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With a neutral expression, he informed, “I don’t cuddle. They never spend the night. I fuck them, Autumn. It’s that plain and simple.”
I grabbed a rock and chucked it at his head, but he ducked. “You shameless bastard!”
“Keep your voice down.”
“Why? No one can hear me! Is the truth too hard for you to hear, Julian?”
He disregarded my outburst, crouching in front of me. “Let me help you. You’re bleeding.”
I pushed him, and since he wasn’t expecting it, he fell back onto the grass. Powerless to control my anger, I lunged at him. “You fucking asshole!” Hitting his chest with all the strength I could muster, I yelled out my frustration, “I hate you! I hate you!” I repeated, wanting it to become part of him as I slammed my fists into his torso.
“You’re right! I am a fucking asshole, and you need to stay away from me.”
“You’re the one who followed me out here! Just like you followed me out into the woods with Daniel! You’re the one who kissed me, remember?”
He knocked me senseless, professing, “How could I forget? It was the only kiss that has ever mattered to me.”
Chapter Fourteen
—Autumn—
Then
I hit him harder. “Stop playing games with me!”
All my sadness.
My anguish.
My love for him that wouldn’t go away.
My hate for him for pushing me away.
I saw all the girls he’d bring around. All the times he’d ignored me. Every time he didn’t look my way. I saw it all. With each blow, I felt a little more of myself die inside.
I went to hit him again, but he caught my wrist, so I tried with my other fist, and he caught that one too.
“Enough!”
“Fuck you!” I flung my body, whipping all around, desperately trying to break free from his strong hold.
On my wrists.
On my heart.
On my soul.
“How could you use me like that? I thought you cared about me! I thought I was different! Why would you kiss me if you were just going to screw me over like you do every girl you sleep with? Why?”
“For fuck’s sake!” He immediately flipped me over, getting on top of me, and holding my wrists above my head while the weight of his body held down my legs. “What do you want me to say? You want me to tell you I’m sorry, kid? Is that what you want?”
“No! I don’t want your bullshit apologies you’d only be saying for Christian!”
“Did I kiss you for Christian too?”
“Just tell me how many more times you’re planning on breaking my heart, you dickwad!”
He jolted back for the first time like I had hit him again, but this time it wasn’t by my actions—it was the reality of my words instead.
