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“Just stabby stab. Not that hard.”
“Sounds quite hard to me!”
“Make sure it kills him. You don’t want him coming back for you, you know? One and done. The jolting of the car will be enough for you to take out the second man while he’s startled.”
“Or maybe not?” I ask desperately.
“Is it the throat that is the issue? Go for the eye, then. It’s a little gooier but with good results.”
I pass the phone to Lex. “My mom wants to talk to you about the surprise party.”
“I love surprise parties… wait… I don’t think you’re supposed to know about surprise parties,” Lex says as he takes it, then listens for a minute before quickly handing the phone back with a “Hell, nah.”
“Hey, Mom. I hope you came up with a better idea.”
Deus sighs loudly. “What else is in the back seat that could be of use?”
“I guess for my birthday I’d want… I don’t know. Some paper? And a bag… that’s it.”
“Oh yes, why don’t you give them a papercut? Is that much more up your alley? Do you need me to tell you how that works?” he asks withsomuch sarcasm. It’s clear I’ve disappointed my new friend with my lack of murdering capabilities.
“You know being a smartass gets you nowhere in life,” I growl.
“Stab the motherfucker. Stab stab.”
“I just… don’tlovethat idea, you know?” I ask. “I’m not like you.”
“We all start somewhere,” he says.
“Do we?” I ask curiously.
“Hey, I was seven when I killed my first target, so at least you’ll pop your murder cherry before you’re thirty.”
“My…excuse me?” I growl, realizing I’d almost repeated that out loud. I’m going to get killed well before the abductors even try their hand at killing me.
“Okay, I’m going to send you a video. Watch it closely.”
“Alright,” I say as I wait until the video comes in to watch. Lex leans in as we both observe Deus wrap the seat belt around Ellison’s throat so fucking quickly that I can’t even decipher how he did it. Ellison, clearly not aware this is going to happen, flails and twists around like a wild animal while Deus holds him tight.
“I think… I think he uses this hand here,” Lex says.
“No, no, no, if you do that, they can just slip out of it, right?”
“Ohhh, I see what you’re saying. Oh! That’s why he’s pushing his head to the side, so he can’t get his arm under it to lock it in.”
“Ahhhhh…” I return to the call. “Why the fuck did you do it so fast? How the hell are we supposed to learn if you move so fast we can’t even follow?”
“I don’t know how to do it slow!” Deus says.
“Dear god. Fine. I will do this.”
“Okay. Mommy says good luck,” Deus says. “Remember, if you don’t kill them, they can keep following.”
“Got it.” I turn to Lex. “Same time, okay?”
“Yep,” Lex says.
As the car starts to drift to a stop near a stoplight, I look to Lex and use my fingers to count down. The moment it hits three, I reach forward, grab the seat belt, and wrap it around Ned’s neck as Lex tries it with his guy. The only issue he wasn’t counting on was that his guy took that very moment to lean forward, out of Lex’s reach.
