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“I love you, Laiken,” he says softly, pressing a kiss into my hair.
My stomach flips in the best way. “I love you, too.”
I know without a doubt that I’m always going to remember the night he threw caution to the wind and then made love to me under the stars on our special beach.
And if in the morning, we go skinny dipping just to fuck in the water again…well, that’s just how it goes when you’re young and in love.
My momalways used to tell me that when there is a fork in the road, make your decisions wisely. Think things through, trust your gut, and act accordingly. Well, I didn’t do that. I chose my friendship with Cam over my relationship with Laiken out of fear.
Fear that Cam would hate me.
Fear that I will never be good enough for her.
Fear that I was destined to be just like my father.
I chose the wrong road and lost the one girl who means more to me than anyone. So, I turned the fuck around and chose again.
Every part of me meant what I said when I told Laiken that I don’t regret it. Idon’t. There have been hookups in my life, girls I flirted with, and even someone I thought that I liked at one point. But there has never been anyone like her. She’s that once in a lifetime kind of person for me, and it reached a point where I knew that if I let her slip away, I’d live in constant regret.
But it still hurts as Cam hits the fuck-you button for the third time today.
“Hey, it’s Cam. Leave—” His voicemail starts to play, and I hang up.
It’s not like I blame him for not talking to me. If the situation were reversed and I found out he was fucking Devin, I probably would have stabbed him. Does that make me a hypocrite? Absolutely. But I can’t change it now, and I wouldn’t if I could.
I toss my phone on my bed and rub my hands over my face. There’s no point in texting him—they just go unanswered. Well, except for the one. Though I’m not sure a single middle finger emoji really counts as a response.
Exhaling slowly, I get up and head toward the bathroom. I have to take a shower before work, and responsibilities don’t stop because your best friend would rather eat glass than talk to you. At least there’s hockey practice tonight. I’ll try talking to him there.
EVERYTHING FEELS OFF. NOTin the way that it did when Laiken wouldn’t talk to me—that was worse. But still off. Like pieces of my life aren’t in the right place. I don’t have someone sending me random hockey videos throughout the day or asking me which breakfast shake looks better.
Neither. They all taste like chalk.
Honestly, in all the time I’ve known Cam, I don’t think we’ve ever gone this long without at least sending a text or two throughout the day. The summer before I turned sixteen, we spent every single day together. Either he was with me at my house, or I was with him at his. But I don’t think we spent more than a couple hours apart. Looking back on it now, I’m surprised we didn’t kill each other.
There were so many things different about that summer compared to this one—the biggest being the fact that Laiken hated my guts. It lasted a couple years, actually. See, Cam and I weren’t always friends. That happened because of a girl, I guess you could say.
I was the new kid. My parents moved Devin and me here under the guise of wanting us to go to a better school and be closer to the beach. In reality, my mom was just trying to get my dad away from his drinking buddies. Devin absolutely hated it, though what girl wouldn’t? She had gone to the same gymnastics studio since she was three. Grew up with all the same girls. And then she was ripped away from it all.
Me? I didn’t really care so much. My only concern was finding out where the closest ice rink was and seeing what kind of team they had. The NHL was my dream, but when your dad walks out the door without even a goodbye, hopes and dreams are the first things to go. This, however, was before. When everything was still…normal.
Being the new kid in school, you always seem to get the most attention. Guys want to know what your deal is, and girls want to find out if you’re datable. And one girl in particular was more interested than the rest. She invited me to be her date for her sister’s Sweet Sixteen, and I had no reason to say no.
I didn’t find out she had already asked Cam and then canceled to go with me instead until he came up to me out of nowhere and shoved me against my locker.
The two of us went at it, throwing punches and taking each other to the ground. No one tried to stop us; they just crowded around and watched as we beat the shit out of each other. To this day, I don’t think either of us knows who won that fight. By the end of it, we were both sucking in air like we were dying and throwing punches that barely made contact, let alone did any damage.
Finally, with the most respect I’ve ever had for anyone, we shook hands and walked away. The girl ended up not having a date to her sister’s party after I told her to fuck off. She tried going back to Cam, but he wasn’t interested either. And he and I somehow became friends.
But to Laiken, I was the guy who gave her brother a fat lip, and she hated me for it. It didn’t matter that we were friends, or that not even Cam’s parents cared much about the fight. After all, he started it. But Laiken cared.
And while she glared at me like she wanted to set me on fire and watch me burn, all I wanted was to see her smile. She’s always had such a pretty smile.
“H,” Laiken says, snapping her fingers in my face.
I jump as she gets my attention. “I didn’t even hear you walk in.”
She leans over the counter and kisses me hello. “I’m not surprised. You were really zoned out. You okay?”
