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We Know What We Did
Searle wrestled me down off the platform.
“Hewon.” The bond between Sterling and I still existed, and it surged with feral triumph and glee and not far away, he howled, calling me to him. The chaos was nearly a riot.
“Remember whatwedid. I can still feel you grinding yourself on my cock,” Searle hissed.
Remembrance and realization washed through my brain.
“Luna,” Searle said to Marcella as she crawled over the surging crowds to us.
“Let’s go.” Marcella grabbed my other wrist. “I know. He’s calling. We have to leave. That’s the plan.”
Searle herded both of us through the press of crowds, who barely noticed us while howls rang through the meeting site and the wolves who hadn’t been in attendance answered with shocked howls of their own and the news echoed through the hills.
Alpha Alan of FrostFur had been defeated by Sterling, the Lone Wolf.
He’d done it.
Marcella watched the road retreat behind us while Searle drove.
“You never told me what happens now,” I said, voice shaking.
“It doesn’t matter,” Searle said. “Because we know what happened.”
My soul cracked.
He’d won.He’dwon,and I was his prize.
Thepainof what I’d done threatened to break all my ribs as it crawled out of my chest and danced along my torso, waving to the crowds. I gasped for breath, each one feeling impossible to take, but they came anyway. Tears coursed down my cheeks.
Oh Gaia. Oh Gaia. What had I done? What had I done?
I had failed him.
I twisted invisible wedding rings and squeezed the bone of my ring finger.
Searle leaned against the wall. “If he won’t take you back, we’ll use the tears.”
That vial needed to get thrown into the ocean. It was proof Gaia had only given us enough rope to hang ourselves with.
I could use the tears to free Sterling. I wouldn’t use it to redeem my own sins. I’d started all this teetering on the edge ofAbomination. I would finish it that way, cleaved and bereft of the wolf I loved. The story of the princess said the vial didn’t erase the love, it just erased the bond. The shape of the love still existed, with all its craters and grooves ruthlessly carved into your soul.
“We can think about it.” Tears slid down my cheeks. I closed my eyes.
“What is there to think about?” he asked, sounding irritated under his attempt at being soft.
“Wouldn’t you want me tochooseyou? When I’msane?”
“We’ve already been chosen for each other. That’s how the vial works. This isexactlyhow the vial works. So that the pair is sanctified and doesn’t have to live in abject misery.” He reached down and grabbed my hands, squeezing too tight. I tugged, he didn’t let go.
I yanked free. “Stop it.”
“Chooseme,” he said tersely. “Live as Winter again, justchoose.”
Why would Searle want me anyway, when the vial would give him the power to choose someone else he actuallydesired? The answers to that were probably gross.
He knelt down in front of me, holding both my hands. “Winter.”
