed, blinking rapidly in an attempt to keep my tears at bay. “I just wish there was something I could do. I feel so…so…helpless.”
He pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “We’ll be away from this soon. Even if Joe ends up under Dad’s thumb, I’ll make sure that you and me get away, okay? We haven’t got long to wait now. You’ll be finished with school forever by next summer. You’ll be over eighteen then, and we’ll be free.”
His words gave me some comfort, but I knew that the odds of our father allowing us to just walk away were slim. He was someone who was prepared to play dirty, and he liked to be in control. If we threatened that, I knew he’d come down hard on us.
But we would try. And I knew that it meant I’d have to come clean to Tim about Zayde. If, against all odds, we did manage to get out from under our father’s thumb, then maybe, just maybe, there was a tiny chance that I didn’t have to give him up. But only if I could make Tim understand how much he meant to me.
My mind was made up. I’d talk to Tim. I’d have to discuss it with Zayde first, and I needed to work out exactly what I was going to say. But I needed to take the time to sit down with Tim and do my best to explain how important Zayde was in my life, and I needed to do it before I finished school for good.
“Tim?”
“Yeah?”
“Not this weekend…but maybe at Christmas, can we talk? There…there’s something I need to tell you. Something really important, and I—I don’t know if you’re going to like it. But I really want you to understand.”
He drew back from me, his gaze searching. “You know you can tell me anything, right? I’ll never judge you.”
I nodded. “I know.”
Whatever he saw in my gaze must have reassured him. His shoulders relaxed, and he shot me a small grin. “C’mon, then. No more depressing talk, okay? We’ve got a few hours until Elijah and Jason come over, and I wanna spend them with my favourite sister.”
I returned his smile, some of the weight lifting from my shoulders. “Your only sister.”
“Still my favourite. Just like we know I’m your favourite brother. We won’t tell Joe.” He shot me an exaggerated wink, his grin widening as he dug back into his popcorn.
Shaking my head, I turned my attention back to the TV. No matter how awful our parents could be, somehow I’d ended up with the best siblings I could hope for and a boyfriend who I knew loved me more than anything, even though the words were too hard for him to say aloud.
SIX
Joseph and Tim had disappeared, and I was alone in the house. I needed to think of somewhere to go before my parents got back. Hailey wasn’t answering her phone, and both Zayde and my brothers had made me promise to stay away from whatever they were doing for Halloween night. As for other friends…I guess I didn’t really have any of those around here anymore. The “friends” I’d had when I was little had mostly consisted of children from families that my parents deemed suitable. It had all been shallow, superficial children thrown together because their parents thought it would be advantageous in one way or another. It was attending parties that I couldn’t stand, where I was forced to look and behave a certain way, in the hope that I’d make the right connections for the future.
A memory struck me then. I’d been ten, and it was back when Zayde was living with his mum, back when we were blissfully ignorant of the things to come.
Lying on the grass, I closed my eyes against the bright sun. Zayde was letting me rest my head in his lap while he listened to music through his headphones and I made a daisy chain. His mum was here cleaning, but we were out of sight of the main house, hidden behind the wooden summer house halfway down the garden. My dad and brothers were out, and my mum was napping, as she often seemed to do in the afternoons. For now, it was just me and him, on our own in this quiet, sunny space. We were hiding out of the way because we both knew my family wouldn’t approve of me associating with the son of their cleaner. It was so stupid. Zayde was the best person I knew. Who cared if he wasn’t rich?
My fingers faltered on the stem of a daisy, and I carefully lowered the chain to the ground. Bringing my hand up to shade my eyes from the sun, I looked up at Zayde. “I have to go to a stupid party with my family later, and I don’t want to go. I wish you could be there.”
He cocked his head as he stared down at me. Pulling his headphones from his ears, he said, “Did you say you wished I could go to a party with you?”
“Uh-huh.”
“I don’t like parties. Especially not the kind of parties your family goes to.” Clearing his throat, he affected a ridiculous accent, his lips curving up as he spoke. “You can’t drink all the champagne, sir! Have some caviar instead.”
“What?” I scrambled to a sitting position, facing him, laughter bubbling up inside me. “What was that?” I managed to wheeze out, laughing harder as his eyes danced with amusement.
