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We both cried out, his mouth on my neck while his strokes deepened. The rhythm of our bodies, the pulsing of our pleasure, the sound of our skin together, everything melded magically around and within us. When we were connected like this, nothing else existed. Time ceased to march onward and the only thing we were aware of were the climactic actions of our ecstasy.
“William, please,” I whimpered while he found the place inside me that had me crumbling. “Please, I’m going to come again,” I groaned into the crook of his neck.
“I know, my love, I know.” He gripped my jaw, pulling my mouth to his.
In the kiss I let go, falling over the edge, coming away from my body almost entirely as I wrapped around him, his name on my lips. William cried softly when I gripped him with release, spilling inside me.
“I missed you,” he crooned and I shivered. “I missed you, God, I missed you,” he groaned into my mouth, trailing his kisses down the line of my jaw, throbbing inside me still.
The sorrow swelled in me when he rolled off, pulling me into his arms. I laid my head on his chest, tears silently rolling down my cheeks. It was clear to me just how much I had lost, given up, by hurting him in this way. Years I could have spent with him healing, learning to live again, had been spent festering. And this–I trail my fingers over his skin–this was paradise.
I peered at his content face, watching his eyes flutter closed.
“William?” I asked quietly. His eyes still shut, wrapping his arm tightly around me, he gently acknowledged me. “Can you forgiveme?”
William’s eyes opened at once, he rolled onto his side to prop himself on his elbow. He looked so tantalizing, mussed hair and wild eyes.
“Rosemary, I do not want you to ever think for one minute I begrudge you anything. You had something taken from you; you lost your child, your family, and your husband. You are entitled to make the decision that you made. I forgive you, if that is what you desire, but I have never once felt anything more than sadness and regret for hurting you.”
“I love you. I want you to know that I always loved you,” I whispered through tears. “I feel like I have wasted so much time, time we could have spent in bliss.”
“But instead, we grew, the both of us. We learned, we lived, and we continued to become better versions of ourselves, haven’t we? I spent much of that time reflecting on us, how aloof it must have seemed I was, how I’d hit you—that is unforgivable. How much I obsessed over keeping you and the baby safe and in that one track mindedness, I failed.”
“You tried your best, William.”
“As did you.” He kissed me, lingering, taking my bottom lip into his mouth. It grew quiet for a moment, and he laid back down. I rested my head once more on his chest, twirling my fingers in the hair around his nipple.
“Are you going to tell me the truth about what happened between you and Noel?” I asked, off handed, playing with his long fingers.
He sighed deeply, “I suppose I do owe you that, don’t I?”
“You do.”
“We met in the 1570s. I grew up in the countryside of England as you know, part of a wealthy family in trading. Noel had just lost her parents to the plague and became the charge of the nearby Earl.
“At that time, I only knew that she was lovely; young and single. She was studying religion, which was not unheard of at the time, but an educated woman was dangerous. She began to visit the village where I grew up and we crossed paths many times.
“My mother was taken with her, she had hoped it would be a good match due to her benefactor’s status. We courted for less than three months and Noel was infatuated. I loved it at first, but as time passed and she grew increasingly bedeviled, I would often find her standing in my room at night or in the windows after dark.
“It was unnerving. She threw fits of jealous rage, and at the time, there was a rise of murders throughout the area; particularly of young women. I became paranoid, as I realized most of those murdered girls I had spoken to just the day before. They had been brutally dismembered and drained of all their blood.
“I had a sinking feeling in my gut who it might be but dared never speak it. I know now it was her.” I stared in terror as he relayed this information. This seemed typical Noel behavior and I kissed the tip of his fingers in reassurance.
“I cannot imagine how horrifying that must have been for you,” I whispered. He carried on with his tale, jaw working with the stress of it.
“As the day of our nuptials approached, I found her naked in my room. I was immediately put off, but everyone kept encouraging me that I should be thrilled she was so enamored.”
“What happened?”
“Did I have sex with her?” William clarified. “Yes. After, however, she said she was going to make me hers forever. There was something menacing in that, as we laid in my bed afterward. There was an undertone of her voice that told me she was serious, and there was no romance behind any of it.
“I remember getting up and telling her I could not marry her. She was livid, she began to shriek, tearing my bedroom to shreds, breaking my windows and furniture. I tried holding her back, but she was stronger, faster, more powerful than any man I had encountered. She held me down, bit me then drained me and fed me her blood.” His eyes were years gone and I gripped him tightly, the chill of his lament sinking into my bones.
“When I came to, I was still naked, chained in some dirty barn. She had raped me, I came to find, during the process.” Anger raised inside me like a thousand hot pokers. She was sick. I steeled myself against the reaction, how dare she? The entitled bitch, I’d rip her head from her shoulders myself.
“Darling, it is well. I broke free after the Change, fled from her. The ripple through the town was intense. My family thought I had died and my mother began to suspect Noel was behind it. As the town turned against her and the Earl, she begrudged me more, hunting me any chance she got.”
“Why did you not tell me before?” I questioned. He shrugged, looking at the ceiling.
