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“Jake run back to his car and use the car phone! Call a fucking ambulance!” Tyson yells and pushes me aside. Pulling the shirt that is soaked and up against her pale skin back. I look down in shock and realize that she’s just wearing a bra, and every part of her abdomen, waist, and hips are drenched in her blood. Where the hell is all the blood coming from? “Fuck, she’s bleeding out, and I’m not sure she’s breathing!” Tyson shoves me hard. “Get it together, Jaxon! Put pressure on her wounds to slow the bleeding while I start CPR.”
My mind is slow to process his commands, and he shoves me hard once again, forcing my hands to hold the balled-up soaked fabric at her side. I watch in horror as he removes his own shirt and wraps it around her bleeding arm tightly.
I shake my head to clear the fog and watch as he starts compressions on my wife’s chest, counting loudly before tilting her head, checking her airway, and then giving her mouth-to-mouth. I want to be enraged that he has his lips over hers. That he’s shirtless, and her blood is streaked across his skin, but I am so scared right now. I just want her breathing; I just want him to tell me she is still alive.Is she alive?She has to be; there is no world that I can live in without her. The fates would not be that cruel, giving her to me and then taking her from me before we even had a chance.
My head tilts to the side, and I see blood streaks across the pale carpet next to her. At first, my mind can’t make out what it’s seeing. There’s so much blood underneath her and on her. Then slowly, the shapes seem to form into words, and I realize it’s a message. A message for me streaked in my wife’s blood.
The words cause both a thrill to enter my soul and terror to fill my heart. She knew she was dying and wrote those words in her own blood, with fear that she would never get to speak them to me in person. Sweat breaks out all over my body, and a furious roar leaves me sounding like a wounded wolf, one that has lost his mate.
NO! I refuse to lose her, not now, not fucking ever. She is mine, and I will follow her into hell & fight the devil for her.I can’t fucking breathe; my chest feels like it’s caving in on itself, and I can hear my blood rushing loudly in my ears. Saliva pools in my mouth, and I feel like I might just get sick. Every part of my body is trembling, snot, and tears sliding down my face.I can’t lose her, please; I can’t lose her!
I watch as Tyson repeats the process over and over again, time seeming to slow to a fucking crawl as I hold tightly to the wound on her side and do something I haven’t done since I was a little boy and my mother was dying.I pray.I pray to a God I’m not sure I believe in and promise him anything that he wants if he lets her live. If he will just give her back to me.Please, I can’t live without her.
“Ambulance is on their way, two minutes out. I left the door wide open and cleared what I could from the stairs.” Jake rushes back into the room, but I can’t look away from Stella and the compressions Tyson is performing on her chest.Breathe, baby, please, just breathe, I beg.
Loud voices fill the space, and a stranger tries to pull me away from Stella’s side. I react by throwing my fist at him before Jake yanks me back and restrains me. “Let him do his job, Jaxon; he’s trying to save her!” I watch as the paramedic takes over for Tyson, checking Stella’s vitals. He removes the bloody shirt and tries to clean the wound before placing gauze on it and wrapping it painfully tight, lifting her upper body to wrap it securely around her. She’s limp in his grasp, her head tilting on her neck like a rag doll.Holy fuck, is she even breathing? Please, God, please let her be breathing!
“She’s breathing, but barely. We gotta go now.” You! Are you the next of kin?” He directs his question to Tyson, and finally, my senses return to me.
“I’m her husband!” I shout and pull away from Jake’s grasp. “Okay, let’s go; you’re going to put pressure on the wound while we get her on the stretcher and down the stairs. Do not stop, press hard, don’t worry about hurting her; she’s bleeding out.” He doesn’t wait to see if I comprehend his instructions, he and his partner move forward and lift Stella as if she weighs nothing and place her on the stretcher they brought with them. I race to her side, using the palm of my hand to put pressure on her wound, and we move out of the room and down the stairs in a complicated and quick maneuver that almost has me falling down the steps.
The police arrive just as we are getting to the foyer and try to talk to me, but I disregard them and go with the attendants into the ambulance. I can hear Tyson speaking with the police behind me but I couldn’t tell you what his words consisted of. Everything right now is a buzzing sound in my brain. We get Stella into the ambulance, and I sit by her side. The paramedic moves back and forth with different machines and straps an oxygen mask on her. The vehicle pulls away and races down the road at a fast speed, sirens blaring.
She looks so small and delicate on the stretcher, her beautiful dark hair fanned out behind her and matted with blood. An angel with all of her creamy skin marred and stained with her life essence. I don’t know what to do with my hands, the paramedic took over applying pressure to her wound. I grasp her cold fingers, threading them through mine, and hold tight, kissing the palm of her blood-tinged hand. “I love you, Stella. Please don’t leave me.” I whisper into her palm.
The ride to the hospital feels like I blinked, and we were pulling up in front of the emergency bay, doctors and nurses already waiting on us. The ambulance doors open, and the paramedics work quickly to get her out, giving her care over to the doctor, who is impatiently waiting. He rambles off some words I am not even sure of, the only thing I catch is her pulse is low, and she’s bleeding out.
The nurses grab onto the stretcher and rush her inside. The doctor in dark blue scrubs who was barking orders grabs onto my arm as I move to follow. “Are you the husband?” I nod my head yes, my mouth unable to form words. “Does she have any allergies? Could she be pregnant?” He questions urgently.
“I…I don’t know. We…are newlyweds.” I stammer at the knowledge that I actually know very little about my wife, the thought horrifying me.I don’t know if Stella has any allergies, I never thought to fucking ask.What kind of piece of shit husband doesn’t know what his wife is allergic to? I drag my fist through my hair, pulling on my strands.Could she be pregnant?Fuck, I don’t even know if she’s even on birth control and we have been fucking like rabbits!
The doctor doesn’t bother waiting for me to come to my senses. He runs off after my wife and leaves me standing there like the useless turd I am in the emergency bay.I can’t breathe…I can’t breathe!My chest is too tight, and my vision is dimming; my breathing is becoming shallow and erratic. I stagger forward; Ineed to get to Stella.I take a step and then another and collapse forward onto my knees. I can’t seem to get any air into my lungs; my chest feels so tight. A sharp pain is coming from my left side. I need to get to my little ice queen. I have to make sure she’s alright.
“Shit! Get a gurney, this one’s going into cardiac arrest!” A woman’s voice yells around me. I don’t know who she’s talking about. Is she talking about me?Am I having another fucking heart attack? Now?
NO! I need to get to Stella. She’s mine!I try to get back to my feet, but this time I fall forward and land on my face, my chin hitting the dirty concrete as my vision dips out until darkness consumes me. My last thought is of two beautiful arctic blue eyes and words written in blood. I love you, Stella Stratford, fucking fight for me, fight for us.STELLA!
36
Jaxon
“Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.” Henry Van Dyke
“Ugh…fuck!”Mymouthtasteslike a donkey’s ass and is dry like the Arabian deserts.What the fuck did I eat?My lashes flutter but feel stuck together and my eyes are crusty and gritty. I rub my hand across my face and force them open. Bright overhead lights greeting me and momentarily blinding me.
“Jaxon, thank fuck, you scared the shit out of me, bud!” My assistant Jake’s voice greets me. I narrow my vision and stare at him standing in front of whatever the hell I’m lying on.What am I lying on?My eyes dart across the space, and annoyance fills me instantly, another damn hospital room. What a fucking surprise,not!I’m going to have to have words with this fucker about talking to me like I’m one of his drinking buddies and not his boss. Why am I once again lying in a hospital bed? This shit is getting ridiculous and starting to get old as fuck.Maybe we are getting old motherfucker; my mind snickers at me. Fuck that shit. I’m not even thirty yet!
My glare returns to Jake just as the memory of Stella lying in a pool of her own blood accosts me and my body goes icy with panic. “Stella, where the fuck is Stella?” I shove the blankets back, push my legs quickly off the side of the bed and try to stand up. Wiring across my chest and tubing in my arm pulls me back down and I reach forward to rip it from my body while dizziness attacks me and my stomach cramps. “Hey boss, slow down. You can’t rip that off!” Jake tries to grip my hands and prevent me from removing the heart monitor currently attached to my skin.
“Stella, where is she?” Why is he not answering me? A scream crawls up the back of my throat and threatens to choke me. My shoulders curl forward and I wrap my arms tightly around myself. My chest feels like it’s caving in, bile races up the back of my throat and I have to force myself to swallow to keep it from spewing out of my mouth. A wave of dizziness hits me at the same time.Is she dead?Is that why he won’t answer me? No she can’t be! Stella is a fighter, she would have fought to stay alive.She wouldn’t have left me, not like that.
“Hey, Jaxon, breathe buddy! She’s alright! She’s alive!” His ruddy face is filled with concern, and sweat dots his massive forehead and upper lip. I reach forward and grasp onto the front of his shirt, pulling him closer to me in a tight grip. The material making a ripping sound at my harsh treatment. “She’s alive?” I question in desperation, my mind refusing to hope while my heart thuds painfully in my chest.
“She lost a lot of blood, but she’s alive, Jaxon.” Jake pulls back, trying to dislodge my grip. “You had a mild heart attack when you got to the hospital with her. The doctor thinks it was all the stress of the situation. You’re being monitored right now just in case you have another one, so you need to stay calm.”
I had another heart attack? Like shit, how many can a man have before his heart gives out? Am I a cat with nine fucking lives at this point? Honestly, I hope that’s the case, I have a feeling I’m going to need more than one life with the way shit is going with Stella. She’s alive but lost a lot of blood. I need to get to her, to be by her side when she wakes. My little ice queen is fighting for her life and mine will mean nothing if she doesn’t survive.
“How long was I out?” Panic surges through me, and my stomach clenches tight at the thought that I have been unconscious for hours while she has been alone. What if someone tries to get to her here in the hospital? The thought has me pulling the intravenous from my hand with a sharp yank. Blood trickles down my hand and drips onto the white hospital linens as Jake stares on in horror at my actions.
