Page 56 of Catatonic


Font Size:  

CHAPTER13

CLAWDIA

Iawoke tangled in golden arms with tears streaming down my cheeks. My body ached from the feeling of a night of pleasure with my soul pair. Zaide's glowing scars and my glowing bonding tattoo mocked me as I wiped my face. I felt sick at my betrayal of a man who loved me. Who only last night worshiped me and promised me forever.

I scrambled out of bed, heaving sobs causing fat tears to pour from my eyes, snot from my nose, and a keening moan from my throat.

“Little Cat. What is wrong?" Zaide's sleep-deepened voice drawled from behind me. As he became more aware, his tone became more urgent. "Why are you crying? Did you have a nightmare?”

He tumbled out of bed after me and scooped me into his arms before I could protest. To be honest, I couldn’t say much at all, I was so hysterical.

“Do you—do you regret what happened last night?”

I nodded, thinking of the kiss with Baelen. But my heart stopped when Zaide stilled. His hand, smoothing my hair and back, froze. I looked up at him, saw the horror on his face through the blur of tears, and sobbed. “No. No. No. I’m sorry.” But I wasn’t making sense to him, and I felt his guilt, his worry, and his fear as though they were my own.

You kissed a man that wasn't your soul pair, your bonded love. You are a monster. You deserve this pain.

The bedroom door slammed open. “What the fuck is going on here?” Charlie shouted.

He’d also felt my pain and guilt and sadness and had come running. I saw his eyes dart around the room, and I knew his assessment of the situation would come to the wrong conclusion, but I was helpless to stop him.

“No. No. No,” I moaned.

“Zaide, do you want to explain to me why my familiar is crying and naked in your arms and saying fucking no?” He growled in a voice I had never heard from him before. Disaster stirred in the air, building to a crescendo with every moment that I couldn’t get my words out. The tension choked me as much as the guilt did.

“I … I—" Zaide stuttered.

“Charlie, no,” I moaned and took deep shuddering breaths to try to calm down.

He came to kneel in front of me and didn't look anywhere except my eyes as he placed his hands on my knees. “Clawdicat, what happened?” he asked gently and then turned to Zaide and growled, “What the fuck have you done?”

Zaide’s voice quivered, sounding helpless as he said, “She woke up—”

“No. I’m sorry,” I interrupted, Zaide’s pain hurting me more than anything. I squeezed Charlie's hands as I sobbed again and tried to calm myself.

You are the worst person.

“You don’t have to be sorry, Clawdicat. Keep taking big breaths. That’s it. Calm down. It’s all right.” With my eyes squeezed shut to hold back a flood of tears, I heard Charlie’s voice darkened, and I knew his next words weren’t aimed at me. “I’m going to fucking murder you if you pushed her into something she wasn’t ready for.”

“I would help you. Little Cat, I’m so sorry. I thought you wanted—”

“No, Zaide. No. Stop. I’m sorry.” I took deep gulping breaths. “It’s not that. I didn’t mean I regretted us. I don’t. Not for a second.”

The tension in the room deflated like a balloon. Charlie sagged and asked cautiously, “So this isn’t—?”

“No,” I whimpered and turned to the golden beloved face of my soul pair. “Zaide, you know how I felt last night.”

His devastation turned to confusion and relief as he asked, “What did you regret this morning then?”

“Is it dragon related? A nightmare?” Charlie asked, drawing my attention back to him.

“Yes, a little bit.” They opened their mouths to ask more questions. I stopped them. “Just let me … calm down. I’ll explain.” I tried to suck the tears back into my ducts and stop thinking about the giant mess I had created.

I already raised a dragon and betrayed my soul pair. Now I just need to commit murder, and I would solidify my place in hell. I deserve it for being a rotten person.

Zaide’s arms were around me, but both men soothed me with their soft voices and warm caresses. When I finally felt in control of myself, I said, “I love you both. And I’m so sorry. I haven’t told you something and last night, I did something unforgivable.”

“What?” Charlie’s voice squeaked, and I realized it was because I had casually announced my love for him. In front of Zaide. Without me telling him in person first.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
Articles you may like