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“Then it’s settled. We keep going. I make you come whenever you want. And if you want to stop, tell me, and I’ll respect your decision.”
She studied me from under her lashes. “You make it sound so easy.”
“Because it is. We agreed to stay married for a year, and so far, I’d say our marriage is going great. As long as we work as a team and communicate, we can let this evolve into whatever it needs to be. And when it’s over. It’s over. I’ll respect your wishes.” I winked, hoping to sell the lie. My feelings had been developing for a while now. If I was being honest with myself, I probably started falling for her on our wedding day. When I took her hand and promised her everything would be okay.
But last night had changed our dynamic in so many ways. We hadn’t just crossed the line. We had crushed it and then set fire to the rubble. There was no going back. I had felt her come on my fingers; I’d been inside her body; and I’d felt our hearts racing together, syncing, as I held her close.
“Because I’m not staying.” The words sent panic flaring inside me, turning that inferno of desire into a scorching pain.
“Of course you’re not. I know I can’t keep you forever.”
She smiled, but her eyes swam with tears as she squeezed my hand.
“But I’d like to have you while I can.” I brought that hand to her cheek, hoping she could sense my genuine need for her.
She pulled out of my hold and scrambled out of bed. Grabbing her robe from the back of the door, she whipped around and then wrapped it around her naked body, putting a physical and metaphorical barrier between us.
“I don’t want to tell Dylan.”
I froze, taken aback. The guilt had been eating me alive for weeks. Now that this was officially something, I assumed we’d tell him. Wanted to tell him. We’d deal with his inevitable freak-out and then move on.
“My sex life is none of his business,” she continued, pulling her robe just a little tighter around her. “I’m a grown-ass woman. I date who I want. When I want. I don’t need him getting all patriarchal on me.”
“Of course not. But I feel like he should know if this isn’t platonic anymore.”
She shook her head. “The last thing I want to deal with right now is his overprotective bullshit.”
I stared at her, not sure how to respond. On the one hand, it was none of his business, but on the other, he was my best friend. And I promised him I wouldn’t cross the line.
“It’s just…” She turned to the window, taking in the spectacular view of the mountains. “I’ve spent my entire life planning for the future. Sometimes living only for the future when the present was particularly shitty. And for once, I want to enjoy the now.”
I stood and rounded the bed until I was standing behind her. Cupping her shoulders, I squeezed her, hoping to reassure her, then wrapped her in my arms, ignoring the way my erection pressed into her delicious ass.
“I’ve got this amazing husband, a gorgeous log cabin with my own damn library, and I’m back in my hometown for the first time in ten years. Life is good. I don’t want to fuck it up by adding expectations and disappointment.”
I tipped my head and kissed that special spot where her neck met her shoulder. “Then let’s enjoy the now and not worry about the future just yet.”
She turned, still wrapped in my embrace, and traced her fingertips over my chest. “Do you really mean that? We can keep things between us? And just enjoy the temporary?”
“Yes,” I said, placing two fingers under her chin and lifting until she was forced to look at me. “We have fun together. You finish your dissertation, I train, and we do not talk about the future.”
Finding her waist, I tugged on the belt of her robe and kissed my way down her neck.
“And now that we’ve got the business out of the way,” I said, gently pinching one nipple and making her squeal, “I need to get back to work.”
She moaned as the robe hit the floor.
“It’s my husbandly duty to provide you with at least three orgasms a day.” I backed her up until her calves hit the bed and pushed against her shoulders, grinning as she let herself fall onto the mattress. Dropping to my knees, I took the opportunity to push her legs wide open.
“Is that right?” she said, arching her back off the bed. “I’m so impressed by your dedication to the job.”
I shrugged, biting her inner thigh. “What can I say? Being married to an overachiever is rubbing off on me.”
* * *
After our morning sexathon, I took off to train for a bit, feeling better than I had in years. Sex with Hazel was better than any protein shake. I ran faster and lifted heavier, and I would be swinging my axe with purpose now. I was a man possessed. After my session in the gym, I wandered out to the area behind Henri’s house we used for training.
Next to the shed filled with axes and chainsaws and climbing spikes was a massive pile of fresh logs waiting for me. Donning gloves and picking the heaviest maul, I got to work.
