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Lillian looked up at her. “I can handle the doctor. You don’t need to watch over me like a mother hen.” She smiled and patted Ruby’s hand. “Go ahead.”
I bit back a smile and followed Ruby out of the room. Fuck, she smelled amazing. Like sunshine and sage. “You look beautiful.”
I hadn’t meant to blurt it out like that. I wasn’t lying, but everything felt awkward today when just last night I was telling her she was other half of my soul.
Why did this have to be so damned complicated?
“Thanks.” She smoothed the velvet skirt down her thighs. “It’s my weekend to do readings at the shop after I take Lillian home.” She finally met my eyes. “You said you wanted to talk?”
I nodded and glanced at the door to Lillian’s room. “Let’s walk. Otherwise he’ll be able to hear everything.”
“All right.”
We found an empty chapel room around the corner and ducked inside, closing the door behind us. She scanned the nondenominational spiritual decor. “This seems like an odd place to talk.”
“If anyone comes in to pray, we’ll leave.” I ached to touch her, but I didn’t make a move. After her past brush with the werewolf in Boston, I didn’t want to scare her. I’d done enough accidental damage to our new relationship last night. “I told Mathias I would be the new Alpha. He’s going to announce it to the pack tonight, and the ceremony will take place during the new moon.”
She checked the door. “Do you think that’s a good idea? That’s when the Coven of Shadows conjures their magic.”
“So they’ll be busy.” I paused, overthinking my next move, but I had to say something. Walking on eggshells like this was making my palms sweat. “Last night…I know I fucked things up, but I need to be sure you understand I have never for a second regretted that my wolf howled when I touched you.” I swallowed, trying to wet my mouth. “I know it’s supposed to be forbidden, and it’ll be complicated, but I’ll do whatever it takes to earn your trust.”
She sat on the upholstered pew and stared at her hands in her lap. “It has to be a mistake.” She lifted her gaze. “We can never be together.”
Her words had my wolf snarling in the shadows of my soul as I shook my head and sat beside her. “On the way over here, I talked to Mathias about the other Alpha and the witch. He told me basically the same thing Lillian did, but there’s a big difference between me and the other Alpha.”
She looked up, a crease forming between her eyebrows. “What’s that?”
“Mathias said the witch wasn’t the Alpha’s mate.” I reached for her hand, but she crossed her arms. “You’re my mate.”
“That doesn’t change anything.” She shook her head. “You can’t start this new era for your pack by breaking a rule that exiled another Alpha.”
I leaned forward resting my forearms on my thighs. “You don’t get it.” I focused on the floor, unsure I could say it if I looked at her. “You’re it for me. I’ll never love anyone else. I can’t just walk away.”
I didn’t expect her to laugh, but she did. “Love?” She struggled for words. “We just met yesterday, and I spent a big part of it being a little afraid of you.”
I looked over at her, a grin creeping up on me. “But it ended with a kiss that set me on fire.”
Her lips curved, even though she seemed to be fighting it. “It was a good kiss, I’ll give you that.” She sobered. “But it has to stop there.”
“Who says? I didn’t make that rule and neither did you.” I straightened up. “I’m going to turn forty this year. I figured the days of finding my mate were behind me. It’s not like I was looking for this, but you have no idea what a fucking gift it is to find you. I’m not going to let some arbitrary rule stop me from spending time with you.”
Her eyebrows rose as she uncrossed her arms. “Do youwantto be exiled and shunned by your pack?”
“No.” I caressed her cheek, and she didn’t pull away. “But if I had to choose between my pack or my mate, I’d choose you.”
She searched my face. “You don’t even know me.”
“I want to know everything about you.”
She closed her eyes, and I was tempted to kiss her. Her lashes fluttered and lifted as if she’d read my mind. “I don’t have your instincts.”
“I know.” I shook my head, lowering my hand from her skin. “And it scares the shit out of me.”
She chuckled. “I’m trying to say this is a huge risk. Maybe we should just be friends like Lillian and Mathias are.”
I tried to imagine it, but all I could picture was pushing her shirt farther down her bare shoulders and kissing the swell of her breasts. But if the other choice was not having her in my life at all, I’d take what I could get.
There was also another option. Maybe Fate had another plan, and Ruby and I were part of it.
