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“Vicious?”
Jumping to my feet, I shook my head. “Changed my mind. I can’t do this. I need to ride.”
Ghost reached out and grabbed my arm. “Don’t do it, man. I know you’re overwhelmed right now, but you can’t leave Linsey to deal with this all by herself.”
“She’s not mine! I don’t want the bitch! Fuck her and fuck this shit. I just want to be left alone!” I shouted, yanking my arms out of his, backing away as brothers stopped what they were doing and looked at me. My mind was spiraling fast. If I didn’t get out of here, I was seriously going to lose it. “I need to ride.”
“Let’s ride,” Sandman growled, getting to his feet before walking out of the clubhouse. Following the large quiet man, I hopped on my bike and peeled out of the compound. Closing my eyes for a mere second, I let the warm sun and wind on my face calm the raging storm brewing deep inside me. When I opened my eyes, I found Sandman riding next to me as Shadow raced along my other side.
I didn’t care. I was on my bike and free again. With nothing but the open road before me, I let everything plaguing my mind vanish and just lived in the moment.
This was what I knew.
What I liked.
What I needed.
In my haste to leave, I never saw her standing in the hallway with the ol’ ladies behind her.
Six
Linsey
“Linsey!” someone shouted my name as I ran from the clubhouse to the small cabin that was first assigned to me. I didn’t know what happened while I was gone, but I understood Vicious clearly.
He didn’t want me.
Not that I asked him to even consider me, but his words still hurt. I barely talked to the man. I didn’t know what the conversation was about, but his words were crystal clear. The man didn’t want anything to do with me. He hated me so much he left. Hell, he didn’t even stay in his house last night. As soon as he showed me the master bedroom, he bolted as if I had scalded him.
I could take a hint.
I wasn’t stupid.
There was no way I could stay at his house now. I didn’t know why his words bothered me so much, but the second I entered my small cabin, I fell to the ground and cried. It felt as if my heart was breaking. It made no sense. He didn’t even know me. We barely talked. I knew he looked at me all the time, but it never went further than that. Did I imagine the desire in his eyes, the longing for something more? Was I projecting my own needs?
For as long as I can remember, I had one wish. Just one. I wanted to be chosen first. Just one person to love me for who I was and not what I was born to be. I wanted a family, kids of my own. I wanted a husband that only cared about me, someone who didn’t care about how many zeros I had attached to my name.
Someone who would look at me and only see me.
The real me.
I guess some part of myself kind of hoped for more. Was it wrong to want more? I’d always played second fiddle to my sister. She was more important than me. I knew that. I accepted that and never, not once, did I let that interfere with my relationship with Davy. My sister was the one I loved the most. I just wanted someone to want me.
When I came to Tennessee, part of me hoped for that fresh start. That chance for something new and exciting. Then I saw him and I wondered, what if?
Out of all the brothers, Vicious was the one who captured my eye. The one I felt the biggest connection to. I saw myself in him the most. He was an extremely attractive man. I loved how he interacted with his daughter. He was gentle and soft-spoken. Always one of the first brothers to volunteer or lend a helping hand. Brothers respected him and sometimes sought him out for advice.
In the whole time I’d been here, I never heard him raise his voice. So, it was a shock to enter the clubhouse to learn it was him that was angry, but to learn that his anger was because of me. Well, I couldn’t handle that. He’d been so generous and kind until that moment. I didn’t know what I did to anger him, but I knew there was no way I was going to live somewhere I wasn’t wanted.
“Linsey?” Matrix calmly said, kneeling before me, “You okay?”
Shaking my head, I wiped my tears, but more fell. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No babe. It has nothing to do with you?”
“Don’t lie to me Matrix. I heard him. He was angry because of me. How can I live in his house when he hates me?”
“He doesn’t hate you.”
