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There’s no baby yet. He hasn’t even tried.
But where I once was terrified of the idea, I can’t wait. I want that bond between us. I want that connection. I want more than what we have now. I want so much more.
“Are you a good girl or a bad girl?” Phoenix asks as he had grown accustomed to asking all the mornings he arrives in a new crisp suit with an unbuttoned white shirt at the neck.
“What do you want me to be?” I answer like I always do right before he takes his belt and runs it along my punished, upturned flesh after he has spanked me.
“Today I want you to be bad. I want you to talk dirty to me so I can punish that mouth of yours,” Phoenix says.
I turn my head just enough to see him towering over me as I am bent over the bed and give a wicked smirk. “Fuck you, sir. Fuck you.”
We played this game in the past. He forces me to act out just so he can punish me more severely.
Phoenix seems to like it most when I punch or kick, and especially when I call him names. My mock hatred of him seems to fuel him, though we both know it is all for show. He knows how desperate I am for more. He can see the arousal coating my pussy and dampening my inner thighs. He wipes at my tears of frustration as my stomach tightens and cramps from a growing need for release never to be granted. He makes promises that if I am a good girl, that maybe someday I will get a taste of his cock.
His torturous edging is my true punishment. Being taken to the edge only to be pulled back from the jagged ledge is the penance for my lies.
He lets me get so close, but not close enough.
I want a taste so badly.
I don’t know what he is doing to me, and if this is his ultimate goal. He has turned the tables. He doesn’t want me but makes damn sure I wanted him. My entire being knows this is wrong. It’s a sickness rooted deep inside of me. I feel shame for my desire. I loathe that instead of trying to escape, I plot how I can tempt him to claim my body. I hate how I hunger, but I hate not having my needs met even more.
I’m not sure how many days or how many nights pass, but Phoenix has changed the woman I once was. He has broken down my walls and left me wide open for the taking. My battle scars are left without bandages, and Phoenix only opens the wounds wider.
“You have a filthy mouth, my dove,” he says as he heads out of the hallway toward the bathroom.
I hold my position bent over the bed I have recently earned as a comfort item, schooled in what will happen if I act of my own free will without permission.
“I think it’s time I teach you what happens to girls with dirty, filthy mouths,” he says as he disappears from my sight.
My pussy throbs at the warning in his voice. I have no idea what he has in store, and though I am sure parts of me will hate every moment of what Phoenix has planned for this morning’s session, other more sinful parts of me will love every second of his evil ministrations to my body, mind, and soul.
“Kneel,” he commands as he reenters the bedroom with something fisted in one hand, and a glass of water in the other.
I quickly do as he asks, licking my lips in anticipation of what’s to come. A chance to earn more comfort items—items I have long lost count of. I no longer pay my penance for these items. No. I pay my penance for Phoenix. For the one day he will deem me worthy of his cock being buried inside of me.
There was a time in my life where I would have screamed and shouted at any woman who would submit to a man. Especially to a man as strict and severe as Phoenix. Mark abused me, but I never submitted. Never gave in. Never surrendered my soul, even if my body was battered because of it. My heart never belonged to Mark. My body never came alive with his dominance. But with Phoenix…
With Phoenix… I no longer care. Societal rules ceased existing the minute I walked through the doors of the manor. Life as it once was, no longer exists for me. My nightmare has become a fantasy, and my fantasies have become this nightmare.
“It’s time I teach you a lesson,” he says as he stands before me, places the water by my knees as well as a bar of soap, and unfastens his pants. When his hard cock pops out from its constraints, he says, “It’s time I clean that mouth of yours out.”
