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Demetrius glanced at me, then back at Searle. “It did not sound minor, and it does notlookminor. What are you picking up?”
“Journals, so they can go in my safe.”
“Perhaps you should pick up your mate instead.”
Propped up against the wall, I looked down at my side. No bloodstains. Every breath yanked skin that hated the fact my soul hadn’t left my body yet. My blood vessels throbbed and my nerves delivered a sensation not unlike squeaking teeth.
Searle tossed me a dismissive glance. “These journals are more dangerous than her oozing from a few micro-bruises.”
Aww, he said such sweet, lovely things. I dragged myself towards the papers. He wasn’t going to get my things in the world’s worst game of pickup sticks. He was right that some torn fibers wouldn’t stop me. Mom had left me those journals for a reason, and that reason might have been so I could admire her pretty doodles the rest of my life or it might be because Gaia Herself had spoken, but either way: they weremine.
“Stop,” Demetrius commanded.
Searle and I both stopped moving.
“What are these notebooks?” Demetrius crouched down and picked up one of the stray pieces of paper. On it was a sketch of mountains Mom had done. I hadn’t seen that one—on the side facing me was a rocky seascape and a seashell like the one on the chain Mom had left for me, that I’d given to Spring. The little pretty blue ones. What had Hamid called them? Limpets. It was a limpet.
My left-hand fingers twitched with memories.
Marcella, wearing gray yoga pants and a white tank top, emerged from the bedroom. She’d never been dressed casually around me, and it hit as a bit of a shock and then a double-smack of this was my new reality. And she had great abs. I needed abs like that when my abs regrew.
“Do you know why she has these?” Demetrius asked Marcella, flicking the paper in her direction. “I thought we agreed she has nothing of her past life that could identify her.”
“I haven’t had a chance to tell you.” Marcella took the sheet from her mate. “Elder Luna Autumn left some of her dream journals under her seal with her sister Spring. I know they’re identifying, but Elder Lunas never use their seal lightly, and Autumn wasparticularlynotorious for not using her seal. I am not inclined to disrespect an Elder Luna’s seal, even if it’s risky. Searle, why has this become a fight?Heinsisted that she keep these with her, and you know I made the concession.”
Demetrius pursed his lips but did not argue with his mate.
“She refuses to let me put them in the safe. It became needlessly dramatic.” Searle presented Marcella with the bits he’d picked up so far.
“And Iagreed, if you shared the code with me.” Every word hurt. “You told me I could see them when you couldsupervise. We both know that will be never.”
Searle pivoted on the balls of his feet. “We can’t be careless. I explained this. And I do not trustyouto not be careless or underestimate the risk. You are careless, uneducated, uninformed, reckless, and overconfident.”
What, nounvarnishedin there? Time to introduce him to the concept. “You talk to me like I’m the half-formed luckless version of an Abomination, and I can’t even get that right. And I should begratefulI have a wolf like you to make sure I don’t hurt anyone else.”
“The trail of blood and carnage and damage you’ve left behind does not disprove my statements. You are bad luckat best, and I intend to minimize the damage to this pack, “ Searle said in that maddeningly cool, quiet voice.
“Enough,” Demetrius growled at Searle, causing the wolf to twitch and re-focus on his Alpha. “That is anappallingway to speak to her. Prestigious packs are willing to cross the prestige ocean to get rid of her. She’s a tiny wolf fighting Elder Packs ontheirterms attheirgame, and she’s still alive.”
“Technically, she isn’t.”
Marcella crouched down and picked up the bits and pieces of journal. “First Beta, she convinced us to intercede, she led a rescue into Elder enemy territory to rescue a Chronicler, she tricked a prestigious pack into letting them into their territory, survived silver torture and mocked the wolves who tortured her, survived two more attacks by yet another prestigious pack, and forcedusto get our paws bloody before we were prepared to. So far, she’s done quite a bit more than survive. When a little wolf has the entire Elder Council wary of her next move, she iswinning.”
Marcella finished gathering up all the bits and shuffled them into a neat pile, which she re-tied with the ribbon.
Demetrius chuckled. His eyes gleamed and his scent became prestige and violence, which was at odds with his composed exterior. Then he shifted his attention to Searle. “I understand your concern, but Summer is yourmate. You won’t win her trust or her heart by grinding her snout into how she got here.”
How could everyone just call meSummer, like they didn’t all know my name was Winter? How the hell could everyone talk to Searle like he was my mate, when we all knew he wasn’t? That disconnected feeling that I was wearing someone else’s skin started again, but this time, it wasn’t nearly as hilarious as convincing Manhattan I knew a damn thing about fine art or what earrings to wear with what shoes. If I thought I’d sold my pelt to Manhattan, I was selling my soul to AmberHowl.
Searle bristled and stood to his full height. “I neverthreatenedher. I would never threaten her.”
Demetrius took Searle’s hand and looked under the fingernails. The yellow wax of the seal was trapped under the nails. “You tried to take. Thatisthreatening.”
Searle didn’t budge. “She’s dangerous and needs to be corralled and contained.”
“She is a member of this pack and she is your mate. You don’t tame a she-wolf by growling at her. The only time you ever turn your fangs on a she-wolf is when you want a fight to the death, or shepermitsyou to use them for her enjoyment. You know this.” Demetrius gave him a smack on the side of the head and a low growl. Searle flinched under the smack but obediently turned his gaze to a point over Demetrius’ shoulder.
I shoved myself along the wall. The pain in my side made me dizzy and blurry and it hurt to breathe. More like Icouldn’tbreathe. My torso didn’t want to move that way. Marcella shuffled the papers and journals in her hands, then presented them to Searle. “Put them in the safe and give her the code. Do not deny or police her access.”
