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“Okay.” Ava did as she was told. Her brows crunched together as she tried to concentrate. She took that deep breath, and nothing happened.
“Try relaxing your shoulders as you let your breath out. Just let your whole body sag,” Max suggested.
Ava gave a subtle nod before she tried again. Her shoulders sagged and her knees bent. Her hands dangled at her sides, and she even let her head fall back on her neck, but her wolf refused to come out.
“Don’t worry,” Max intoned gently. “Just relax and know that this will come.”
But Ava’s eyes were open now, and tears were swimming in them. “I don’t know that it will.”
“Sure it will.” Hunter stepped in now, eager to offer some guidance. “Like Dad said, though, make sure you relax. Getting all tense and stressed out will make it harder.”
Max gave him a look of pride, but the glare from Ava was one that suited a younger sister who didn’t want advice from her older brother just now.
“Easy for you to say,” she grumbled. “You get to do it all the time.”
“Sweetie, it’s all right.” Sarah hated this for her. She knew how important this was. Ava needed to know the side of her that’d been so imprisoned that even she hadn’t seen it. “It does sound easy for those who get to do it on a regular basis. It feels hard for you right now, but it won’t always be. We’re here for you. Why don’t you just give it one more shot, and then you can take a break for a bit.”
She still looked doubtful, but Ava nodded. She closed her eyes, relaxed, and grew limp. Sarah bit her lip when she saw nothing happening, but then her heart shot up into her throat when she spotted Ava’s hand. Her short fingernails had suddenly turned into thick, dark claws.
“Ow!” Ava screamed. She yanked her hand up to her face, staring wide-eyed at what she’d just done. “You didn’t tell me it would hurt that bad!”
“It won’t always,” Max hurried to tell her. “I’m sorry. At this point, I don’t even remember it hurting. You’ll get there, too.”
“Try again,” Hunter encouraged. “I bet you can do even more next time.”
The claws had retreated, leaving human fingernails behind, and Ava shook her head. “I think I’m good for now.”
“I’ll go,” Sarah volunteered, figuring Ava probably wanted some of the attention off of her. She might not have grown up like other girls her age, but she was still a teenager.
“Are you sure you want to, Mom? It doesn’t feel good,” Ava cautioned.
“I know.” Sarah gently laid her hand on Ava’s cheek. She was such a sweet girl, despite all that had happened to her. “But your dad is right. Even though it hurts at first, it won’t always. I know it didn’t hurt when I used to shift all the time. It probably won't be that great for me at first, but I’ve got to get it over with.”
Max gave her an approving look and nodded.
There was no need for anyone to give her advice or guidance. Though she hadn’t experienced her wolf in many years, this wasn’t the same as coaching someone new to it. Unlike Ava, Sarah knew what she was missing. Still, she followed the guidance that Max had given Ava. Her lungs filled, and she consciously forced her muscles to relax. It was like shrugging off your human form to let out the beast representing your true self. But it’d been so long. Sarah felt like she was reaching into a past that didn’t exist anymore, like trying to recreate childhood memories.
It wasn’t easy, though she hadn’t expected it to be. Her human side had kept her wolf locked away for the last sixteen years, making it far stronger than the beast that lived inside of her. Sarah could feel the barrier between the two sides of her, thick and resistant. If she was honest with herself, she was scared, but she was born a wolf shifter. This needed to happen, and there was no point in waiting. She forced another breath in and out.
It'd been hesitant at first, not sure if there was a pathway out. When she summoned it a second time, her wolf came ripping out of her. She felt her skin give way to thousands of hairs, making a thick fur sprout all over her body. Excruciating pain blistered her skull and seared through her body as her bones twisted and bent, conforming her to the new shape. A thunderous sound filled her ears as they moved higher up on her head, and she felt just as much as heard the bones cracking in her face as her muzzle stretched out. Sarah’s body twisted and writhed, making her completely lose any orientation or balance. She fell forward, but her paws caught her just before her face hit the ground.
Slowly, Sarah pushed herself upright on all fours, blinking as she looked down at her body. Sleek silver fur covered her chest and legs. The grass felt cool and comforting beneath her paw pads, and her tail was a natural extension of her body. Everything she’d already noticed about the day was suddenly enhanced several times over. A squirrel moved through the underbrush on the other side of the clearing. Turning, she could see it clearly. It paused, knowing danger was near. Excitement filled her blood.
You look beautiful.
That voice in her head was one she never thought she’d hear again. Sarah turned away from the squirrel to see that Max had shifted as well. Damn, he was handsome in either form he took. His fur was slightly darker than most of the Glenwoods, his eyes still as bright as they were in his human form. He was strong and muscular, sure on his feet.I’m sure that shift wasn’t too beautiful.
Does it really matter?He moved a couple of steps closer.You did it, and I’m glad. I’ve missed this so much.
Sarah closed her eyes as she felt the deep comfort of having her mate again. Being cut off from him was one of the cruelest punishments Edward could’ve given her, other than forcing her daughter to live the same life. Perhaps that was exactly why he’d done it. He’d known just how much it would hurt, and that was what he was after.Me, too.
“No, you really can’t compare yourself to anyone else,” Hunter said, and Sarah turned to see that he was still trying to coach Ava. “Just because your mom—our mom—did it that quickly doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. It’s just going to take some time.”
Now that Ava’s here, I can see he’s actually been listening to me all these years.Max’s voice was amused as the two wolves took a short walk around the perimeter of the clearing.I swear I’ve told him the exact same things when it comes to training. He’s always thought he ought to be able to get the hang of everything right away. Eventually, he realizes he just has to put the time in.
I’m sure Ava will figure it out, too.Sarah glanced at her daughter, who was kicking her toe in the grass but nodding and responding as Hunter spoke to her. Her heart hurt for her. No, her heart hurt for both of them. They were her babies, and they’d been done wrong. There was nothing she could do to fix any of it, other than try her best to make things better as they all went forward. Would it be enough?
You don’t have to worry about them.
