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“I didn’t mean to make things worse,” I say quietly. “But I had to know he was okay.”

“How’d you even know he was in the hospital to begin with?”

I repeat the same lie I told Hayes. “They called me. We’re still married which makes me his next of kin.”

But while Hayes’s brain might not be so clear after the accident, Cam’s is sharp as a tack. “How did they have your new phone number?”

Fuck. “I gave it to them. Called after I left to update it, in case of an emergency.”

His brows furrow. “So, you couldn’t bother to tell anyone where you were going, but you thought to call the hospital in casetheyneeded to reach you?”

Letting out a heavy exhale, I stare back at him. “It’s not that I forgot to tell anyone where I was or was too lazy to. I purposely didn’t tell anyone so none of you would come find me.”

“How disgustingly selfish of you,” he sneers. “Mom and Dad really raised a winner.”

Well, this is fun. If I had known coming back here would be this painful, I would’ve done it sooner.

But the worst part is, I get it. I understand all of it. Every word that Hayes and Cam have throw at me like knives—they’re all things I’ve thought about myself. Just not for the same reasons.

They think I’m a selfish bitch for leaving.

But I’m a selfish bitch for not listening to Hayes about Monty in the first place. For honestly believing that Hayes was simply paranoid and possessive. If only I had listened to him from the start. I’d have the perfect life I still dream about from time to time.

“I’m sorry,” I tell him. “Seriously, I’m really sorry for hurting you, and for hurting him. That wasn’t my intention. But don’t worry, I’m leaving tonight, and I won’t come back again. My life here is gone. I know that.”

He shakes his head, “That’s the thing. You can’t leave.”

“What?”

“I need you to stay,” he says, then corrects himself. “Hayesneeds you to stay.”

My eyes widen, and the hope that swells in my chest really needs to stop. “He couldn’t even look at me earlier. What do you mean heneedsme to stay?”

Cam comes around the bar and sits on one of the stools, rubbing his hands over his face. “He’s spiraling, Lai. He’s shutting everyone out and making reckless choices. I mean, he knew he shouldn’t be going that fast on the motorcycle, but he did it anyway.”

He looks so genuinely worried about him that it makes my chest hurt. “I heard you and Mali arguing at the hospital. You might lose the bar?”

He nods sullenly. “I found a stack of bills from recently, all past due. Some are even threatening cancelation. The vendor contracts, the taxes…it’s all in jeopardy. If I had to guess, I’d say he hasn’t been paying the bills for about six months now. The taxes for longer.”

“That doesn’t sound like Hayes. Or at least not the Hayes I knew.”

A hum vibrates in the back of his throat. “That’s the thing, he’snotthe Hayes you knew. He’s not the Hayes thatIknew. And it wasn’t until I called his mom on the way back from the hospital that I figured out why.”

He starts to tear up, and there aren’t many times I’ve seen my brother cry. He’s an emotional brick wall. So, to see him so affected by this, I know it can’t be good.

“She’s dying, Lai,” he tells me, and my chest cracks wide open. “She’s had cancer for the last year, and I thought it was getting better. He made it sound like she was going to be okay, but she told me tonight that they put her on hospice yesterday.”

My fist presses against my mouth as I start to cry. “No. She can’t…”

He nods. “I know, but she is. He’s trying to handle it all by himself, but he can’t. It’s too much. He may think he’s superman or some shit but he’s not. When she dies, it’s going to break him. And I think you might be the only chance we have of not losing him completely to this.”

I feel nauseous. Literally. Could throw up at any moment. “H-he doesn’t want me here. Trust me, Cam, you didn’t see the way he looked at me earlier. I’m thelastperson he wants to see.”

But Cam isn’t hearing any of it as he shakes his head. “He might think that now, but you’re the only person he ever wants to see. He wouldn’t have looked for you for so long if he didn’t want to see you.”

Right. The first six months I was gone. It’s the reason I sent such a detailed letter to my parents. I was trying to assure everyone that I was okay, especially Hayes, and show him that he wasn’tmeantto find me. But he didn’t let up. And the day finally came when Mali told me I needed to call him.

It was the hardest phone call I’ve ever had to make.

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