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“It never even started, Austin, because you didn’t give it a chance. Felicity is not Kelly. And you’re letting Kelly rob you of a whole lot more than money if you let the ghost of your relationship come between you and Felicity.”
Essentially, Felicity had said the same thing.
“Anyone who knows the two of you can see as plain as day that she is in love with you. And I know you and I can see that you are in love with her. You’re just too big of an idiot to get out of your own way.
“Actually, let me rephrase that—you’re too scared because of how things went down with your ex-wife to let things bloom with Felicity. You will be an idiot if you don’t go after her and let her walk away. Austin, don’t let her walk away. You have used work as an excuse for too long. You’ve been hiding behind the one mistake you made when you were twenty-five years old. It’s time that you forgive yourself, quit punishing yourself. Put the past behind you and start living the life you deserve.”
* * *
Sometimes it just took somebody you loved and trusted to hold up a mirror in front of your face, so you could see exactly how big of a dolt you were being and how much you stood to lose. Tonight, Savannah had held up that mirror.
Austin could feel the feelings she was talking about. He knew they were there living inside him, trapped in his heart, but he couldn’t identify them to save his life. Not until his little sister had shone the spotlight on everything and made him realize he had to face his fears.
Thank God, Austin thought. Thank God he had snapped out of it before it was too late. If it wasn’t too late already. He’d never know unless he tried.
On the drive home, after he’d dropped Savannah off at the airport, everything crystallized. Why was he willing to watch the best thing that had ever happened to him walk out of his life forever, without at least trying to save the relationship?
Felicity was worth it.
The two of them together—they were worth it.
They deserved a fighting chance. He didn’t know if she felt the same way, but he would be an idiot if he didn’t at least do what he could to let her know how he felt. The best way to start was by telling her exactly how he felt about her. He was in love with her. This wasn’t just a passing whim. These feelings had been building for nearly five years. He owed it to himself and to her and to their future to let her know how he felt, even if it meant risking her rejecting him and telling him she didn’t feel the same way.
On the drive home, an idea brewed. A big gesture. It might very well backfire in his face. Felicity might look at him and tell him to go to hell. But he had to do it. He had to chance it. Because she was the love of his life.
* * *
Felicity woke the morning of her graduation feeling empty and overcome by a sense of gray ennui. Maybe it was mental exhaustion after everything she had endured the past two weeks. Actually, going back even further than that—the whole buildup to the charity gala, the buildup and eventual letdown with Austin. The final two weeks at Fortune Investments spent avoiding each other in an awkward dance of pretending. Or, at least, pretending on her part. Then, the grand finale when she thought Austin would be a no-show at her going away party, and true to form, then Austin had changed everything, coming through the door at the very last minute.
But now, she was free. She wouldn’t have to ride that roller coaster any longer. The messed-up thing about it was she was sad. She had worked so damn hard to get to this day, to get her MBA, which was supposed to set her free, but now more than ever she felt as if it had been the instrument of her demise.
She got out of bed, shuffled into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee that had autobrewed, knowing that she was being overly dramatic. The MBA hadn’t been the cause of her demise. What happened between her and Austin had been inevitable—and so had their parting of ways. This was like the day after an accident where she had been banged up. She didn’t realize how badly her pride had been wounded until now; it had suffered a beating. Every day from here on out, she would get stronger and feel better. The first thing she had to do was make sure she held her head high and kept a positive outlook.
