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He held on tight. ‘I’m seeking help, Raven, learning to change. But I need you. Without you, all this will be for nothing.’
She finally turned in his arms. The look on her face threatened to stop his breath. ‘You can’t do this because of me. You should want to seek help for yourself.’
‘Sí, even I get that. But nothing I do will have any meaning unless you’re part of that change.’
‘What exactly are you saying?’ she whispered.
Go for broke, Rafa. Hell, there was nothing left to lose. No, scratch that. There was everything to lose. Without her, his life had no meaning. So he took the biggest gamble he’d ever taken.
‘Lo siento. I got it horribly wrong. I’m sorry.’
‘What did you get wrong?’
‘Not seeing the treasure I had in you until it was too late.’
She shook her head and grimaced. ‘I’m no treasure, Rafael. I am just as damaged as you. I fooled myself into thinking a half-life was better than letting myself feel. You made me see that I’d let my father’s treatment of me cloud my judgement so I pushed everyone away.’
His hand tightened on her waist. ‘You know what I want to do?’
She shook her head.
‘I want to track him down and ram my fist so far down his throat, he’ll never speak again.’
‘Don’t let your shrink hear you say that.’
His smile felt grim and tight. ‘I said I was trying to change. I never said I was aiming for saint of the year.’ He sobered. ‘I’m disgusted that my behaviour brought up what happened to you when you lived with him.’
‘That’s just it. Deep down I knew you were nothing like him but I’d programmed myself so thoroughly I let myself grasp the excuse when everyone told me you were nothing but a ruthless playboy.’
‘And of course I went out of my way to prove them right.’
‘If you were, you’d never have agreed to stop flirting with other women. Never have refused Chantilly’s blatant invitation.’
Raven saw the flash of self-disgust and pain in his eyes.
‘There was a time when I wouldn’t have.’
‘Past tense. You’re a better man now. A better person.’
‘Because of you.’ His knuckle brushed down her cheek in a gesture so soft and gentle, tears threatened.
Despite the foolish hope that threatened, Raven’s heart remained frozen. She couldn’t remain here. If she did, she’d end up making a total fool of herself.
‘I have to go—’
‘I love you,’ he rasped in a whisper so fierce it sizzled around the room.
‘I...what?’
His heartbreakingly beautiful face contorted in a grimace. ‘I’m still broken, querida, not so much on the outside any more, but I’m a long way from being perfect. And I know it’s selfish of me but I want you so very desperately that I have to ask you to consider taking a chance on me, flawed and hideous as I am.’ Acute vulnerability shone from his eyes and, when he grasped her arms, Raven felt the tremor in his fingers.
‘You love me?’
‘I have no right to, and I can’t promise that I won’t be a complete bastard on occasion, but sí, I love you. And I’ll do anything to make you agree to hitch a ride with this broken wagon.’
‘Rafael...’
He kissed her silent, as if he was afraid of what she’d say. She kissed him back, infusing every single drop of what she felt into the act. Somehow, he got the message.
He pulled back sharply, the question blazing its intensity in his eyes.
‘Yes, my gorgeous man. I love you too.’
A frenzied tearing of clothes followed that sweet, soul-shaking confession. They made love right there in the living room, on the plush, expensive rug helpfully supplied by the five-star hotel.
She held her breath as Rafael slid on the sheath and prowled his naked body over hers. Hardly believing that this beautiful man was hers, she caressed her fingers down his firm cheek. He turned his head and kissed her palm, then, being the shameless opportunist he was, he kissed his way down her arm to her shoulder, then over her chest to capture one rigid nipple in his mouth.
At the same time, he parted her thighs with his and entered her in one bold thrust. Their coupling was fast, furious, their need for each other a raging fire that swiftly burned out of control.
When they’d caught their breaths, Rafael moved, picked her up and walked her into the bedroom.
‘Should you be doing that?’ she asked.
‘I’m a renewed man. I can move mountains.’ He let go of her and she tumbled onto the bed. Before she got totally lost in the effortlessly skilled seduction she knew he was aiming her way, she placed a hand on his lips.
