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“When I saw you the other day, in your bedroom…” he started, “I almost couldn’t believe it was you. You were…you were so confident and so powerful and so— Fuck. You’re amazing, Tessa. Look at the numbers you got tonight.You don’t need me. Not for help with the sex study. Not even to pump you up to do auditions. You just need to listen to yourself and do what you’ve been doing.”
I couldn’t think straight. I squeezed my eyes shut to force my dizzy brain to work. Why was he saying this? Why did he keep saying I didn’t need him? And why did he look so sad?
“But, Ellis…”
A car pulled up along the sidewalk and Ellis glanced over to it. “Look, that’s my date,” he said, pulling off his nametag and fidgeting with the edges. “I ordered you an Uber. It’ll be here any minute.”
Feeling numb from head to toe, I stared dumbly as Ellis stepped forward, kissed me on the cheek, and whispered, “I love you, baby.”
He didn’t look back when he got in the car.
And then he was gone.
Ellis had told me he loved me—as a friend, of course—and then he’d left me. And somehow, it felt like he was leaving me forever, and I couldn’t help the tears that streamed down my face at the hollow feeling of loss that came over me.
Ellis
My date—I think her name was Rebecca—slid her fingers along my inner thigh and toward my crotch as she sped along the highway toward a producer’s party in the Hills. She cupped my balls and curved forward until the strap of her dress slid off her right shoulder, revealing a small, perky tit. She pressed her stiletto further onto the gas, sending her Lamborghini passing one car after another. When she moved to stroke my cock, she paused and glanced over at me.
“Everything okay, baby?” she asked pointedly.
Normally, I would be rock hard at this point and unzipping my pants like a fucking over-eager high school kid so she could jerk me off with those long, thin fingers. But my dick lay limp, totally unreactive to Rebecca’s efforts.
The truth is, I had barely even felt her touch as I stared out the window and watched the streetlamps flash by at eighty miles an hour. Because I hadn’t really been in the car with her at all during those first twenty minutes. I was still under the bright lights of a Holiday Inn conference hall with Tessa’s arms around my neck, lips pressed together in a kiss I’d imagined a million times but had never expected to ever happen.
And even as it was happening, I couldn’t help thinking that the kiss wasn't aboutus, wasn’t about Tessa genuinely desiringme, but just another byproduct of the New Tessa adventure she was on. We’d been competing for numbers, and she’d been drinking too much, and I’d been giving her shit, and we’d kissed. I’d immediately wanted to sweep her up in my arms and haul her away so we could undress and make love forever, but I couldn’t—because I didn’t have forever with her. Not in that way. I had to remember that when it came to finding guys for her sex study, she hadn’t even considered me. And I couldn’t keep doing it. I couldn’t keep pretending it didn’t bother me, helping her so she could fuck other men. I’d always be her friend, but I couldn’t keep doing that for her because each time I did, it was chipping away at my heart.
“Ellis?”
“Huh?” I turned to find Rebecca glancing between me and the road, concern on her face.
“Is everything okay?” she asked, reaching to pull back up the strap of her dress and cover her exposed breast.
I was about to tell her I was fine. Absolutely fine. But I was done lying to myself.
I wasn’t fine.
Because I was in love with Tessa Juliet Stewart.
And she was the only woman I wanted to be with.
“No, actually, everything is not okay. Sorry, Rebecca, but I need to call it a night.”
Who the hell was this new Ellis, and where the hell had he come from?
I was so fucked.
Chapter 16
Tessa
Two days later, I was in Cade’s VW van, parked along a remote part of the beach, the air oppressive in the tight van as I bounced up and down on Cade’s cock in the front seat, head bumping against the ceiling, back hitting the steering wheel, fingers clutching at his shoulders, Jamie in the passenger’s seat watching us, stroking his own cock.
My mind kept slipping from awareness of what was happening with my body (good god was this delicious) to what had happened two nights earlier at the mixer (good god was that painful to remember). I’d done my best over the last two days to ignore what Ellis had done and had doubled down with fucking my new besties. But still, I missed Ellis with an intensity that tightened my chest every time I thought of him, which granted, wasn’t nearly as much when I was having sex.
Which is why I was having a lot of sex.
“Fuck him harder,” Jamie growled out. I obliged and suddenly Cade reached over and wrapped his long fingers around Jamie’s dick.
