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Remembrance of the centuries of torture pierced into me, and my hands balled into fists. “I didn’t.” I shook my head. “I want to kill Salenia, too. More than ever.”
She placed a hand on my chest, and I gazed at her, bewildered how she was still here. “We need to talk.”
“After we kill Salenia,” she assured, but I could feel her through the soulmate connection now she was a vampire. It was stronger than ever before, like it was its own living, breathing being.
“We need to figure out how to kill her,” she snapped. “Now the elixir is gone.”
“Let’s talk in the room,” I said, pointing at the door.
She huffed, then walked inside. Most of the scars had healed, but the one that had ultimately killed her, stretched across her throat, running all the way down her arm and under her shirt—her death mark.
I winced, wanting to hold her, to kiss every inch of her. I finally had her back, away from the underworld, and she had to know the truth. I’d kept too much from her before, about Salenia. She hadn’t known I was already married to the goddess when I met her. Perhaps if I’d let her know then, she would have stayed away.
“I need to tell you something, and it’s going to be confusing.” I sat across from Anastasia, who lowered herself down into a leather armchair. “I’m not who I thought I was, and neither are you. My memories were cloaked from me for the best part of a century, but the veil has lifted and I remembered everything.”
I closed my eyes as the memory of Salenia’s compulsion, after Kalon had turned me into a vampire, came back. She wanted me to hate mortals, told me I did, and I believed her. I carried that belief all this time, as if it was my own.
“What are you talking about?” Elizabeth asked.
I sighed. “I know this isn’t the best time, and I promise, I will get you some blood.” I thought about Alana, wondering if I could ask her to fill a few cups, so Elizabeth could quench her thirst without killing anyone, like last time.
Guilt prickled in me as I recalled everything: the pain, the suffering she went through, especially in the underworld. She’d remember and hate me all over again. But I couldn’t keep her in the dark, especially not now. “This is going to be a lot for you to take in, but you’re going to be okay. There’s a tea I’ve been drinking, and I can get it for you. It will help you restore your memories.” I swallowed thickly, recalling my pain. “It will hurt at first, but you must know, you’re not who you think you are. You’re not Elizabeth, you’re my soulmate, Anastasia. You were sent out from the underworld and when you crossed the veil, you lost your memories.”
She loosed a sigh, then rose from her seat. Pressing her fingers against her temples, she paced in a circle. “I supposed it was just a matter of time.”
“Love?”
She turned to face me, her expression twisting into one I hadn’t seen in a long time—one which resembled Anastasia’s glare. Goosebumps spread over my arms and neck, my heart skipping a beat as I stared at the woman I’d loved for an eternity, realization washing over me.
“You know,” I stated, and nausea swirled in my stomach. I hesitated on her name, as if I didn’t think I’d say it again, to her. “Anastasia?”
“I was free,” she spat, tears brimming in her eyes. “Afterhundredsof years of torture, I gotout.”
My eyes widened, and I felt my heart pounding in my chest as I realized she had been lying to me this entire time. “How are you mortal, after all this time?”
“I wasn’t,” she admitted. “When I returned to this world, I was turned again. It was an accident, but I call it fate. Then I found Carla, or I should say she found me. She helped me remember everything about who I really am. She was a sorceress before Salenia turned her to spite me, but Carla hid it well. She was one of the most powerful ones, except for Azia.”
I slowly stood, the sound of her disapproving sigh ringing in my ears. Adrain was right about Carla. He had sensed magic in her. “Anastasia,” I said, a lump forming in my throat as I searched for the words. “Why did you come back? You were free from her.”
I thought about the struggles she had faced. No matter how deeply connected we were, especially since she’d become a vampire, the anguish numbed her emotions toward me. She hated me.
“Because of Salenia. Because of everything she putusthrough.” She let out a sharp cry and jabbed her finger in the direction of the door. “I found out you escaped. I went to find you, a century ago. But she came back to find you. She hasn’t just been pretending to be Gwen for a few years.” She hissed between her clenched teeth, "Try a century. She persuaded Kalon to turn you. Do you believe it was an accident they found you? Or that the shipwreck happened at all? She couldn’t have you die as a mortal. Then you’d be out of her grasp forever.”
I wanted to know why she didn't come when I turned, but I stopped myself. “I’m so sorry.”
She jerked her head, her eyes flashing with venom. “Do you think I’ve forgotten everything that happened? I wanted to make sure you were safe. That was it. When I found out you were in her sights, I knew I had to stop her. I would not allow her to have us both back in the underworld.” Her chest heaved. “Then I found out about the princess, the one chosen by the gods to kill Salenia. Carla and I tracked her to Baldoria. But her mom kept her well-hidden. I couldn’t have that. She needed to come to Sanmorte.”
I closed my eyes, taking in the silence and stillness of the darkness. I was astonished by Anastasia's resourcefulness. All I wanted was to hold her. She had to feel the connection between us, but she maintained her distance. “You led them to the princess.”
I heard her gulp as she swallowed thickly. “No. I led her boyfriend, Astor, to them. I delivered him right into Salenia’s hands, making her believe it was all her idea. Carla took care of it all, and it worked. He didn’t want to die. Salenia wanted Olivia. I just brought the two together,” she stated. “We had allies and friends we’d gathered over the years. They ensured Olivia would be protected when Nightshade came for Ravena, but Olivia’s soulmate got to her first. It didn’t matter, it ended up being for the best. Then I waited, hoping the prophecy would be unveiled,” she explained, “we ensured everything went according to plan. But Salenia found out that I was still alive.” She sat on the edge of the bed, her fingertips brushing against the soft, cotton sheets. “I got reckless with my identity. She hunted me down months ago, but by the time she reached me, Carla was already protecting me, and I was a vampire. So instead of killing me and sending me back, she had her precious Malum Dominor slip me the elixir. I became mortal again.”
“Oh, love.” Her breath hitched as I closed the distance between us. She stepped away before my arms could close around her. All I yearned for was to feel her against me and the gentle touch of her lips. I ached with the intensity of my missing her, of missing everything. “Please, Anastasia. I know you’ve been through a lot.” I crouched in front of her, needed to feel her presence. “But I’m here and no matter what happened, I always loved you. That never changed.”
Her eyes locked with mine. “You are the worst thing that ever happened to me.”
An intense stabbing sensation echoed in my chest, and I recoiled. “I know.”
“But I still…” She paused, and her face betrayed the conflicting emotions she felt inside.
