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When we got to the drop-off area at Philly International, Holden towered over me as he enveloped my body in his. The hair not covered by his beanie was blowing in the wind.
“Your visit went by way too fast.” I spoke into his chest. “I wish so badly that you didn’t have to leave.”
“I can’t even begin to express how much I wish the same, sweetheart. This fucking sucks.”
I looked up at him. “If my mother continues to get better, I’m gonna go back to New York in a few days.”
“Okay.” He squeezed me tighter. “Call me day or night. Seriously, Lala. You’re my priority. None of the other shit matters right now.”
“Knock ’em dead tonight at the show. I’ll be thinking of you.”
“I’ll be thinking of you every fucking second.” Holden lifted me up in grand fashion.
I giggled at the gesture.
He looked into my eyes and said, “I…” He hesitated as he put me down.
My heartbeat sped up…
“I’m gonna miss you so fucking much,” he finally said.
And just like that, my heart deflated.
***
A few days later, I was at my parents’ house packing my things. Since my mother was set to be discharged soon, I was clear to return to New York.
It was a huge relief that Mom was going to be okay, and I was so grateful that I’d been able to be here, even if I was now super behind with my research project. Ultimately, that didn’t matter. Nothing mattered more than family.
My father appeared at the doorway to my bedroom. “Can I come in?”
“Sure.” I put down the shirt I’d folded. “I didn’t know you were here.”
“Just came home to grab a few things and stock the fridge.” He went silent for a bit as he watched me pack. “How long have you been messing around with Holden Catalano?”
I froze. “Why are you asking me that?”
“I saw him with his arms around you that first day he showed up at the hospital, Lala. But more than that, I’m not stupid. You don’t think I’m able to put two and two together? You end your engagement to a great guy. You live next door to Holden. He randomly shows up at the hospital and just so happens to be in town. Do you think your dad is blind?”
I exhaled. “Okay. Yes, Holden and I have been seeing each other.” Admitting that felt like a huge weight had been lifted.
He raised a brow. “Are you telling me you left Warren for him?”
“No. I mean, Holden might have been a mitigating factor, but I ended my engagement because I wasn’t ready to be tied down, Dad. Plain and simple. Holden and I are just…having fun right now. Seeing where things go.”
“Jesus, Laney. I don’t have to tell you why this sounds like a really bad idea.”
“I know you have preconceived notions about him, Dad. But Holden and I care about each other. I can’t say with a hundred-percent certainty that I know where it’s going, but I trust him. He’s not gonna hurt me.”
“I know he was a damn good friend to your brother. But his reputation certainly precedes him. I just hope you know what you’re doing.”
“I don’t know what I’m doing exactly.” I laughed. “But right now, I’m happy. In a different way than I’ve ever been happy before. I feel…” I paused. “Alive.”
He nodded. “Well, then I have to accept that.”
The doorbell rang, interrupting our conversation.
“Are you expecting someone?” I asked.
“No.”
Dad and I walked together to the front door.
When he opened it, I saw Warren standing there, wearing a short-sleeve collared shirt and a bow tie.
“Hi, Bill. Just came to say goodbye to Laney before I have to head to work.”
My father stepped aside. “Come on in, son.”
“Hey.” I waved.
“Hi.” A look of sadness crossed Warren’s face.
My father grabbed his keys. “I’ll, uh, give you guys some privacy. I need to get to the market and pick up some things before Mom comes home anyway. I’ll be back in time to see you off, honey.”
“Okay, Dad.”
After my father left, I looked up at Warren, who was twiddling his thumbs nervously.
“You seem preoccupied. Is everything okay?” I asked.
“No,” he said. “Things really aren’t okay, Laney.”
“Come sit.”
He took a seat across from me on the couch in the living room.
“Talk to me, Warren.”
“Well…” He sighed. “I got it—the job in California.”
“You did?” I smiled. “That’s amazing!”
There wasn’t a shred of joy on his face. “Is it?”
“Yes.”
“This might be the opportunity of a lifetime. But if it meant us getting back together, I would turn it down in a heartbeat. I know you never wanted to move out there. And you mean more to me than a job.”
My chest constricted. “You need to take it.”
He hung his head. “I guess I know what that means.”
My voice shook. “I’m so sorry, Warren.”
