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Linda starts by handing me a blouse, a dress, and a pair of pants. I quickly try on each item and walk out of the changing room for her to assess how they fit. Once done with that, she ushers me to a tufted white chair.
“Here, sit here so we can try on some shoes.”
I sit down and pull off my old shoes. Linda has me try on every kind of shoe—ankle boots, peep-toe flats, heels, wedged sandals, wedges, and even go-go boots that make me feel like a teenager again.
A glance at the price tag of the dress I’m wearing tells me it’s a little over three hundred dollars. I’m sure the shoes will be triple that, if not more. I can’t stop staring at the price tag. This is too much. It’s too much for someone to spend on me. I should refuse to take it, but I don’t have any other options right now, either. Unless I want to wear moldy clothes or be naked. Plus, Phoenix will hate me for rejecting his offer. I don’t have many options right now.
Linda checks her phone. “Okay, so I found a lot on his list, but not everything. I’ll have to get the rest of the items elsewhere and have them delivered to Olympus. We don’t carry toiletry items here, but I’ll still get the best on Heathens Hollow and have them delivered as well.”
I run my fingers through my hair and take a deep breath.
“Are you okay?” Linda asks. “You’re very quiet.”
“I’m fine.” I force a smile. “It’s just a little overwhelming.”
“Overwhelming?” Linda’s eyes widen.
My face is getting warm. “I’m not used to this kind of treatment.”
“Oh well,” Linda says. “This is how Phoenix shops. He texts me a list of what he wants, and I have it sent to Olympus. It’s fast and furious, but it works for him.”
I nod and smile. I guess it does work for him. For someone who’s used to having everything handed to him, I’m sure it does. Yet, it feels weird to me because I’ve never had anything like this before. I’m not used to someone buying me things, especially something as expensive as these clothes. I don’t know what to say. “Thank you” doesn’t seem like enough.
Linda turns to me. “Okay, that’s it for now. It was nice meeting you, Ani. I will have all of these items delivered to the manor immediately.”
I appreciate that there is no judgment in her eyes. No assumptions made. Linda is simply doing her job and assisting Phoenix with his needs. I must admit this has been the easiest shopping experience ever. I also have no idea what I actually got to wear.
I give my thanks and exit to join Phoenix in the car. Everything has happened in such a blur that I don’t even know how long I was inside. The rain is letting up a little, but I still run to the car to try to avoid getting completely soaked.
“Did you get everything you needed?” Phoenix asks as I climb inside.
“I think so. Linda said she’ll have it all delivered.”
Phoenix nods as he signals for the driver to leave. He seems calmer now. Less sweaty. It seems some time alone is just what he needed.
“Thank you,” I say, though I feel I owe him more than just a simple word.
On Heathens Hollow, the Godwins are known for sponsoring charities, donating to causes, and paying their fair share of money to help the community. Although, I’ve never actually seen a physical Godwin at any of the events or handing the money over in person. It’s always felt like something they just do because they are rich. Not because they want to or care deeply about the cause or the charity they are funding. I’ve never really seen kindness from a Godwin before other than on a surface level.
Until now.
“Can I ask you something?” Phoenix eventually asks. “Why would you allow yourself to settle for that? To settle on a man who gives you that kind of life? You seem like such a strong-willed woman. You don’t seem… broken.”
“I’m not broken,” I respond a little too quickly and defensively, but I inhale deeply and try to give an answer. It’s the least I can do for someone who is going out of their way to help me. “I’m not a victim, but I am really fucking stubborn. And I guess I didn’t want to give up. I didn’t want to admit defeat.”
“Why would you want to be with a man like…”
“Mark.”
“Why would you be with a man who has you living like that? With a man who beats you?”
Looking out the window at the gray skies, the rain letting up, I say, “Daphne and I grew up with a very neglectful father. Poor would be an understatement to describe our upbringing. I guess you could say I struggled to break the cycle. Daphne was able to do it her way, but that was not the path I chose. When I first met Mark, he offered me something I found very attractive in a man. He was dominant, possessive, and swore he would love me forever and never let me go. I found it sexy and thought that it was everything I wanted and needed. It’s still what I want and need. But… I didn’t care about money if the man could make me feel protected and nurtured. But I misjudged all the qualities I thought I wanted in him. He didn’t have any of them. He was just an ass.”
