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“I’m not a violent man, Luna,” I say. “I’m only addressing the sickos who’re thinking of using the people I care about to get to me.”
She doesn’t look relieved. Fine. Whatever.
I look back into the camera. “You know who you are, and I’ll come for you if you threaten the people I love. All I need is a photo of where you live, and I can be there in a blink of an eye. So stay thehellaway from my family and friend.”
“You mean friends?” Luna asks.
“I only have one, and she knows who she is.” Damn, I sound like a loner, but I’d rather have one incredible friend like River, loyal AF, than a hundred shallow friends who don’t give a shit. I want people I can trust in my life. Okay, and who won’t make fun of me for my sad taste in TV shows. Or my love of robots. “Sadly, Luna, I have more enemies than friends these days, and I want them all to know I’m done hiding from them.”
“It sounds like you have some serious foes out there, Ultra. Should we give you a new name? Mr. Revenge? Mr. Justice, perhaps?”
“Just Mr. Love.”
“Well, you arejust, but you don’t sound so loving,” she replies.
I flash a confused look. “I am to the people who matter. I’m all about the love.” I point into the camera. “But if you’re an evil motherfu—bleep!—then I’ll show you a different kind of love.” I push my right fist into my left palm and grind.
Luna’s hazel eyes go wide, and she turns to address the camera. “Well, you heard it here first: Just Mr. Love is alive and well and ready to rumble. This is Luna Satori with channel one, reporting live from Malibu.”
The cameraman stops filming, and Luna waits until he’s back to the van to start talking. “Just Mr. Love, can I say something off the record?”
“I didn’t mean you should call me Just; I mean, I do believe in justice, but—”
“I think you’re really missing out on a big opportunity,” she says, cutting me off.
“What do you mean?”
“Look for yourself.” She points her pink manicured finger at the excited crowd gathering around us, taking videos and pics. “The world is falling into chaos. People have lost trust in the government, in big companies, and in each other.Youcan bring everyone together. You can give them hope for real change.”
What’s she smoking? “You must be thinking of the other guy with the red cape.” I’m not wearing one now, but I did before my “death.” River asked me to do it. I figured she might have a kink I didn’t know about, so who was I to say no?
“Just Mr. Love, you can be a real-life superhero. You’re larger than life. Do you know what that means to people?”
“Call me Huff,” I say, making another attempt to get her to stop calling me Just. She has no clue who I really am. “Luna, I am a regular guy who was subjected to some nasty chemicals and survived. That’s it.”
“We both know that’s oversimplifying it. You’re a modern miracle. And who’s to say this wasn’t fate?”
Someone had a little too much wheatgrass after yoga this morning. She strikes me as one of those California New Agey types.Bleh.
She adds, “And I appreciate why you put on the tough-guy act. Can’t be easy knowing there are people out to hurt your family in order to get to you. But you’re clearly a good guy.”
She’s right. I’m also not much for violence. It took killing twelve fish to work my way up to a mouse. Sure, the mouse was getting into my cupboards back at the lake house. I still felt like crap when I saw the mouse’s tiny head all smooshed like a ripe strawberry. What can I say? I’m a lover, not a fighter.
“I do prefer being nice over being an asshole,” I admit. “But I meant what I said, Luna. If anyone harms the people I care about, I’ll kill them.” I’m only being half truthful. I mean, yes, I will defend their lives any way I have to, but would I go straight to the kill option? I’d probably break a few pinky toes first. Those suckers are sensitive, and anyone who’s stubbed ol’ pinky toe knows it. Or maybe I’d superglue them naked to a very tall building after covering them in birdseed—a nightmare I once had that still haunts me.
So many beaks…A cold shudder runs down my spine.
Luna smiles with a curious glint in her hazel eyes.
“What?” I ask.
“I like you.”
I’m not used to getting compliments from pretty women. I’ve been in hiding since the change. “Err…thanks?”
“I mean it. You’re this strange mixture of hot and sweet with a dash of scary. You’re also genuine—a rarity around here.” She pulls a business card from her slacks. “My cell number’s on there. Call me sometime. Drinks. Coffee. Friendly chat. Sex. Whatever you want, I’m game.”
Wow.Well, she is beautiful, but I’m in love with the girl back home. Not that River still lives in my hometown. Also, she’s currently locked up, so she’s not even atherhome.
