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My heart was in my throat, and I instantly felt sick to my stomach. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think about her. I did often. I didn’t know how to stop worrying about her wellbeing. At the end of the day, she was still my mother.
I loved her, regardless of how volatile our relationship was.
Before I could get a word in, Christian stepped in front of me and spewed, “What the fuck are you doing here?” to her.
This time I didn’t stop him from treating her like shit. She deserved that and more.
Lifting her hands up in the air in surrender, she shared, “Your aunt told me where you live, Kinley. I’m just here to see my daughter and to tell you both congratulations.”
Autumn and their mom sprang into action, getting our guests to go inside to give us some privacy. Jax didn’t leave, not that I expected him to.
“You’re not fucking welcome here, so you can turn your ass around and walk out the same door you walked through.”
“Christian…”
He jerked around, getting right in my face. “No! I am not doing this shit with you again. I don’t need to remind you of what happened the last time you didn’t listen to me, do I?”
My chest was rising and falling with each word that flew out of his mouth while my gaze was still cemented to the woman who’d given me life. It was like I was that little girl all over again, praying that her mom would tuck her into bed.
I never thought this day would come.
Or maybe I did…
Either way, it was here, and I had no idea how to handle it.
Christian was right about everything he was saying. I felt it in the core of my being, but I couldn’t stop the emotions that were wreaking havoc as to what to do with her sudden appearance in my life again.
The sad and apologetic expression on her face was tearing at my insides, one by one. I felt it in my heart, in my bones, in the pit of my stomach. The guard I had up when it came to her was breaking with her standing in front of me.
“I’m so sorry,” she breathed out, hanging on by the same thread I was. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am. I have no excuses for myself. The only thing I have is my profound remorse. I never meant to hurt you, either of you. Kinley Care Bear, I love you more than anything in this world. I’m asking you to please have mercy on me and allow me to be in your and my grandson’s life.”
Christian didn’t falter, spinning around and roaring, “Over my dead body!”
Those four words.
That one statement…
Threw my mind right back to that night when I didn’t listen to him.
And I’d been living with that regret ever since.
Chapter Twenty-Four
—Kinley—
Then
I blew out the twenty-four candles on my turquoise cake before Christian kissed me.
“Happy birthday, baby.”
We were at his parents’ house celebrating. Everyone who mattered to me was there, except for my mom. For the last two years, she was a mess. Some days were better than others. She was drinking, off her meds, and I didn’t know what I could do anymore.
Christian was over it, tired of what she was constantly putting me through. On top of worrying about her endlessly, I was over at her house a lot, making sure she was at least eating, and her house was cleaned up. I was terrified she’d throw up in her sleep and choke on her own puke. I was constantly checking in on her.
The last thing I wanted was for her to die because of the decision she’d made while intoxicated.
I desperately tried to make Christian understand, and all that would end up happening was us arguing about why I was defending her, still taking care of her, and putting up with what she was doing to me.
