Page 27 of His Last Nerve

After she had gone to bed, Jackie called me. She told me my mom was having her lawyer come by the house next week—to update her will.

Her fucking will.

Of course, I panicked, because I feared my mom was losing her fight. She didn’t want to fight anymore, and that was on me. I was never home and when I was, I was diving headfirst into work, looking for another ranch. I couldn’t afford a minute of calm and quiet. I couldn’t afford to take the time off. Working insured my mother’s treatment was paid for and that was the only thing that mattered to me.

Yet, she was updating her will.

Once I’d gotten off that phone call, I could feel it coming: the panic, ready to chew me up and spit me out, leaving me in a ball of worthless anxiety on the floor. I didn’t have the time for that, so I jumped in the shower, scrubbing every inch of my body three times while counting to a thousand.

Finally, it dissipated, slithering back into its dark crevasse.

By the time I was dressed and ready for sleep, Mr. Moonie called.

Once that was over, I found myself staring at the ceiling, my thoughts drifting away from the stress and pressure to something else.

Something gray.

Smoke.

Intoxicating smoke that surrounded a man I had no business thinking about, not this late at night, not while lying in bed. Yet, here I was, closing my eyes and picturing his face.

His dark beard, tan skin, gray eyes. I wanted to suffocate in them. My mind wandered even deeper, going back to the first day I’d met him, the day he pinned me against a wall with his forearm. The skin on my neck prickled as I remembered the way he stared down at me, holding me captive—

What the hell was wrong with me?

I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

Nope.

I was just tired. That’s all this was: lack of sleep on a crappy bed in a state I’d never been to. That’s all this was.

Yet, when I fell asleep, I was surrounded my gray smoke…

Rain.

It was raining.

More like the sky had opened and decided to dump its entire water supply directly over Hayden. Thunder had woken me up hours ago, but anxiety kept me awake.

I worked for an hour or so before getting a cup of that nasty hotel coffee. Then I went back to work for another hour. Once I finally got ready, I took my time as I tried to calm my mind. The rain helped with that, actually.

Summer was here and the heat was on its way, or so I thought.

When I got ready, I liked to have the TV on and turned to the weather channel, and today was no different. I was curling my eyelashes when the weatherwoman announced that the storm had brought in a strange, drastic cold front.

Well, shit.

I finished my make-up and headed to the window to pull open the curtains. The sun was supposed to greet me, but a gray cloud that reminded me of a certain cowboy’s eyes, was in its place. I touched my hand to the glass.

The temperature was dropping.

Suddenly, my mind was on the Hallow Ranch, and other ranches in the storm. Temperature drops like this were unusual in Texas, but I didn’t know about Colorado. Were the cows okay?

Oh, now you care?

Shut up, conscience.

Bite me.

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