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Nikolas was pretending to read some emails. Ben perched on the desk, blocking his view of the screen.
Nikolas sighed and leant back. “You are probably right. They will want to see that I have left the country as ordered.”
“What! They’ll…track your movements?”
Nikolas hesitated for a moment then slid open a draw in his desk. His hand hovered over a hanging file, and then he plucked a burgundy passport from a folder and flicked it to Ben. “It has expired. I will have to renew it.”
Ben opened it and choked back a laugh at the picture. Like all passport photos, it was grim. “Where did you have this taken?”
Nikolas twitched his nose. “I don’t know. It’s not me.”
Ben’s jaw dropped a little. A stab of realisation hit him—he was looking at the adultNikafor the first time in his life. But he had thought it was hisNikolas. Despite obviously knowing that Aleksey and Nikolas had been identical twins, Ben was still shocked to see how alike they actually had been.
He swallowed. “Would I have been able to tell you apart for real?”
Nikolas considered the question for what seemed to Ben like an oddly long time. “No one else could, but you would have, yes.”
Ben flashed his gaze up then lowered his eyes to the picture once more. “How?”
Nikolas gently took the booklet from him. “Because I would be looking at you like this and he would not.” Ben raised his eyes once more and was held captive by the intensity of Nikolas’s amber gaze. “And because you have learnt to see the real me, Ben, which no one else has ever done. What’s wrong?”
Ben jerked his head away to attempt to hide the pain Nikolas’s words had inadvertently given him. “Are we tempting fate, Nik, being this happy?”
Again, Nikolas didn’t reply right away. He always seemed to sense when Ben wanted to be taken seriously. After a long silence, he offered, “More of my life has been spent without you than with—that long stretch of time when I thought nothing could fundamentally change who I was. And now I have been given these years of loving you.” He quirked a rueful smile. “Beingin lovewith you. So, I do not intend to waste another day allowing fear to unbalance the complex skein that is my life with you. Do I tempt fate?Fuckfate, Ben. Fuck it, and live each day defying it.”
Ben nodded slowly, but replied, “That’s not entirely the response I was going for.”
Nikolas laughed and caught Ben’s hand, tugging it. Ben relented and slipped off the desk, straddling him.
Nikolas seized a kiss, running his fingers urgently into Ben’s hair, mouthing between the crush of their lips, “See? Defiance.”
Ben slid a hand down, freeing them both from the confinement of clothing until their erections stood swollen and slick in his hand. The kissing made them throb. He squeezed them together and felt the pulse of one through his palm and the other a stab of bliss in his groin. He groaned with pleasure and lifted up slightly, pressing Nik back into the tilting chair, increasing the speed of his wet pumping.
Nikolas seized Ben’s face in both hands and went rigid, his hips thrusting his cock higher into Ben’s grasp as he released, and Ben came hard to the delicious smell and warm splash of Nikolas on his fingers, their spills then mingling, drying quickly and sticky, as Ben brought them down off the edge, and Nikolas, eyes closed, stroked his thumb over Ben’s cheekbones, the pounding of their hearts the only sound Ben could hear.
When he could breathe evenly enough to speak, Ben declared roughly, “I wouldnevernot know you.”
Nik had his mischievous glint back, apparently deciding Ben didn’t now need to be pandered to by being taken seriously. “What if I were in a costume—Darth Vader, for example.”
“Well that’s easy—you’d never wear a costume. It wouldn’t be you by default.”
“Fair point. If you could only hear my voice and I…spoke like this?”
Ben scrunched his nose at another demonstration of Nikolas’s uncannily accurate cut-glass English accent.
“Why don’t you always speak like that, if you can do it so well?”
“What, and miss being mocked by the baby tyrant?”
Ben smirked. “And I’d still know it was you. I just would.”
Nikolas glanced down and murmured slyly, “What if you could only…that part of me?”
“Seriously? I have your dick currently in my hand but you can’t name it? And how is that dumb event going to occur, Nikolas? Me only being able to see your cock?”
“Ah-hah. I wasn’t talking about youseeingit. I was thinking more along the lines of you feeling it.” He seemed to reconsider this idea swiftly and added, “I am not advocating you test this discernment—by comparing mine with others.”
Ben chuckled. “Squeezy suggested we swap around for a bit. Me and him shack up. You and…Tim.”
