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He slid his hands down her arms, thankful that she wasn’t pushing him away. The thought that she didn’t care enough to do so plagued him. ‘Give me the full details and I’ll get the best team of doctors to—’
‘No. I won’t be doing what you want, Cesare. Not this time.’
Alarm gripped the back of his neck. ‘What do you mean? We’re in this together. I’m only trying to help, tesoro mio.’
She finally lifted her gaze to his and the cool resignation in their depths stopped his heart. ‘No, thanks. I’ve asked Nathan to find me a flight. There’s a taxi coming to take me to the airport in fifteen minutes.’
Shock made him rock back on his heels but he quickly regrouped. ‘Cancel the taxi. First of all, you’re exhausted from running around at the wedding. We’ll have an early night and take the jet tomorrow—’
She pulled away from him and jumped to her feet. ‘You’re still not listening to me, Cesare. I came downstairs to discuss what was happening between us, but also to say that I’m sorry for putting the burden of my wanting a family on you. It’s what I’ve wanted for longer than I can remember but it wasn’t fair to put it all at your feet. I want to be with you and Annabelle more than anything, so I hoped we could find some sort of compromise, but I can see now there’s no hope for us, not if you’re not willing to let me in even a little bit.’
The rise of hope and its subsequent swift death left him reeling. ‘I...sì, we can—’
‘Do you know why I’ve always yearned for a family?’
He nodded. ‘Because you lost your mother when you were very young.’
‘It wasn’t just that. After she died, my father stopped seeing me—not that he’d paid me much attention to start with. But it was almost as if I’d ceased to exist in his eyes. When I dared to make myself heard, he would shut me down. Do you know how that feels? Being made to feel invisible? As if nothing I have to say or do matters?’
The icy stream that had drenched his veins solidified. ‘Ava, please listen—’
‘No, I’m done with controlling men.’
Her fire was back, and for that he was thankful. But he felt the distance between them widening with every second. ‘I wasn’t trying to control you—’
‘Of course you were! You decided that Annabelle and I were better off without you, so you withdrew from us. You decided that I wasn’t strong enough or was too upset to be told that Roberto was sick, and when he died you kept that to yourself, too. And...just now...’ She sucked in a deep breath as her voice broke.
Desperate, he reached for her but she pulled away. He shoved his hands into his pockets. ‘You didn’t hear the full story just now. Let me explain.’
‘I’m exhausted, Cesare. My father isn’t an easy man to deal with at the best of times, and I seriously doubt he’s had a sudden personality transplant, which means my visit is going to be a difficult one. I’d rather not use what little strength I have arguing with you.’
He pushed his fingers through his hair, anxiety and a previously unplumbed depth of fear coursing through him. If he let her walk out of here, would he ever see her again?
She’s leaving Annabelle in your care. That counts for something.
With everything in him screaming to do otherwise, Cesare stepped back. ‘Cancel the taxi, cara. Rest for a few hours before you make the trip. Paolo will drive you and the jet will be at your disposal. I’m sorry, but I’ll have to insist on that. I won’t let you travel while you’re exhausted.’
His heart sank even lower when she merely shrugged and looked away.
* * *
He prowled the hallway, his eyes darting to the stairs, even though Ava had long gone to bed. He gave a short bark of laughter at the irony. Had it been only two weeks ago that he’d tried to stop her from returning? And now he wanted to do the reverse because everything inside him rebelled against letting her go.
He stopped in his tracks, stunned all over again by the feelings coursing through him. He could storm upstairs, articulate them to her, but he risked her thinking it was another controlling ploy.
He had to let her go and hope he would get her back. Barring that...
Clamping down on the roiling emotions tearing through him, he strode into the living room. The discarded glass containing the cognac stood on the coffee table.
Picking it up, he knocked it back and sank onto the sofa. Fire and fear coursed a jagged path through his chest. The bottom of the glass mocked him.
