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His words and perspective at his age rock me to my core. This sweet little boy of mine is so much smarter than I know, and sees more than he ever should.
Deciding to keep with vague truths, I say, “It’s not something any of us have talked about but when we do, and we figure it out, you’ll be the first to know, ‘kay?”
“Okay,” Zander says, and takes another bite of his sandwich.
I bug my eyes out to Jonas over Zander’s head, and he just winks back with a one-sided smile on his handsome face.
It makes me smile too. Kids really do say the darndest things.
***
Later that night, after getting Zander in bed, the four of us are all sitting in front of the TV to unwind.
“We need to talk about you getting an order of protection against Steven,” Gemini says. I’m tucked close to him, and his words have tension snapping my spine straight, like a ricocheting string on a bow.
“I don’t want to keep Zander from him. He may be a lousy husband, but he’s always been a good father to Zander,” I say, feeling conflicted. I want to know if he comes around me that I’m protected by the law, but I’m not willing to deprive Zander of his dad.
“You can be protected, and Zander can still see his dad. They have clauses for situations like this built into protection orders. At each exchange, you can have a uniformed police officer or court-approved liaison to facilitate handoffs,” Gemini explains. He would know, it’s part of his job. I know I need to do it, if for no other reason than to cover my own ass should he decide to do something stupid.
“Okay,” I agree.
It’s as if they collectively breathe a sigh of relief.
“Thank you, baby,” Gemini says, kissing my forehead. They all seem to have been waiting for the outcome of this conversation, because everyone settles in and watches the movie.
At the end of the movie, Orin and Gemini both have to go, so that leaves me and Jonas alone.
I’m nervous about what his expectations might be. We get into my bed together. I’ve got sleep shorts and a tank on, and he strips down to his boxers. I lay rigidly next to him. He turns the light off and rolls toward me.
“What’s wrong, mama?” his voice is soft and soothing, with genuine concern laced in it.
Finding a sliver of courage, I whisper into the soft light, “I’m not sure what you’re expecting tonight.”
“Not a damn thing, other than to sleep next to you. I’m not going to make you have sex with me. I don’t force myself on women. Ever. For one, I’ve never needed to. For another, just the thought makes my stomach churn until I want to throw up.” He brings his hand up to cradle my face, “Nothing is going to happen between us that you don’t want to. Ever, mama. I promise,” Then he leans in and kisses my cheek, before laying back down on his back with one hand tucked under his head.
Relieved that I got that out, I move closer to him and rest my arm over his taunt stomach and rest my thigh over his. He tucks his arm under my body, making our new position more comfortable. His other hand rests over mine on his abs.
I drift off to sleep feeling safe next to a man. It’s an unusual feeling that I’m becoming more accustomed to.
A loud noise rips me from a deep sleep, and I feel Jonas jerk next to me. I’m not sure how long we’ve been asleep, but something loud definitely woke the both of us.
“What was that?” My voice is rough with sleep, even though I try and whisper. My eyes are heavy from waking with Zander when he had a bad dream, only about an hour ago.
“I’ll go check it out.” Jonas’ voice is deeper than usual, and brings all kinds of tingly feelings that shoot straight to my pussy. It amazes me that even in a whisper he manages to turn me on.
“’Kay.” I slur, and rest my head on my pillow again.
I can see Jonas’ shadow bend down probably to put some bottoms on over his boxers. Straightening, he moves soundlessly to the bedroom door. His limp from his injured leg is more pronounced from lying in bed for a few hours. He cracks the door and peers out before he slips out, closing it with no noise behind him.
I let my eyes close while I wait for his return. Then I hear a loud crash, followed by a shout from Jonas.
“Heather! Call nine-one-one!” His voice is urgent, making me jump out of bed, snagging my robe and phone as I move toward the door.
I dial the emergency number and put the phone to my ear as I try to pull my robe on simultaneously. There are distant sounds of a struggle from the other side of the door.
“Come on. Come on!” I whisper loudly into the ringing phone.
“Nine-one-one. What is your emergency?” A man’s voice sounds in my ear.
