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I close my eyes and grasp the swimsuit, I breathe slowly and intentionally—that’s what thePregnant Mothersarticle said to do when stressing out.This was why I was going swimming. I want to calm my mind and distract myself with a few laps before my afternoon nap. I slip into the swimsuit and take a towel from the bathroom, wrapping the towel around myself and picking up my phone. I begin making my way through the maze-slash-home and find myself standing on the back patio staring down at the pool. Someone isalready there.
I watch him in silence, the air trapped in my lungs, from anger or lust I can’t tell. I’m cursing him as he swims in his little speedo though. Cursing that perfect butt which—I scoff. Who the hell wears a speedo to the pool?
Luca comes to a stop and flicks back his perfect hair, he begins climbing out of the pool. His muscular arms grab onto the ladder and pull him upwards. His torso stretches out with like a million abs, all defined by the shining sun above. His pecs dance as he climbs, jiggling side to side as they strain. Finally his bulge exits the water and all I can do is stare. An ache hits me. Luca is grinning and smiling as he comes forward. I immediately turn red at the fact that he’s caught me!
I back away immediately, hoping he hadn’t yet seen me. Except it’s not me he’s smiling at. A butler comes from below and offers a towel and tray with a drink on it.
I inch forward slightly, watching through the marble balustrade. The ache in my body is different now. It’s not one from my belly, nor one in my head of frustration. It’s one in my heart.
Seeing him smiling … Seeing himnearlynaked too …
The ache worsens.
It’s not his lust I miss, it’s his touch. His care. The moments we’d shared before our stupid last two weeks were so delicate.
What is this?I turn quickly and run for my room. I’m not going down this road. I’m not playing this game. I’m not—but I already am.
I groan as I slam my bedroom door shut and I see his rippling body covered in water.He’s getting out of the pool in slow motion …I throw my towel on the bed and jump in beside it.His grinning face is full of happiness and joy. All that’s missing is me in his arms …I wish for the nausea in my stomach to go away. I wish for the ache in my heart to stop. But all I hear are the caring words he offers me just after we’ve made love for the first time.
I cry out into the pillow for it to stop, but it’s too late.
I know it’s not true. These two weeks have been the longest in my life not because I’ve been bored, but because I’ve been without Luca.
I lie there wishing for the images of him to leave me. I lie there trying to deny my sudden awareness of my feelings. I’m meant to hate him and be caring for a baby! Not lusting for him just because I’ve seen him in a speedo!
But I did.
And Ididsee—
“Enough!” I say to the room.
The silence afterwards shocks me. I’m grumpy now. I need to nap. The baby has been paining me as of late too, and these supposed organ pains aren’t going to stop the further along I get. I roll away from the door and try to forget Luca, again. I try to forget his perfect body and smile, again. His tanned skin and strong but gentle hands, again … I try to forget everything I know of him.
But it’s no use.
As I fall asleep for my afternoon nap, all I can think of is the fact that his door is only on the other side of this house. That his bed is only a few steps further. But more than that, I feel that he’s not that far away at all, because his child is growing inside me at that very moment.
Chapter 14
Luca
EvenasI’mdoingit, I know I’m crazy. Even as I log into our systems and go to the camera footage,I knowI’m completely nuts. And yet I do it. I go to the exact moment I get out of the pool and see the camera pointed at the back patio with Sophie standing there.
Shehadbeen watching me. I’d spotted someone up on the patio as I swam and in my heart had secretly hoped it was her.
And now as I sit here, aware that I am a fucking twelve year old, I don’t know what to think.I’m meant to hate her. It’s because of her that I’m trapped out here which has made it completely impossible to work thanks to the zero fucking signal in the Everglades. I’m sure there’s a whole thing with lead paint going on too knowing my father and his building contacts. But it’s beside the point.
I log out of the security system and frown at the face staring back at the black screen. It’s my face. My stupid ass self. Swooning over a girl almost half my age.
But what we share isn’t bound by a number.
I growl and stand up quickly, the chair shoots back and I storm out of the office, slamming the door behind me. I don’t have time to play games. Especially this stupid crap. Not while the enemy has placed a hit on me. Not while the enemy has grown right under my fucking nose. Not while the enemy sent two fucking novices to try and kill me and Sophie.
Sophie?
I swear and boot the wall. Which I regret immediately. My boat shoes are practically canvas and I’ve just cracked my big toe. “Fucker!” I scream.
The butler coming towards me goes wide eyed and turns around instantly.
