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And I was easy prey.
The worst part about what happened wasn’t Cole’s violation of my body. It was my vulgar response to it. That I wanted more. That I was practically begging for it.
My own body betrayed me, responding to his touch in a way I couldn’t have predicted.
So long as I live, I’ll never forgive myself.
To say I was asking for it is an understatement. I knew the game I was playing was dangerous, that the men were hungry. I saw the way they looked at me.
I knew their desires and taunted them, because it was the one thing I had control over. The one way I could rebel.
I played with fire and got burned.
In the best possible way.
I shake my head, trying to extinguish the thought from my stupid brain.
But it persists.
His rough hands roving my body wasn’t the nightmare I was so sure it would be. It was primal, urgent, raw. It was like what I’ve read about in those romance novels. The ones I thought were so silly.
And it was all about me. My pleasure. I’m the one who got off, and that fascinates me. Sure, his cock was pressed against my backside, but he never used it. I’d expected to be raped. Instead, he gave me a handjob.
A very good handjob that led to my first orgasm.
Which was confusing and still is.
Gunther never cared about how it felt for me, and his men didn’t either. I was nothing but a wet hole, and they made sure I knew that.
Before them, there was only one, Seth’s father, but he was too young to know what he was doing.
I was too.
The desire to explore my body is stronger than it’s ever been, but there’s no privacy in the holding. Not that I think the other prisoner would pay any attention to me. He lies so still, sometimes I wonder if he’s dead.
There’s a curtain around the toilet in my cell, but I’m not that desperate. Yet.
That I’m even thinking up masturbation strategies is proof that I’m going insane. I shouldn’t be trying to make myself cozy here. I should be trying to escape. Not that I could.
And then it hits me.
Maybe I can.
Not here, kept in this cell, but if I had more freedom, maybe I could escape and eventually make my way back to Gunther and see my boy again.
It’s not like they’re going to suddenly trust me, especially if I refused to give them information on the Reavers. But there are other ways I could gain their trust. Or rather, Cole’s trust. He’s their leader, after all, and if anyone can give me the freedom I need to escape, it’s him.
All I have to do is seduce him and play the role of misunderstood victim.
Having sex with him won’t even be a chore. Not like it was with Gunther. Cole is handsome, despite being older, and with the way his shirts fit, I already know his abs look like the washing rack back with the Reavers, which brings me more delight than I care to admit.
I can do this. If it means I’ll get to see Seth again, I’ll fuck every man in this place. Heck, I’ll fuck every man left in this world.
Fortunately, I won’t have to do that.
Because Cole holds the key to what I need.
* * *
