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Sputtering and moaning lightly, I flushed the toilet and slumped over the cool wall, waiting for my heart rate to return to normal.
After a few minutes, I finally felt strong enough to stand, and I ambled toward the sink to splash some cold water on my face, clearing my cloudy head until I was normal again.
That was odd.
Padding back into the bedroom, I pulled open the closet to search for an outfit from the online order that had come in weeks before. Shimmying out of my nightgown, I moved to slip the sundress over my head, but as I did, I winced at the tenderness in my breasts. Gasping, I dropped the garment and circled back toward the bathroom, eying my naked form in the full-length mirror behind the bathroom door.
I blinked as I took in my figure, studying the subtle but definite changes in my body. My hips appeared rounder, my chest fuller. My nipples were darker, and there was an almost indiscernible swell in my abdomen.
Oh, gods.
I had been old enough to remember these changes in my mother, long ago as they had been. But had they happened so quickly?
I had no basis, no education on these matters, just my gut instinct and the obvious changes in front of me.
The wind knocked out of my lungs, and I stumbled back, shocked at my own stupidity. I was a rabbit. My fertility was renowned. I should have foreseen this, even in a world where pregnancy was scarce. Why had I not been more careful?
Maybe because I hadn’t wanted to be. Maybe because this was what I had secretly wanted?
Inhaling, I forced myself to think rationally. I couldn’t know for sure, not yet. I had to do a test… didn’t I?
Retreating to the bedroom again, I hastily dressed and perched on the unmade bed, willing my brain to make a plan. There had to be a protocol, a plan for moments like this. Who else had I known that had been pregnant in my life besides my mother?
I vaguely recalled my youth and the process she had endured during all those awful deaths. I had blocked out the trauma after her death. But there had been so few others to give birth since then. I thought about my childhood friends, but almost all had been only children, the few I could recall having older siblings.
I couldn’t even envision seeing a pregnant woman outside of the ones my father had helped through his practice, but they had come and gone in the blink of an eye, none of them remaining long enough for me to even learn their names.
There must be some kind of test in Father’s office.
But that would require me returning home and facing my father.
A rap on the door shattered my mounting anxiety for half a second, and I rushed toward it expectantly.
Ash sensed something was up with me and came to check on me!
Throwing open the door, disappointment gripped my gut as Rachel stood in the hall.
“Morning,” she chirped brightly. “Did I wake you?”
I shook my head, shifting my eyes away guiltily. I was sure my current predicament was written all over my face.
“Good. I just wanted to let you know that Ash is off the estate until this afternoon, but he says he’ll join you for dinner.”
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I nodded, unable to find my voice.
Rachel peered at me speculatively. “Are you okay? You’re a little pale, Briar.”
“I think I ate something that didn’t agree with me last night,” I lied. “I’m going to lie down for a bit.”
Concern colored Rachel’s face, and she reached forward to touch my forehead, but I ducked back, worried that she might be able to feel the new life growing within me.
Instantly, she withdrew her hand apologetically. “Sorry. I just wanted to see if you were running a fever.”
“I’m not,” I reassured her with a weak smile. “I’m just feeling a little wonky. Nothing a bit of rest and water won’t cure.”
“I’ll have one of the maids run up some crackers and electrolytes for you,” she promised. “Call if you need anything else.”
“I’ll be fine,” I reassured her, lying through my teeth again.
