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“A long time ago, one army was laying siege to another army. The other army wouldn’t let them in the city, because that’s what a siege is…”
I see Skol roll his eyes in a way that’s probably supposed to be subtle but isn’t.
“Anyway. The first army, they built a giant horse and left it at the city gates, and told the city they were besieging that it was a gift and they were going to go away now.”
“An obvious ruse,” Kain comments.
“Not at the time, because nobody had ever built a giant trick horse before. Anyway, spoilers, the horse was a trick. The besieging army pretended to leave, and the soldiers of the city took the horse inside. Later that night, when everybody was asleep, the horse opened up and the besieging army swarmed out and took the city from the inside.”
“Yes,” Kain says. “Something like that, but you are no soldier. You are no danger. And that is good, because that’s exactly what we need, someone so pathetic and so completely useless, Leonidas would never suspect her as being part of our army. All we need her to do is open the gates and deactivate Leonidas’ defenses. She could do that.” He’s not talking to me anymore. He’s addressing Azlan. “She could carry jammers and transmitters, code breakers. She could get us inside, and once we’re inside…”
“NO,” Azlan roars, his fury making the walls shake. “Ava is my mate. She is not expendable. She is not a token to be traded, or a strategy to be used. She. Is. My. Mate.”
He pounds the table to emphasize every word, his eyes glowing gold and furious at all of us, though perhaps not me.
Everybody falls very quiet. The only sound that follows is one of cringing chewing.
* * *
Not long after, I am up late, feeding the babies. They need to eat every three to four hours. As I suspected, the goat milk is not good enough for them. It is keeping them alive, but it is not keeping them satisfied, and they are fussy, missing their mothers. Buttface has come into his own as a baby blanket, helping to soothe the infants by laying his body over theirs, a warm, purring presence we all appreciate.
“They are hungry. Even when you feed them.”
It is Kain, looming out of the darkness.
“I know,” I say. He’s probably come to gloat at my failure, but that is what it is. I can’t pretend this is working anymore.
“They won’t grow strong on this food. It is made for lesser beasts.”
“I know,” I repeat.
“They need their mothers, before their mothers dry up.”
“I know,” I say one last time. My voice cracks, betraying my emotion. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, to keep trying even though I know what I am doing isn’t really enough.
Kain walks around and crouches in front of me, speaking in a low purr.
“What would you do to save them?”
“Anything,” I whisper.
He nods, as if he expected that answer. “You can help them, and all of us by going to the Den. It won’t be easy, and Azlan won’t like it, but I can take you as close as we dare, and you can walk the rest of the way. Once you’re inside, Azlan will be forced to act. This situation needs to come to a head. Azlan is stalling. He wants to do the right thing, but there are no right things when dealing with wrong people. There are only lesser evils. Leonidas needs to die.”
I’d like to disagree, just out of principal, but I can’t. I am holding a tender infant who should be with his mother. Pure innocence, suffering for the selfishness of some fuck-addled male driven by the need to dominate everything. I’ve never met Leonidas, but right now I’d happily exterminate him.
“You’re afraid to disobey Azlan, but he would forgive you. Would you forgive yourself, if you did not act now?”
I’m impressed at Kain’s sudden diplomacy. He’s not talking to me as if I am an idiot alien anymore. He’s talking to me like someone capable of making a difference, and that is intoxicating in its own way.
Tonka squirms in my arms, letting out a soft growling whine. He doesn’t know it, but he is the most persuasive person here. Azlan wanted me pregnant when he met me. He wanted to make me a mother. This little alien cub has made me feel motherly, and those maternal feelings come with an obligation: the need to protect.
I look up at Kain, standing over me in the moonlight, his arms folded over his chest. He doesn’t expect anything from me. He’s desperate. That desperation further motivates me, because he’s right. Azlan won’t act in a way that will put me in danger, but none of this is about me. It’s about a lot of other Leonids and their babies, and they matter more than one human ever could.
“What do you want me to do?”
* * *
That’s the question that brought me here, to the place where another question comes out of the dimly lit landscape as I approach the gates which now loom so high over my head I feel like an ant.
