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“When did you get it?”
“I’ve always had it.” My thumb traced the tree trunk. “It once belonged to my mom.”
Astrid’s breath caught, her eyes going wide. She then suddenly started scrabbling for the clasp.
I stared at her, unable to understand what had gotten into her. “Astrid, what are you doing?”
“I can’t take this.”
My pulse spiked, and I grabbed her hands to make her stop. “Why not?”
She gazed at me. “Because it belonged to your mom. I can’t take something that special from you.”
I sucked in a deep breath.It’s not a rejection, Diego. It’s fine.“Hear me out. It belonged to her, but when she gave it to me, she had me make a promise. I was to give it to someone else who was special to me. They had to be capable of cherishing it like she did—like I do.”
I slid her hands down and closed them over the pendant. “That person is you, Cielo. I know, no matter what, you’ll cherish this.”
I hoped she understood what I meant. This wasn’t me trying to force an answer out of her. I wanted her to have this, regardless of what happened between us.
Astrid closed her eyes and then nodded before leaning into me, her face pressing against the crook of my neck. “Thank you.”
I wrapped her in my arms and rested my cheek on her head. Warmth bloomed in my chest and that near-magnetic pull I felt with her tugged harder, as if telling me we were still not close enough. This was what I wanted—every day, her in my arms.
“I like it on you,” I said. “Muy bonita.”
She hummed. “You should speak Spanish more often. I like it when you do.”
So, I did. I said so many things to her. Whatever I could think of that told her how I felt about her, as both my friend and the woman I wanted—how smart she was—how talented and tenacious she was—that I loved and hated her stubbornness and how it was such a driving force that encouraged me to never give up—how I didn’t have enough words to describe how beautiful and special she was to me.
As my rambling came to an end, I didn’t know how much she understood, especially with how quickly I realized I was talking, but it didn’t matter. I said what I wanted to say, and I did what she asked. Anything to make her happy.
My fingers slid through her loose strands of hair, grazing her cheek. Astrid gazed up at me with soft, kind eyes that could pierce any defense if I had any against her. My fingers stroked her cheek and her eyes fluttered.
I dipped my head and brushed my lips against hers. She sucked in a quiet breath before angling her fingers in my hair and embracing me back with her own tender kiss. Our lips moved in sync as the moment stretched on forever, my heart immersing itself in her feel and taste, and all that she was, committing this moment to memory, never wanting it to end.
Astrid pulled away suddenly, her lips pressing tight together. Disappointment swooped in my stomach. I’d done something wrong.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I… shouldn’t have done that.”
My brow furrowed. I didn’t understand what she meant.
She didn’t meet my gaze. “I’ve been too busy to think about anything but my training. It’s not right for me to—”
“You’re not leading me on,” I cut in, realizing where this was going. I should have realized this was what ran through her head the moment she pulled away.
“I don’t mean to feel like I’m pressuring you. It wasn’t my intention. I just fell into my feelings without thinking.” She lay her head on my chest as I tucked her into me. “I’ll try to keep myself in check.”
She snuggled into me. “It was nice.”
I kissed her forehead before reaching for the console controller to start up the movie. I’d take that as a consolation prize.
While I should have watched the movie, with her reciting various lines, I found myself more interested in watching her. Astrid had been quick to blame herself. She always did that. It was a response that had been one of her most difficult to break. Knowing her mother had caused most of her trauma, I better understood where these responses came from.
Her admittance to putting thoughts regarding my confessions to the side didn’t surprise me. It wasn’t a slight against me, or her way of not wanting to change things between us, even though I’d opened that bag of pixies. It showed the side of her she leaned into too much—the one where she put herself last.
Tyr and I were both vying for her affection. We’d both made that quite clear. But she wasn’t thinking about it. She was putting the prospects of love to the side, when it was something she heavily sought just a week ago, because she deemed saving the world more important.Why can’t you put yourself first for once, Astrid?
My fingers slid along her arm. She didn’t react—her slow breathing, and now lack of line-quoting a clear sign that the exhaustion she’d been fighting had won. I took in her peaceful expression, loving the way she found comfort in me, even when there was so much up in the air between us.
