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Silence fell as Beckett finished a few more steps of the exam, checking for concussion and sluggish reflexes.
As he started asking her more medical questions, I peeked over my shoulder to find Nolan pacing back and forth, his fingers once again twisting in the chain of his necklace as he talked to someone on his Comms. I gave Lea’s shoulders one more squeeze. “I’ll be right back, are you gonna be alright?”
“Yes.” She nodded, wrapping the blanket around her a little tighter, her shivering dissipating slightly.
I walked over to Nolan, my stomach tightening. By the way he held tension in his jaw and shoulders, I knew the call wasn’t a positive one. “What’s wrong?”
“That was Liv,” He shoved the Comms back in his pants’ pocket. “Another body showed up with Elliot’s marking. Looks like a few of us have to get over there.”
My stomach bottomed out, my veins running cool. This day was just getting worse and worse as it went on. How would it end?
The Elliot case was my priority; I wanted to know every detail and experience everything firsthand so I could help track him down. However, my heart lurched, knowing that I couldn’t just leave, not with everything Lea had just been through. We were always there for each other, no matter what. She had been there when I needed her, and I wouldn’t abandon her.
But what about all those people who Elliot had taken from life? Didn’t they deserve my attention too? They deserved retribution, even in the Gods-blessed Afterlife. I wanted to bring their souls peace, so they could finally enjoy paradise with Lunestia and Firenielle. I couldn’t just give up on them.
But I couldn’t abandon Lea, either.
“We don’t need the full unit this time,” Nolan said, taking a step closer, lowering his voice to a murmur. “You should take Lea home, she needs you right now.”
My chest lightened at his words, letting me know that my instincts were right—that the decision I wanted to make was the one he agreed with. Instead of letting me struggle, he read me like an open book and confirmed what I needed to hear.
“Don’t worry,” he smirked, giving me a wink. “Liv is meeting us there, and I’ll take Eden and Greyson with me. Since you probably won’t trust any report I write, I’ll make sure they report everything.”
I scoffed. “My, how generous of you, delegating all of that work for my benefit.”
“What can I say.” He leaned down, his warm breath tickling my ear.“I live to make you smile one day.”
“You’re a dork.” I shoved him away, ignoring the fluttering beat pulsing in my gut. I punched his shoulder for good measure, reminding myselfthatwas how I treated Nolan. “Try your best not to mess anything up while my fascinating mind is preoccupied with other things.”
He shook his head, an amused chuckle escaping his grinning lips. “I’ll try my best. Now go and take care of your friend.”
“Thank you,” I whispered, the fluttering intensifying as I turned around; and, somehow, I felt the lingering warmth of his gaze on my back as I walked away.
***
I brought Lea right home, arranging to have a soldier transport her cart back to her forge. I planned to head on over there and make sure everything was closed and locked after I got Lea washed up and to sleep.
I tried my best to keep the conversation on other topics, not wanting her to feel forced to talk any more than she wanted. It was one thing asking her questions in a professional capacity; I needed those answers to investigate, to get her retribution and closure on what happened. But I had taken my armor off the moment we walked through the door, removing any trace of my Onyx Guard status. At that moment, I was just her friend, meant to support but not pressure, giving her the space to process and think while also being a place to fall just in case she needed it.
We sat in silence on her bed, the glowing embers of the fire in her bedroom hearth illuminating the space as I gently brushed the tangles of her freshly-washed curls. Her fingers hadn’t stopped shaking, even after the warm bath she had just taken and the thick fleece shirt and pants she’d put on. She needed rest and sleep; hopefully that would help.
“How do you do it?” she whispered, her hazel eyes staring into the fire, legs crossed in front of her.
My fingers stilled, the brush in my other hand hovering above her hair. “Do what?”
“Fight those people. Risk your life.” She shook her head.
I shrugged, returning to one of the pesky knots, being as gentle as possible. “It’s my job, it’s what I was called to do.”
“I always knew it was what you did, I knew the logistics of the Guard…everyone does. But I never really saw you until today. The focus and courage and heart it must take to be willing to run into danger like that just to help others. To face people who…who want to hurt and kill. You were a sight to see, Kas. It was awe-inspiring.”
My chest tightened at her words. Plenty of people had told me that over the years, told me about my skills and my natural abilities, how I was born to be an Ibridowyn. I always believed it, and I would mimic their words; because this was always what I had been called to do, with or without my family’s legacy. But in the past year, with my doubts, along with those of my family and the High Faction, it was easy to forget. Even with my fellow Hierarchy members around me, it was easy to convince myself that they were only saying those words to make me feel better. My mind always tried to persuade me of that.
Yet, when Lea spoke them—someone who saw me as a protector not someone to be protected—they lifted me. Her faith sang to my soul, calling it forward again. It reminded me why I wanted to sign up for the Guard in the first place and why I kept fighting today, even when my darkness tried to convince me to give up.
I was born to be an Ibridowyn, to follow through on the oath I had taken to my country and its people.
Tsio a Chisain.Protect the Peace.
