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I clear my throat. “Mom came to see me today.” I ready myself for the news to hurt him—after all, I suspect he still loves Mom—but he doesn’t look upset at all.
“I know,” he tells me.
“What do you mean?”
“I told her to come.”
My eyebrows knit.
Dad places his hand on my arm. “What happened between me and your mom after Bri died doesn’t concern you. Your relationship with your mother is separate from my relationship with her. I don’t want you to suffer because of my mistake.”
“Your mistake?”
He takes a deep breath and slowly releases it. “Remember I told you that we said some horrible things to each other after Bri passed? I wasn’t completely honest. I was ashamed for you to learn the truth. But the truth is thatIsaid horrible things to her and that’s why she left. She was in so much pain—we both were—but my words cut her so deeply that she ran.”
My throat burns. “What did you say?”
He lowers his head. “Your mother and Bri never got along. I know now that your sister was hurting and felt like she had no one to turn to. I blamed your mother for not doing a better job of reaching her. I blamed her for distancing your sister from our family. And after she got into that helicopter with her boyfriend—”
“Justin.”
“Yes, Justin. I said things to your mom that I didn’t mean. I was so torn up over Bri’s death that I snapped. To this day, I regret it with every fiber of my being. A few weeks ago, I got a call from your mother. I missed the call and was surprised to see her name on my phone. I didn’t call her back. I was too ashamed after what I said to her. I suppose I figured pretending your mother didn’t exist would erase the terrible things I said to her. I’m so, so sorry, Colt. It was me who made your mother leave. I want you to have a relationship with her. That’s why I told her to come here. It’s important for you to have your mother in your life. She loves you.”
Tears fill my eyes. All this time, I blamed Mom for leaving when she really was just trying to protect herself and deal with Bri’s death. I should have responded to her texts. I shouldn’t have ignored her.
Dad wraps his arm around me. “Please let your mother be part of your life, Colt.”
“What about you? I can see it all over your face. You still love her.”
Dad shifts in his seat, shaking his head. “Colt, I—”
“You said she called you a few weeks ago. Maybe she wants you in her life, too. Maybe she misses you.”
He doesn’t say anything.
I place my hand on his shoulder. “I want us to be a family again. If Mom wants it, too, that is. But I have a feeling she does. I know she still loves you.”
He doesn’t look so sure. “She’ll never forgive me.”
“She asked where you were when she came here. I figured she was just asking, but now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure she wanted to see you.”
“Colt—”
“Let’s invite her for dinner. Let’s sit down as a family and talk. I don’t want you guys to give up on each other, if it’s something you both want. Do you want Mom in your life, Dad?”
He sighs, his chest heaving. “I do. Of course I do. But she’ll never have me. I said some terrible things.”
“Only Mom could decide for herself if she wants to forgive you. Please let’s invite her for dinner. Bri would want us to be a family again.”
He’s quiet as he mulls over my words. Then he says, “All right.”
***
Dad and I try to cook dinner. We fail miserably, but it’s the thought that counts, right? Mom should be here any second.
Dad’s very nervous, pacing the dining room. He styled his hair and put on a nice shirt and pants. I dressed nicely as well. I hope Mom wants him back in her life. I really want to have a family again.
The doorbell rings.
