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I’m not sure when to bring up the subject. In the first twenty minutes or so, the conversation is strictly dance and Broadway, which are two subjects I know nothing about. I make a mental note to look upA Chorus Linelater so I can at least be somewhat knowledgeable. Finally, there’s a lull in the conversation. River kicks my leg under the table and gives me a meaningful look which clearly meansnow’s your chance.
I take a minute to gather my thoughts and try to decide the best way to approach this. Then I decide to just go for it and approach it as myself. They know me well enough by now to understand my quirks.
I look at Zoe, who smiles at me behind her wine glass, her brown eyes sparkling. When she realizes I’m gearing up to speak, she scrunches her nose and looks at me with curiosity.
“What is it, sweetie?” she asks me.
I take a deep breath. “I’d like to be your surrogate. That is, if you do decide you want a child and you want me to be that person.”
Avery starts choking on a meatball. Cooper bangs on his back, trying to hide his amusement. Zoe just stares at me, her eyes wide, her mouth gaping.
Surprisingly, despite nearly dying, Avery recovers first. “Do you mind running that by us again?” he asks, his voice a little shaky.
I look over at River, who looks half amused and half exasperated, but he does nod encouragingly. Apparently, I still need to work on my delivery.
“Sorry. This might not be the best timing, but I’m going away for two weeks, so I wanted to give the two of you a chance to think about it. I know you two have been struggling with infertility. I recently found out that I am, in fact, fertile. I have been doing a lot of research, and while I’m clearly not a woman that all of the research is geared toward, I do feel like it is possible for me to carry your child if you are interested, and I am happy to do so. I even spoke to the scientists at the Omega project, and they believe it’s possible.”
Both of them still seem so shocked, so I continue speaking, not entirely sure if I’m making this worse or better for them. “I understand you need time to discuss it. And I just want to let you know the offer does not expire. You just got that amazing job, so I understand you may want to wait. That’s completely acceptable. If at any time you decide you would like me to be a surrogate, I am happy to do so.”
Avery is just blinking at me like I’m from an alien planet. Zoe has tears in her eyes, but I’m not sure if they are happy or sad. Since she still hasn’t said a thing, I ask, “Are those good tears?”
Zoe laughs while River snorts. “Yeah, sweetie, they’re good tears. I’m just so overwhelmed. That’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.”
Avery seems to finally shake off the shock and drags Zoe’s chair closer so he can wrap her in his arms. They don’t look like they’d be a couple. Zoe is always so bright and shines, even when she’s sad. And it’s not just her bright dresses that light up a room. Avery is a lot more reserved. Everything about him is a lot more unassuming. But, it clearly works for them. It’s obvious how much they love and support each other, even to me.
“Seriously, Lake, that’s super generous of you. You do understand we’ll need to discuss it, just the two of us, right? I don’t think we can give you an answer today.”
I wave off his concern. I figured that. “I know. Which is why I wanted to tell you now. Like I said, I’m going to be out of the country for a few weeks.” I pause. “Which, if you decide to do this, we will have to discuss my job and its impact. But it’s irrelevant if you decide against it completely.”
With her eyes still shining brightly with tears, Zoe unwraps herself from her boyfriend’s hold and circles the table to hug me. I find myself hugging her back immediately. She’s just infectious like that.
“Lake, seriously, thank you. You have no idea what this means to me, to us. Just having this option is a weight off my shoulders. We never would have been able to afford surrogacy the traditional route, and adoption is extremely expensive. I’m not sure if my non-traditional incomes would impact the chance of getting accepted. This gives us the chance to have a baby, and I’m so, so grateful.”
I smile into Zoe’s hair and hug her tighter. There’s a warmth growing inside me that I enjoy. I’m glad I can give them this option, even if they choose not to take it.
SIX
EVANDER
It is now 7:45 am on Saturday morning and there is still no sign of Lake Simmons. Logan is adamant the barista told him 7:15 without fail. Yet, he’s not here. I’m not a morning person. I’ve never been one, and the weekend is the only time I can ever indulge in sleeping in. I sacrificed one of my two days I can ever sleep past 7 am to meet this guy, and he’s not even here.
I know I’m being irrationally angry. Lake doesn’t even know who I am, let alone that I planned on ambushing him while he’s getting his morning coffee. But at this moment, I want to be irrational. I’m fucking tired, and I refuse to buy a $6 coffee on principal, so I’m starting to get a headache behind my eyes.
I decide I’m going to stay till 8 and then bail. Maybe I’ll try again on Tuesday. Or maybe I should take this as a sign that I’m a fucking ridiculous creeper and leave the poor guy alone, though I know that’s unlikely. Besides my own obsession, that I can’t even understand, I think about how excited Dad was when I told him I’m going to reach out to Lake. I know he’s desperate to at least check in and see how he’s doing. Dad was beyond relieved when we saw that stream and he learned that their mother finally managed to get away from Seth, but I know he needs more closure than that.
My phone vibrates, and I scowl when I see it’s Logan.Did you talk to him?
I don’t feel like texting because I’m pissed and grouchy and fully intend to take it out on Logan, even if it’s not his fault, so I call him.
He answers on the second ring. “What happened?” I can hear a lot of voices around him, and I realize he’s probably at work. I suddenly feel like an asshole. I don’t need to bother Logan with my problem that shouldn’t even be an issue.
“He never came. Sorry, I shouldn’t have called without making sure it’s ok. I’m a little irritable.”
Logan barks out a laugh. “I’m guessing you refused to buy one of the insanely overpriced coffees?”
How does Logan know me this well? “You guessed right.”
“Are you sure you didn’t just miss him? The barista was adamant he comes in every single Saturday.”
