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“We’ll just be taking a walk around,” Jack says loudly as he drags Ariel out by her hand.
Carra pokes her finger in my chest. “Okay, the bedroom. But no dirty business.”
“The shower is—”
I jump when she pinches me. “Some other time. Now, we can stand here and debate this, or we can go see the bedroom.” With a laugh, she takes off for the stairs.
I chase after her and we storm up the massive staircase like two kids.
Two flights up, I say, “The last door is the master suite. But I want to show you this room first.”
When I turn the handle and lead her in, Carra freezes. Her eyes brighten as she looks around the gigantic bedroom. “It’s so incredible.”
Sunlight bathes the space, spilling in from impossibly big windows. Plush cream carpet lays a foundation for its elegance. A tall mirror on our right stretches to the ceiling. Adjacent to that is a long bench covered in black silk, strewn with red pillows. There’s a sitting area with two modern, red leather couches and tables adorned with fresh bouquets of pink flowers. On the far side of the suite is a bed draped in cream velvet bedding. Windows that go on for miles surround the room. Soft drapes hang like creamy waterfalls dropping from the ceiling to pool on the floor.
It’s a slice of feminine heaven. At least that’s how my mind sees it. But I’m just a simple dude. When I look at the room, all I can think about is my lovely fiancée naked in all that sunshine.
Easing up to her, I wrap my arms around her waist and let my chin rest on top of her head. She’s so quiet, breathing shallowly as I hold her. “This is yours. If you’d like to stay here instead of the master suite with me, you can. All the other rooms are yours too, of course, but you’d be close to me so I can keep you safe if you stay in this one.”
Her hands rise and clasp onto my forearm. “Thank you. That means more than you’ll know.”
Before I get too tangled up in my head, I need to move. “Come on. Lots more to show you. You’ll like this too.” I open the French doors to the closet.
It’s a grand room. “Bigger than some apartments that I’ve had. All the features I’m told a bride will love.”
Her hand goes to her throat. “This is... going to be empty. I only have a suitcase of clothes. They’d fit in that one drawer.”
“We’ll take care of that soon enough. I’ll send Eva to help you get started if you like.”
She looks up at me. “Is this all just some kind of joke? Because it feels like we are playing some game.”
“No games. This is life and death, Carra. And when I told you I love you, I meant it. I know how fucked up things are right now. But my feelings for you are as solid as the earth beneath your feet.”
After a minute of bristling silence, she hugs me as she makes a throaty sound. “I’m scared. Of the wedding and of this storm inside of me. Of what I want. Of what I don’t want. Of what I want to want.”
“I’ll see you through this. Just trust me. I'll do everything in my power to keep you safe and happy.”
Holding me tighter, she says, “Eva said you’re the man for the job.”
I can’t answer. The weight of taking Coghlan down is getting heavier by the day. I know one thing. I won’t go down without giving all of me. Even if that means the end of me, and the beginning of life for Carra.
Her sigh is too heavy for a young woman her age. Aren’t we quite the pair?
She pulls out of my arms and straightens her ponytail. “Let’s see that kitchen before Ariel gets into some kind of trouble. She’ll probably have your friend cooking by the time we get down there.”
“Which one shall we start with?”
“The biggest, because I bet that’s where we’ll find them.”
When we walk toward the door, the sheen of moisture in her eyes is impossible to miss.
By the time we tour the rest of the house, the girls are chattering wildly. Recipes are in the works. There are lots of plans about bake offs and dinners, and how to arrange the giant supply pantries. They both seem really happy.
I even find myself daydreaming about things I’ve never let myself dream about before. A table filled with family. My own.
But those thoughts are soon followed by a stinging reminder that Carra was pregnant.
She’s yet to tell me. A fact that rides me harder and hurts me more every fucking day.
